Okay, so first of all, I'm 15, and i have had one boyfriend, and that was back in September, and it lasted like two weeks. Ik, it doesn't seem like a big deal… but it is when people always have the need to remind you every second it just brings back the terrible memories. I don't know… I feel like I am mentally stupid for dating him and I am not cut out to date a really good guy because I was so blind. Anyway, let me tell you all of the things he did, and basically I just ignored all the red flags and still dated him. So Im sorry if this is long, but I really just need to let all of this out to someone.. hopefully you guys take the time to read?? … and here goes the WORST relationship in history….
First, he wasn't even that attractive. He was rude and mean to everyone, except me (at first). He had a back up plan (another girl) if I didn't say yes to him, and he told the girl this, and I even knew about this. He followed me around constantly, and it was actually mad awkward around him and he made me feel extremely uncomfortable, and we had no sort of connection in any way. He asked me out on a dare, in front of all my friends (lame) and I said yes anyway.. and from then on it was too awkward. He even said to everyone "guys don't leave us alone.. because she will have nothing to talk about and it will just be awkward." Of course this is such an asshole thing to say, but I'm such an idiot I just let it go. I thought it was MY fault for things being this way around him. I thought everything was my fault...
From then on, our first date was… okay… I think I pretended to be into him so I could get my first kiss AND I felt left out because all of my friends have already had boyfriends. And damn did we kiss.. in fact we made out… a lot. Probably the only compliment he gave me was that I'm a good kisser. Our freaking first date was mostly making out, and it wasn't romantic at all in any way. Now my first kiss is ruined to the worst guy in history, and my first date was terrible. Anyway, all we ever did was go over each other's houses, and… make out. HE USED ME. But at the same time, there was never anything to talk about with him bc he was so rude and unfriendly in general, so I would rather make out then deal with his awkwardness. LOL and then one time I agreed to come over his house to play minecraft but then we ended up just making out. And for some reason, I feel like its my fault we never had anything to talk about, because I feel like I always acted like an idiot around him… i never felt like i could just be myself around him...
Also, he started asking when he could touch my boobs, and i said that it would be for a LONG TIME so you minds well break up with me if thats what you want. He said that wasn't his intention.. of course. He also tried to persuade me to take my shirt off when we made out one time. -__-
And then he just got rude. I started realizing this is the reason he has no friends. He was first rude to my friends when I wasn't around, and then he just got rude to me. Its like he completely stopped texting me, and whenever we talked in person he just looked mad BORED and would roll his eyes or tell me I'm stupid. Oh yeah, and his younger sister told his whole family that I am really stupid. Great. But of course I didn't do anything. Then, when he started getting distant, I decided to ask him whats wrong, and when I did, he said this to me "What do you mean whats wrong? I'm not doing anything, so idk what your problem is or what you r talking about. Are you high or something? *he says smirking* Is something wrong with you?" At this point I was in shock. I knew things weren't going to last much longer… I talked to my friends about it, and they said I should try talking to him again one more time. So i did.. it went a little better.. but not really. I told him it just feels distant between us and awkward, like somethings not right. And idk why. His response was this, and he had an annoyed smile on his face: "umm idk but idk what I'm doing. Unless I'm just extremely bipolar or something, idk what I'm doing..." And then I just nodded awkwardly and said, "umm… okay then." And then I saw him roll his eyes when he "thought" I wasn't looking. At this point I couldn't take it anymore.
I broke up with him that day. It lasted a week and a half. Yaaaayyy….. I will let you know if there is anything else I can think of.. But now I honestly feel anxiety when another guy likes me, because I am afraid they will act the way he did towards me. He was such an asshole and such a WEIRDO now that I realize it, and I feel like such an idiot for dating him. EVERYONE warned me not to, but I ignored them. And now, EVERYONE has the need to remind me about him, whenever they get the chance, even though it was been almost half a year since this week and a half relationship. I just feel like I am doomed to be known as "the idiot girl that dated the worst guy in history" and I will never be able to happily date someone that I will really like and that treats me good.. It's just, lately I have been thinking about this a lot lately, and literally whenever I think about him, I feel like puking or punching a wall.. lol. I deserve 999999999 times better i know. But it still hurts. Idk what to do to forget. I just kind of hate myself for ever even CONSIDERING going out with him..
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And when people ask me things like "omg why would you ever go out with him?!" I'm just like, I don't know!! Okay?! I DONT KNOW. It's so frustrating.