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Thread: Why does she do this? Am I taking it the wrong way?

  1. #1
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    Why does she do this? Am I taking it the wrong way?

    My girlfriend says she loves me. she thinks she wants to marry me eventually. I am not so sure yet and she sometimes gets bugged that I do not know for certain the way she does. I mention this cause it seems a sure bet she wants me for the long haul.

    Anyhow, she started working at a place that 95% of her co-workers are male. I suggested the place to her cause I used to work there, it's a tech support call center.
    I don't want to be overly jealous. But ever since she started working there 3 weeks ago all she talks about is how this guy was flirting with her and this guy was and that guy and how funny it was and how sweet this guy seems and how cool this other guys are car is and "Aw, he called me Crys, that's cute". And she gets so excited when she is telling me about the attention she gets from these other guys, I can hear it in her voice and see it in her face.
    I don't get why she does this. If a girl from work flirts with me, I don't go along with it and I definitely don't tell my girlfriend about it cause I don't want her to feel jealous or compared or anything.

    I am not really a jealous person, I don't think, and I have not said anything to her about it yet. But is it unreasonable for me to be bothered and worried about this?

  2. #2
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    How old are you two?

  3. #3
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    Yeah, you both sound insecure, but this is something that can fade with maturity. You are insecure about her interactions with her co-workers. Her insecurity is apparent because she is overly concerned that her male co-workers find her attractive. She already has a boyfriend, she shouldn't be interested in attention from anybody else.
    Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from bad decisions.

  4. #4
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    Thats a great question, why would she go on about how other guys flirt with her to you? That can't be a good thing. I don't think this bothering you makes you insecure either. She's either doing this to make you jealous or she's really getting off on all the attention and is totally unaware of how it bothers you. Personally I wouldn't deal with it. That can't be healthy for any relationship.........ever. You should talk with her about it, she's probably gonna call you jealous and insecure though. If you did it to her, I wonder how she would feel about it.

  5. #5
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    So ther are not like "what happened at my new workplace" stories? Is it mostly about other guys flirting with her and how nice they are? When she tells about it again, ask her, how does she think/feel about it herself.
    Is she happy with the amount of attention she is getting from you?
    You are right to find it strange. Try to understand the reason why is she telling you these stories, ask her about it. She probably wants to get something from you (reaction, more attention, reassurance etc). Or just too much excited with novelty.

  6. #6
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    She probably gets the same amount of male attention, pretty much anywhere, so I doubt this is new for her. She wants you to get jealous and tell her how much she means to you. She's already been talking about marriage with you, and you not being sure is making her insecurity rear its head. She is trying to make herself seem desired by other men, so that you will desire her more. I'm glad you're not giving into it. Next time she starts talking about the really cool guy at work, tell her to go date him and start walking out. When she freaks out(and she will) tell her that you care very much for her, but she clearly has the hots for this guy or she is intentionally trying to make you jealous, and you're not going stand for it, so she stops or you leave.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng View Post
    She probably gets the same amount of male attention, pretty much anywhere, so I doubt this is new for her. She wants you to get jealous and tell her how much she means to you. She's already been talking about marriage with you, and you not being sure is making her insecurity rear its head. She is trying to make herself seem desired by other men, so that you will desire her more. I'm glad you're not giving into it. Next time she starts talking about the really cool guy at work, tell her to go date him and start walking out. When she freaks out(and she will) tell her that you care very much for her, but she clearly has the hots for this guy or she is intentionally trying to make you jealous, and you're not going stand for it, so she stops or you leave.
    i really like this idea.

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