Girlfriend sick - I am to blame

[fredflinstone]

Hi ladies,

I'd really appreciate a woman's perspective on our situation and some advice on what I can do.

My girlfriend went overseas for two weeks and came back yesterday, but before she left, she wouldn't let me pick her up from the airport and said she was going to take a taxi back. Wanting to surprise her, I rocked up at the airport but because she managed to get her baggage and clear customs in only 25 minutes, I ended up missing her and she had jumped into a taxi.

She sent me a text but at that stage her cab was about 10km away as I was walking inside the terminal, so I called her and she told me she was already on her way home. I asked if she could get her taxi driver to drop her off somewhere near by, she said no and she’ll see me back at her home. She sensed I was a bit miffed so she got her driver to drop her off at some shops. I got there and picked her up but she had already been waiting half an hour in the cold.

Here’s the thing… she was waiting outside in the cold where it was about 10 degrees and windy, wearing only a tshirt, shorts and sandals as it was summer over there. She’s complaining of dizziness, having fevering symptoms and having headaches so no doubt she’s sick with a cold

We both know I’m at fault here so is there anything you can suggest I can do, or say? She’s got school today so she probably won’t be able to concentrate and at best, it’ll take her a week to get over a cold.

In hindsight, I should have just let her go home and met her there. Any suggestions how to make it up to her?

[MerryH]

Is she mad at you? What did she say about it?

[lahnnabell]

This isn't rocket science, buddy. Help nurse her back to health! Pack her some cough drops, tissues, and some soup. When she's home and resting, rub her feet with some soothing peppermint lotion. Make her some chamomile tea.

[HeartIsAching]

News flash... there are these tiny little lifeforms called bacteria and viruses that operate completely independently of weather conditions. You can't catch cold by being in the cold, nor by being wet. That's an old wives tale. She got sick because she was exposed to something she had no antibodies for.

It's not your fault she got sick.

[jnr1005]

Not really your fault, she is an adult and can make desicions for herself. It would be nice of you to bring her some soup and cold meds. That would show you care.

[bulrush]

Your gf doesn't know how to pack for the trip home. It's not your fault.

But you can be nice by giving her some chicken soup, and maybe one of her favorite magazines she can read while staying home from work.

News flash... there are these tiny little lifeforms called bacteria and viruses that operate completely independently of weather conditions. You can't catch cold by being in the cold, nor by being wet. That's an old wives tale. She got sick because she was exposed to something she had no antibodies for.

Not exactly true. Cold weather has a lot lower humidity, thus drying sinuses and throats, and making them more likely for a cold or other virus or bacteria to get established in there. The mucus in our sinuses protects us from foreign pathogens like colds and bacteria.

Also, studies show that the flu virus (influenza) is much stronger in cooler climates and cooler areas of the body, like the sinuses. Simply raising the temperature AND humidity of the air, helps prevent many colds. I only get 1 cold per year since I have done this in my own house, which is a great improvement. But I can do nothing about my work environment.

[fredflinstone]

Appreciate all the responses.

MerryH,
She's not mad at me, but more at the situation and what transpired. No girl wants to be left in the middle of the road freezing cold so I accept it was an error of judgement. I've apologised to her and she said "not to be silly", but she's told her friend that she was surprised I came, but not pleasantly surprised...I guess because of what happened.

lahnnabell,
Unforunately we don't live together so I can't do any nursing, but thanks for the suggestion of chamomile tea - never thought of that! We're not in a position to have each other over either, so really going out is the only opportunity we have of seeing each other.

It doesn't stop me from showing her I care though, so tonight I've made sure I've been contactable, but she's been complaining of her symptoms and I can't help but feel helpless.

HeartIsAching/jnr1005/bulrush,
I guess I feel responsible because it was my call for her to get dropped her off halfway and we had already agreed that we'd meet at her place. She called back (which surprised me) out of guilt and put me onto the taxi driver who told me where they were and I told him roughly where to drop her off.
Her waiting in the cold may not have directly caused it, but we probably can all agree it has contributed more or less.
I have got no idea what to say when she says she's sweating, her head aches, her stomach hurts and she feels nauseous. Any suggestions?

[bulrush]

Sounds like influenza to me. She should drink lots of liquids. I mean 8 oz every 2 hours, and be religious about it. Whether it's water, fruit juice, or soup. get those liquids into her. It will help the body flush out the illness. Then, treat for symptoms: aspirin for head ache. Pepto bismol (bismuth salicylate) for the stomach. As for the fever, for influenza, I sweat it out. I wrap in a blanket, get real hot and sweaty, until the fever breaks. Usually I fall asleep during this stage. When I wake up, if the fever has broken, that means the body is now winning and I will soon be better. Influenza does not like heat, it likes cold.

I've been there many times, about once per year. For coughing I take a nice hot bath once a day, and let the steam eas my cough.

I also take 3000mg vitamin C each day when I first see symptoms start. You can split it into 2 doses: 1500mg in morning, 1500mg at lunch. For getting rid of viruses, echinacea also works for me.

[kageri]

The cold does not make you get sick. Scientifically no difference has been found in people who were exposed to a cold virus and then got cold versus people who didn't get cold but still got ill. While virus and bacteria like cold weather better just being chilled for awhile is not the same thing.