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Thread: Just need a Womans outlook! Long story!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
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    1

    Just need a Womans outlook! Long story!

    Ok it's quite a situation I am in. We starting talking in February and she had a boyfriend. I am not the homewrecker type of guy and she was not a cheater because I did know her and enough about her to know that but we just couldn't stay away from eachother. It seemed like we were just drawn to eachother. She was having problems in her relationship for almost a year proir to us hooking up. We began seeing eachother just about every single day whenever we could. I don't know if love was even in the equation but it happened, we fell into it. We talked about being together and she said that she had to stay in the home until her lease was up. With her relationship going down the drain we saw eachother even more and one night just happened to find eachother at the same night club one night and we were both drinking so we went to the dance floor and did and danced and even at times kissed. Next morning her man found out and kicked her out so she moved in with her grandparents. Though her grandparents did not want her seeing me we continued to see eachother. Things were pretty good, we would see eachother before work for coffee and she would bring me leftover food so i could eat for lunch and we would even escape out of the city for weekends at a time. This went on for about 1 1/2 months after she was kicked out. I guess she continued to talk to him over the phone and one day told me that they were going to try to work things out, that he said that he was a changed man and that he was going to give her everything that she wanted. I wasn't a surprise to me because they were together 4 years prior to our thing we had. So she left me and moved back to himin June, and not even 3 weeks later she calls me telling me that she regrets moving back can't do without me. She told me that i made an impact on her life and that the only reason that she went back to him was to see if there really was anything left in their relationship. She told me that he didn't change and lost all trust for her, he has her on time constraints and always gives her a tough time to go out. She told me that she understands why he is like that but other than that he hasn't even changed. I just couldn't stay away so i told her when the lease is up its either him or me and if its him than she could forget about me. This time around knowing that she is probally doing her bedroom thing with him I started going out and soing my bedroom thing as well without her knowing. Time has gone by and we still talk and she has told me that she can't wait till the lease is up so we could be together without having to sneak around. She continued to call me and bring me food and even see me around her time constraint schedule and till this day she does. I would even call off of work and have over to be with her for the work day. Her lease is up at the end of this month (September). She has admitted that her relationship has nothing anymore and they talked and won't be living together any longer and also told me that this time she is sure that she wants to be with me but with the lease deadline nearing she has been changing a little. Still meets me in the mornings, brings me food and calls me over her best friend any chance that she gets but she seems different, she is a little quiet and serious now. It could just be me. This past Friday she went out with her best friend and told him that she would be home early because her friend had to work in the morning and they ended up staying a little longer so he called her and told her not to come home or he would hit her. She still went home and had a big argument (he almost hit her) and almost got kicked out. Today she told me that she was a little worried, i asked her why and she told me that she is worried about the change. We were talking about getting a place and moving in together a little after her lease is up but today she said that she wants to give it a little bit of time and take it slow before we do so and that she might even get her own place for a little before we move in together. I told her that she could take her time. The reason she still lives with him is because her mom recently moved into her grandparents house because she is moving out of state and there is not much room there now and she wants to get her half of the security depisit which is over $1,000. I haven't seen another girl for a while now because she has done things to prove to me that she is serious about me like selling her theme park tickets that she was supposed to go to with him and canceling her vacation out of state. I am a really worried that there could be a possibility that because her fear of change that she could do the same thing again and stay with him but then again they are not going to live together. I don't know why she is changing, i hope that is just bracing herself for the change because that day is coming. Whatever the outcome of this mess is, I know that I brought it onto myself. She is really a good woman that will do anything to make sure that her man is happy and content but she was just pushed too far by a careless man that she once loved and probally still loves. I don't know if she still wants to be with me even though she told me today that she does. And if she does want to be with me, i don't know if I should just tell her to call me when the smoke from that relationship clears or juststick around and be there for her. What should I do?
    Last edited by 2 SAA B; 06-09-07 at 02:30 AM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Seattle
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    16,935
    Quote Originally Posted by 2 SAA B View Post
    What should I do?
    People don't stay together because they have a lease. They stay together because they want to. If she wanted to be with you, she'd be with you, but she isn't. She's with him. She's messing around with you, but she's with him.

    Pretty soon, she'll be with you and messing around with him on the side.

    Wash your hands of this mess and walk away while you still can.
    Spammer Spanker

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