Too demanding

**kirroyale31** · 05-03-10, 03:51 AM

Hmmm....the gist of it is that we hooked up right away, he was new to the area, he moved in, works very part time....I have a small son, i'm a full time student, i work, etc. everything was great at first (it always is)....and now that reality has set in, it's not so good. i realize that i made a bad decision, and i need my space with my son & my life. he wants sex all the time....ALL the time and a lot of the time I am just too darn tired for it. i find him extremely attractive, but i am just not interested in it anymore most of the time. the message that i get from him is that he is equating sex with love and when we don't have it then i get a huge guilt trip put on me. he says take care of your man...blah blah blah. i'm sorry but as a single mom, student, and worker, i don't have the time or energy to have sex 4 times a day. if we go one day without it, it's a disaster. i hate feeling obligated, because that causes more problems for me like not getting turned on. : ( he also acts not interested in my son & won't even do anything for him like get a glass of water or anything. help!

**girl68** · 05-03-10, 04:03 AM

To want sex everyday is a lot. And many of us simply cannot keep up. I mean multiple times a week is fantasic but to get pissy if you don't have sex ONE day. I'd tell him where to shove it.

**Gigabitch** · 05-03-10, 04:04 AM

Kick his ass to the curb. You don't owe him anything and you have a serious relationship imbalance. He treats you like a walking **** doll and you have GOT to give your son a better example than this.

**kirroyale31** · 05-03-10, 04:09 AM

I have just been feeling like such a friggin idiot for jumping into something like this so fast. I have never lived with anyone before aside from my now ex-husband and that was 3 years ago. I think that I have just gotten very comfortable and okay with just being on my own and don't want anyone to be putting any kind of demands on me physically or emotionally, ya know?! Lately he has just had this attitude like, "I'm so hot and you're so lucky that I am even here with you and your kid." The other night I made a point to really satisfy him & it still wasn't enough! I had the stomach flu the other night and he was still trying to get on me after I puked my guts out. I think i'd rather be alone and take care of myself when I have the need for some sexual satisfaction. i think i just needed to post here about this because i know its a bad situation and I am too embarrassed about my decisions to tell my friends whats really going on. sounds like i have some shit to take care of.

**VincenzoG91** · 05-03-10, 04:17 AM

He's a selfish, egotistical jerk. Dump him. And next time, don't be so quick to move in with a guy, take the time to get to know him first.

**Gigabitch** · 05-03-10, 04:22 AM

Everybody makes mistakes, kir. Everybody. Your friends are probably more aware of what a chucklehead he is than they're telling you. They'll throw you a party when he's out.

Is there any concern that he'll give you a hard time about it? It sounds like he has an overinflated sense of entitlement and might show his dark side when he gets the boot.

**kirroyale31** · 05-03-10, 04:28 AM

i don't think that he has the capacity to be physically violent or anything, his weapon of choice seems to be the guilt trip. He doesn't know anyone in this town doesn't have anywhere to go or a vehicle or anything....gees this just sounds even better the more i tell, huh?! but i guess that's not my problem to worry about how he'll take care of himself. i think i have been too nice -- obviously.

**Gigabitch** · 05-03-10, 04:39 AM

He'll be no worse off than he was when he arrived. Nothing to feel guilty about.

**doppelgaenger** · 05-03-10, 06:09 AM

Tell him to buy a fleshlight.

**kirroyale31** · 05-03-10, 07:02 AM

I'm assuming you mean "flashlight", since he'll be sleeping in the woods.....

**davidtorres** · 05-03-10, 07:03 AM

You should leave him if youre not happy.

**cmacattack1** · 05-03-10, 07:07 AM

A fleshlight is a pocket pussy that you "do it yourself" with. Saw one in person. Really freaked me out.

Agreed with all of the above. He's probably gotten away with the guilt trips for far too long and he continues to get away with it with you. I cannot believe I used to think that it was the best way to get my ex girlfriend back with me. No guilt trips will ever work for anything productive like a relationship. "Its a duty to please your man?" What a jackass.

**doppelgaenger** · 05-03-10, 07:13 AM

A fleshlight is a sex toy for men. It's quite popular actually. The reason for the name is the discreet shape it takes, making it look like an innocent flash light, but really, it's quite naughty.

That should help him out. Tell him to get one. Even if he doesn't, he'll probably leave you, which is what you want.

**dewilliams2** · 05-03-10, 08:53 AM

The fact that you say he isn't interested in your son would make me tell you to lose the guy. Because where is the relationship going? Are you just having fun?...I'm guessing your looking for something more permanent and your son is a large part of your life and he doesn't like or pay attention to that part of your life then it isn't for you.

**SirWagginston** · 08-03-10, 04:19 PM

Are you exaggerating with the 4 times a day bit? That's just a whole lot of sex!

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