Advice Needed please

[ccg26]

Hello everybody, I work a a chef in the Royal Air Force and I have known this girl for 2 years now that I work with. We have always got on well. But over the last 4 - 5 months inside I feel a lot more for her and I really just can't stop thinking about her. We always have a good laugh and a flirt at work. Always chatting on Facebook and now and then on the phone. I feel really comfortable around her, I like her presence and she makes me laugh and always happy.

Last friday I was out down the local with her and a few other mates. Someone from work asked me if I liked Kirsty as we seem to get on so well. I replied, yes I do like her very much. Then this person decided to drag Kirsty in the girls toilets and she said that I told her I love her. Kirsty came out of the toilet and she told me what had been said and I said to her that I never said I loved you, bet yes I do like you alot, we gave each other a hug and then just carried on with the night.

When I woke up in the morning all I had in my head was Kirsty and how much I like her. So I text her saying that I really like you and have very strong feelings for you. I never got a text back for around 2 hours so I text her again aplogising for making myself look like a tit. She then text back saying dont be silly you have not made yourself look like a tit.

The next day at work she asked me if everything between us was ok and that I was not going to act funny around her at work. So I said of course not and to be fair on the out side everything has just been just fine. But inside its really killing me.

We still chat all the time at work, and then on the phone and Facebbok chat int he evening. I really dont know what she is thinking.

Obviosly gossip has got around the kitchen and Ive had people come upto me and say she does not want a relationship because, she has a child and thinks I wont like her beacuase of this ( She is a single mother) Also that she is a higher rank than me.

I don't wanna keep pressure rising her so she just dont speak to me at all. I really just need advice on how to go about it and what to do next. I'm at home now and she is at work, I really wanna text her but Idont wanna come accross like a stalker or anything. Just wanna make conversation.

She is 25 and I am 26

[whiskey10]

Hello there. First. Great news that you are in the RAF. My Uncle has just finished as Sqdn Ldr. Im training to go in the Royal Marines at the minute.

My opinion, is try to get her thoughts and opinions on you, and whether SHE thinks it could work, instead of what other people in the kitchen think. That way you can assure her that the point about her having a child is immaterial and that you would be more than happy to support her and help her out. (If that is true-Im sure it is). The rank situation will only be a concern to others, i think and that shouldn't interfere. Have a night out and chat about it over a meal, but like you say, dont try to force the issue. Just get her opinion on things. Instead of saying it out of the blue.
If it doesn't materialise, dont lose the friendship you have. (like the reason im on here)

[TAVS]

The ball is in her court. You need to let go. If she's interested, she'll come to you. Even if she's just concerned about being a single Mom, play hard to get, and if she really is interesting, she'll come to you.

Her current thoughts on you are clear, "not really interested." I think you need to let it go or you risk creating a big problem for yourself.