This builds off all my other crap with my ex. I have been on this forum telling my story from where the problems arose, through the break-up and on and on and on....
Now we have some more fun! Well I came home this weekend, so really I came to the same house as my ex. We havent spoken for 3 months. Abotu 2 weeks ago she sent me texts pretty much saying she was missing me and crap. Oh BTW she has a bf and had him from the day we went out.
So... I'm home, very awkward between her and I. I didnt speak to her or really look at her. She would try and speak to me and I came back with small, simple, direct answers which was the best. But as the day progressed we became more talkative and eventually became more comfortable with eachother.
She then asked for a hug (she loves hugs and so do I especially long ones) sounds childish I know. Well this is where I should've said no, but I figured why not as most of my feelings have faded and hers are supposedly gone. Well this hug was outrageously long, and it started casual then slowly became to where we got a lot closer, pressing bodies on eachother, rubbing eachothers hair, back, etc...
Then when we finally split we are still holding eachother pretty close. Then it was like a tease game of how long it would take to kiss. I knew she wanted to which is bad since she has a bf (or prob had now). I knew in my head I shouldnt but with this guy I really didn't care as he was the guy that took her away > any other later bf I wouldnt have. Well so we started kissing, getting closer, and more intimate kiss. Then my father happens to walk downstairs(where we were) and so thats where it ended. It was probably for the best it ended there.
Well then I went to the kitchen and she followed and pretty much just talked and joked around. Then she started a texting convo. In the end it ended up with her saying "Wow that was fun" "And that felt good" etc...
So I guess I failed with my steps to recovery, but at the same time I really dont feel as if I changed much form this incident. Really none of the feelings came back its just blah. It kinda just feels like a night after a party and thats all.
Since this already happened there is nothing I can do to change that. I know it was a bad idea. You guys think I should leave it at that, or tell her what we did was wrong especially for her. I'm starting to think she is the type of girl that like that rush, that dangerous feeling and cheating does that for her, so probably best I am out of the relationship.