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Thread: How should I get closer to this girl?

  1. #1
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    Oct 2009
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    How should I get closer to this girl?

    Hey there.

    I'm a 18 year old boy who is currently trying to get some tips on how to get closer to a specific girl.

    So, I first saw her 2 years ago, at school. She was about my age, and she had everything I could ever ask in a girl (I mean physically, since I had never talked to her and so). She is not the hottest girl on earth, but she is beautiful enough to get my attention while not standing out between all the other girls and have all the guys interested in her. I had never felt such a big attraction for a girl before, but since I was very shy, and never had any experiences with women, I got stuck and never tried to meet her. The only thing I did was to had her on hi5 (some type of myspace, wich is pretty popular where I live). Even adding on her hi5, I never had the courage to start an online conversation with her.

    The situation didn't change for the next year, until one day (January 2009; one year later), when she wished me "Happy Birthday" on hi5. The reason she said that to me I'm not quite sure, but I'm guessing it is because she was one of my school friend's best friend, and we were both in her birthday party (back in November 2008), altough we haven't spoken to each other then.
    It might not look like a big deal, but I got pretty happy with the situation, it just gave me the little bump I needed to get the confidence to talk to her, so I talked to her a couple of times on hi5, and managed to get her MSN contact. When I caught her online, I started a conversation with her, asking her stuff about school, and what kind of stuff did she like to do on her spare time. However, she didn't show much interest in the conversation... she was taking to much time to answer and giving me short answers. She said she had to go and left 10 minutes later. I gave up on trying to talk to her.

    Months have passed with us never talking to each other, untill the day, back in August 2009, when I started to get driving lessons: I saw her at my first lesson, she was having lessons at the same time as me, at the same school. I had never talked to her personally, face to face, so I didn't said hello, or even looked at her during class, and nor did she.
    One or two days later she started a conversation with me on MSN, about us having lessons together. I repplied to her, being as nice, honest and kind as I could be, and I managed to sit next to her in the following driving lessons, when we met and talked personally for the first time. We didn't have any interesting conversation or something like that, we just had normal and trivial conversations, but what I can say is that if I had a crush on that girl before, now that I have talked to her, I really want to know her better.

    We have no more driving classes, so I have no excuse for getting next to her again, but we talk actively on MSN: I just got into college, and she moved to a new school, so I usually ask her how things are going. We usually also talk about on how is going each other's driving licenses (we have no more classes inside a class room, but we still have the pratical lessons). She seems like she is enjoying the conversations, at least shes seems interested most of the times.

    Now, giving away my detailed current situation, I'm pretty much stuck on this, because I don't know how to get further than this online chit-chat.
    I want to get next to her personally again, but I'm pretty sure I'm not in the condition of asking her to a date yet. and although I doubt it, I don't even know if she has/likes someone already.
    She doesn't know how I feel about her, and although I want her to know how much I like her, I'm afraid she will not want to talk to me again if she knows.
    What should I do?
    Should I try to start having more close conversations with her on MSN?
    Should I ask her to a date imediattely, even knowing that she will probably say no?
    How often should I start a conversation with her on MSN? I don't want her to find me annoying.
    Like I said before, I have never had any experience with a girl before, so I'm pretty much clueless on how to do this, and any kind of advice is welcome.

    Lastly, I apologize for the large big pile of text, but I wanted to give as much information as I could before asking for advice.

    Thanks in advance.
    Last edited by LuisCMartins; 18-10-09 at 06:48 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2006
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    You've got to be confident first. It's not like she's going to eat you or something. She's just a girl, chill. I don't think you should ask her out on a date or something. Do you have her number? If no, take it first. Talk to her with confidence for some days and then ask her if she wants to watch a movie or something. Not a date, just like hanging out.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    No, I don't have her number yet. I remember asking her like some months ago, and she said not many guys had her number... I didn't insist and said it was ok. What did she meant by that? Should I ask her once again?

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
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    I'm thinking about asking her to come to the mall with me, because since we are getting close to winter, I would like to get some clothes, and would like a feminine advice.
    What do you guys think?

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
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    4
    Well first of all man, in MSN conversations talking about hobbies in spare time and school and things of that nature is a big no-no at first. Think about it, these conversations are so normal and boring and she probably hears it all day. You need to stand out and provide fun and adventure.

    Be kinda like arrogant... but in a funny way and tease her a bit, in a funny way... you can pretty much say anything as long as its not boring and common and your doing it in a funny way.

    As for asking her to the mall, that could work, but be sure to ask her in a way like this:

    "hey dude, I'm gonna go to the mall on x day just to do some shopping and what not, do you want to tag along?"

    Say it like that so she'll think you're a man who knows what he wants to do, and will do it regardless of if she's going to be involved or not.

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