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Thread: In need of female advice, I care about this girl very much.

  1. #1
    Join Date
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    In need of female advice, I care about this girl very much.

    Here's the thing, i'm a 27 year old guy & a year ago (nov 2011) I met a 22 year old girl in college that I fell absolutely in love with. At the time we met we got along great with conversation and we laughed and talked at school for hours, and I got her number before Xmas break. I texted her and she texted me back frequently to chat and say hey, and her and her best friend agreed excitedly to hang out with me. I was very happy and hopeful. Sadly, however, I noticed that she began a relationship during the break and I felt completely devastated. I couldn't understand how this was happening either, before this I had never felt so much for one person before.

    I saw her around a couple times early this year in Spring Semester, including once at a dance where we danced together and had tons of fun. After that though I didn't see her for a very long time. A friend of mine had noticed on Facebook that she had become single in April which was a relief to me, even though I hadn't contacted her in awhile. This October I saw her for the first time in 9 months, I ran into her downtown, said hello and took a fun photo session with her on my phone, to which her friends joined as well.

    From this point on, I saw her around downtown more often, and she began inviting me out once a week, and then twice a week up until the last couple of days. We basically started getting along really well we would meet each other out, we would talk and her and her friends would laugh at my stupid jokes, and the girl I like would playfully hit me and act goofy with me and stuff. It was amazing and wonderful, and it made it even better that almost every time she was the one texting me first to hang out.

    Then, this last Wednesday she invited me out with her friends to go dancing at this bar downtown. I was happy, and we had drinks and danced. It was cool too because her friends liked me a lot and danced with me as well. So while i'm dancing with the girl I like, she takes my hand and holds it in hers multiple times while placing her body against mine, clearly showing an interest. So after this continues, I decide to kiss her when she is facing me. I kiss her in a sweet way and she reciprocates the kiss nicely. This moment in itself was the best, most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life. I have never felt so much for someone for so long and finally had something like that come true. We soon after leave with her and her friends and she takes me to her place to spend the night. Her friends push me into her room and I go inside and kiss her on her bed. She takes her top off and we make out, I begin to pull of her pants instinctively, but she doesnt want to have sex which I immediately respect and pull them back up for her telling her that i'm okay with that. We stay up for about 30 minutes talking and cuddling and everything is going great. While we are talking we realize that our lives are unbelievably similar in many ways which makes me even more attracted to her. In the morning, there is absolutely no awkwardness whatsoever. We have conversation and she gives me a ride to my car. On the way I mention what her friends said the night before about going out again tonight, and I say that if she feels like hanging out to hit me up. I don't act needy in any way, even though I truly am ecstatic to have had this night with her, so I keep conversation casual and fun. So when I leave I kiss her twice, but for some reason the way I said goodbye sounded completely idiotic. I feel like I killed the mood on the way out.

    She texts me later to say that shes just going out to have a couple beers at a nearby bar. I say to hit me up when shes leaving and i'll come join. Its cool because this is the place where I work so everyone knows me there. So I get there, and its her, her best friend, and one of their best guy friends. The only place to sit is near her best friend, so I do. When I sit I have to be honest, everything is pretty awkward for about 15 minutes. Not much is being said. After time passes, however, the guy friend leaves, and its just me and the two girls. At this point, everything slowly becomes cool, we all talk, joke, and reminisce about the night before. We all three even joke about me and the girl I like hooking up, which makes the whole situation more comfortable. I make playful jokes about her snoring and curling up in her bed, and the goofy pictures on her wall which throws them both into a laughing fit, and has her playfully saying she hates me. Her best friend jokes with me also. Its basically going really well. But it seems that we're all maybe on a friendship level with it though which I can't tell is a good sign or not. Hard to tell though, we all three seemed unsure of how to establish what exactly was going on with me and the girl. Like a friends with benefits thing, which her best friend actually calls us during our conversation at the table. So we leave after about an hour, and on the way out I hug her best friend and simply hug the girl I like. As i'm walking away her best friend is like hey come hang out day after tomorrow.. to which I tell them to text me about it.

    So, that day comes around and the girl I like texts me, and says that instead they are just going to have a girls night out since its her best friends last day in our city, which is true she was moving away the next day for good. I was really sad because I felt like this night was my chance to say something meaningful to the girl I like, since she herself would be going home for the break for a couple weeks. I didn't hear anything from her for two days, & on my Facebook news feed I saw shes going home so I texted her to "drive carefully its been fun seeing you" and she said "for sure have a nice break!".

    I think she likes me because shes always texted me first, and a couple times before we hooked up she would text me after we hung out. I've always made sure shes not been pressured & now I don't know what to do. I love this girl with all my heart, and I may be overanalyzing but i'm scared that i've done something wrong. I don't want to lose her like I did last year. Women of the world, I really need your help.
    Last edited by woohoo77; 18-12-12 at 06:55 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    Dude you really need to settle down. Even tho you think you don't act all need and desperate...she knows you are and is feeling your vibe, that's why she's pulling back on you....she isn't where you are at and you are knocking this whole thing out of proportion...what a way to F uck everything up. You need to drop the feelings you have invested in this casual affair. Stop being such a wuss, it's killing any chance to get a girl. By my guess-timate you got friend zoned.

  3. #3
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by woohoo77 View Post
    I think she likes me because shes always texted me first, and a couple times before we hooked up she would text me after we hung out. I've always made sure shes not been pressured & now I don't know what to do. I love this girl with all my heart, and I may be overanalyzing but i'm scared that i've done something wrong. I don't want to lose her like I did last year and I don't want to cry anymore. Women of the world, I really need your help, I will be forever in your debt for the rest of my life.
    Wow, you think she likes you because she texts you first? How about the part where you spend the night in her bed in a semi-sexual event? All lights are green here, you just need to tell her how you feel and ask her out with confidence. She has shown you more than enough for you to believe she would reciprocate. If she says no, then oh well, you can't be friends while you love her anyways. Believe it or not, rejection is better than sitting in limbo.
    "All is fair in love and war." - Francis Edward Smedley

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