Help Plz!

[vHaTcHeT]

My girlfriend decided she did not want to go out with me anymore a few days ago. She told me she did not want to be commited to someone right now. She told me she wants to not claim eachother,but not see other people as well. And she still wants to mess around and have sex. Now in my opinoin I do not see why we broke up then. She has been hurt alot and doesnt trust many people. How do I show her I love her and she can trust me so I can have her back as my girlfriend. I really want her as my girlfriend so i have assurance shes mine. Please help. Thank you

[vHaTcHeT]

I think i wasnt clear on something....She wants to go out with me but doesnt want to claim someone. So we deicded not to go out..but we WONT see other people at all.

[Curlz]

Well it sounds to me like your going out! Maybe you're just moving a little too fast and she wants to slow it down a bit. If she isn't chasing someone else, still wants to be with you, then I don't think that you have anything to worry about if you slow down. As you said, she's been hurt, she is doing her best to learn to trust again.

[swimmingNreverie]

Well, if she still wants to have sex, I don't think she's too concerned with slowing it down.

From a girl's point of view, the way your relationship is right now is not good. You need to talk to her and explain that if you're going to go through the motions, then there's nothing wrong with putting a title on it. Its not going to hold you back anymore if you've both already decided to not see other people.

See, even though she's not seeing other people, if she can tell herself "Well technically he's not my BOYFRIEND" then nothing is going to prevent her from falling for someone else while she has you to play with, and then instead of saying "ok we can put a title on us now." instead its "cya!"

i mean, not necessarily, but the way she's not putting a label but still going through the motions is pointless if she cares about you, and could have a hidden reason that you're not seeing. If you honestly believe its because she's scared of being hurt, then you just need to sit down with her and have a heart-to-heart and let her know you'll be there for her and she can trust you.

[squirrley]

I agree with Swimming here...I havent been around to post much, but this one, well Id either talk to her or end it completely. As much as you care about her, dont let her walk on you here. Youd be giving her the green light to have other relationships going on without your knowledge, and shes gettn some action from you on the side-yea Id say this is a friends with benefits going on...no can do!

Im not suggesting you give ultimatoms, theyre a no no for me. But you need to figure out what YOU want for yourself. IF you think you can handle being friends and just have sex, then by all means, but from a million others who have expressed this situation-it doesnt work.

How long were you guys going out for anyway?

[French056]

Strange situation. Does you kiss eachother when you meet up ?

Yeah how long did you stay with her ?

[mildwild]

Ask her what she wants, clearly defined, and if you can give it to her then do so. If it would hurt you too much, walk away.