So ...what to make of this?

**Confused2005** · 07-11-06, 08:18 AM

Hello forum,

Sorry, but this is a fairly long post!

I do find your insight useful

Basically, I have been seeing a girl for the last couple of months. I phoned her tonight and one of her friends answered her mobile and I got the response "she is on a date with her new boyfriend".

As you can imagine, I was not too happy about this...and thought it was a joke at first.

I dont really want to go into any detail about my "girlfriends" recent past but she has had a pretty hard time of it lately.

I phoned her mobile again after about 15 minutes, realising this was not just a horrible joke her friend was playing....and her friend told me she was looking after her kids, had her mobile and not to phone her (the girl I am seeing) ever again.

Well, obviously I took no notice of that, as I would I think it was fair to hear this from the horses mouth, and phoned her a couple of hours later.

And my alleged girflriend answered.

She told me that nothing sexual had happened between her and this guy....and I do actually believe her about this.

Apparently this guy is someone she has known for several years and she told me she does think a lot of him. And he is saying he wanted to marry her and move in to her place...personally I think this sounds weird....any guy who is willing to do that without actually learning what someone is about by dating etc, in my book, is a bit strange. But nevertheless, that is what she said.

I was very understanding and didn't lose my temper. I simply said that if she saw a future with this guy then thats what she had to do. Go out with him and take things forward. I would not make things difficult and would simply dissapear never to be seen again.

She then started crying and got very upset. Telling me we are still friends and if people didn't like us being friends then it was their problem.

I am not sure I want to do the "friends" thing. Personally I find this is only OK if you are not the one that thought it was going to be more than friends!

Anyway, to ask a straight question do you think I should try to "win" her back or just basically move on, stop talking to her and just let it go?

I am sure I could win her back, but in all honesty I am not sure I have that in me anymore....I am too old for this and would rather just find someone who wants me without these sort of problems!

In fact, I am not really aksing a question at all....but writing this post made me feel better....so thanks for listening anyway