My wife and I have been dating for 4.5 years and we've been married since June. We have been happy more times then sad. About a month ago I really started to pull away from her and "ignore" her (those are her words). I really hated my job (new management) and she was really busy at work so i was unable to talk to her about it. Instead of talking to her I turned to my "vice" which are video games and gambling. She said that I ignored her when I would play video games but they made me happy. We are both really busy with our grad classes and we only see each other two of the five week nights but we see each other every weekend. This went on for a little while and then one night we got into an arguement and she told me that she had kissed a co-worker. I was very jealous but I forgave her and I changed. I stopped doing anything that took time away from her and she was starting to really enjoy our time together. The next day I made her talk to the guy and tell him that it was all over. Before she left she told me that it was more than just one kiss that they had been playing soccer together and going out to eat. Also she told me that it was more than just a little kiss it was an actual make out but that was it.
I was changing the best I could but she was still giving minimal effort. A little over a week after the first conversation I noticed that two of our condoms were missing. I went to her work and confronted her about it. She told me that she had sex with her co-worker that morning after I left for work. She also told me that she had continued the relationship with him and that she loves him. She doesn't know if she loves him more than me but she does lust after him. When she gets home we have a conversation and decide to get a divorce. When we actually start to talk about spliting things up and leaving each other forever she gets really sad and decides that she wants to work things out. This goes back and forth for a few hours and I finally tell her that I have to stay somewhere else tonight so she has time to think. I stay in a hotel and I get a call from her saying that she wants to talk.
She comes to the hotel room and tells me that she was planning on telling me that she wanted a divorce but after seeing me she wants to work things out. She ends up staying at the hotel with me but I couldn't even cuddle with her for longer than 5 minutes because I kept thinking about her and him. The next morning we start talking and she still wants to work things out. She promises that she will change this time. She wasn't thinking about actually losing me and she doesn't want that to happen. I tell her that she has to talk to the co-worker and tell him that everything is over. She says that she will but when I tell her that she should tell him that it was a mistake she says that she can't. She claims that she doesn't want to bring up the past with him. I don't think that she thinks that it was a mistake. I asked her and she wouldn't answer the question.
Before you help me decide what to do remember that I love this woman. I have been through everything with this woman. I forgave her the first time and I am willing to forgive her this time. My question is, should I give her another chance? Will I ever be able to trust her again? If she did it once will she do it again when times get hard? What should my next move be? Thank you for reading this and I hope you all have a wonderful day.