Why does it have to be so confusing?.

[meerkat]

Hi all...I am new to this forum and I would like to get to know some people here.

I have a sticky situation and I would really like some advice on it.

ok..there's this guy at work i really really like Adam ( been about 4 months since it started ) thing is he is really good friends with my mate Jim ( who also works there ) Jim has liked me for years and years and i don't feel that way about him at all, but he doesn't seem to get over it, Thing is I sometimes think that Adam likes me back but I can never find out because if Jim ever found out i don't know how he would react. So I think the only thing I can do is not say anything right. I mean sometimes when I try not talking to Adam for a few days he messages me on the computer and asks why I am not talking to him and if he's upset me..I know I shouldn't tell Adam how I feel. But I think sometimes that I should and too hell with what Jim thinks, it's not my fault that he doesn't get over it. Right am I right not saying anything...or should i...i just don't wanna do anything to ruin there friendship...But I really like Adam and if there's a chance he likes me back shouldn't I take the chance?.

What do you think I should do?.. I know staying quiet is the right thing to do but I need a level headed opinion on what other people think

[cheeze_guy]

you should go with the guy u like and even if it hurts the other guy he'll have ti get over it cuz thats just part of life! maybe if we al relised that it would bit easier

[Chimeros0]

"Keep love out of the workplace",because if something goes wrong.
There's no escape.

But if you like this guy that much,ask him to take you out for a coffee or something.Just tell Jim that your relationship with him is just friends before you do.

You have to be direct with your actions otherwise you'll be hurting yourself & these 2 guys in the process.

[Mrs. Bubbles]

First having a relationship with someone you work with is risky, cause if things go wrong then you still have to deal with each other.

If your willing to take that risk then ask Adam out to dinner or to a movie and tell him how you feel. You cant worry bout the other guy. You dont like it, and hes gonna have to get over it.

[Only-virgins]

You are not responsible for how Jim feels. He likes you, you didn't make him like you. If he gets hurt it is because he chooses to do so when he likes you. Their friendship is none of your concern either, all you should care about is how to get with the person YOU like. Plus, Jim has liked you for years now and nothing has happened right? so how long to you plan on not going out with anyone because you don't want to hurt Jim? of course this is just my opinion.

[meerkat]

We are all going out for drinks soon for a friends birthday. Maybe I can try and judge how he feels then.

It annoys me that I have to constantly worry about the way Jim feels about me. He goes out and gets laid with random people. I am not like that at all. But he still makes it clear that he likes me. I just wish he could forget about me and get with some other girl. That way I wouldn't feel so bad and wanting to be with Adam.

I think about leaving my job sometimes as I think It may help the situation, but I don't want to as I am happy there.

I am just trying to take each day as it comes at the moment but it isn't easy.