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Thread: how do you approach a pretty girl in a public place?

  1. #1
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    how do you approach a pretty girl in a public place?

    I've always been shy around girls. I want to break that barrier by getting a girlfriend. But I need pointers that would help me to not fuk up.

    so tell me, is talking to an attractive girl like batting average? you talk to 4 and 1 of them expresses genuine interest in return? Rejection is very intimidating to me.

    What works for you when a guy approaches you and tries to get to know you?
    Last edited by yaganon; 18-09-09 at 06:26 AM.

  2. #2
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    Come on women, answer the man. Well as a guy you're gonna get rejection all the time. I bet guys like Brad Pitt and Eric Bana were rejected too before they became stars. We all get rejected. Getting a girl's interest from a stranger is like auditioning for a movie, if you fit the part then you got the gig.

    Anyways, I stop approaching women randomly cuz it never worked for me. A approach works for me in a place where I'm sure I'll see that girl again;gym, bowling alley, movies or Starbucks. This places people just have a certain time and day to come back. So now since most likely this is true, the both of you have something in common right? If you have something in common,then you have something to talk about. If the girl finds you interesting she will continue to talk and answer your questions.

    I got like 5 friends(girls) at the gym now and it all started while they were on a machine and all I had to do was say,"May I work in with you"? For those that go to the gym and heard that line before even from a guy, it just means if I could use the machine while your rest in between the sets. At that point, you start asking questions like,"How long ago did you start coming to this gym"? But you don't want to sound cocky or like a gamer. Simply be friendly and act like your finishing your sets is a big deal. If the vibe looks good and you both are done with the sets, just tell her thanks and "we'll see you around" by her name. Most likely the next day she will say Hi and if she does, its on like donkey kong.
    To be or not to be?

    Is that the question?

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    I work at the jewelry counter at kmart and I get hit on by guys all the time. 1/100 times is he cute. Mostly black guys that hang their pants down to their ankles or balding middle aged men. Once I was standing on a ladder to change a sign and a REALLY old man (like 90 ) turned around staring at my butt and was like "damn girl!"

    Basically I think it's so retarded when guys flat out say Im cute or something like that. Its embarrassing and puts me in an awkward situation. Let alone ask for my number. F that.

    I think its cute when guys come around often and smile or something subtle like that. some odd amount of days later they come over to look at jewelry and make small talk and introduce themselves and leave it at that. When people do that to me I always remember their name. When they come back in and I say "Hi jacob" or whatever they come over and talk more. Thats the only way Id consider taking up a guy on his offer.

    thats just me though. Some girls will do anything for a cute face.

    if youre not very attractive though you have to really work for it. Maybe scope out a depressed fat looking one and hope she has friends jk........ sort of.........

  4. #4
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    Most important tip: make sure your approach is welcome. If you can't catch her eye at all and get a second look, she doesn't want to talk to you. There is nothing more annoying to a pretty girl than some guy thinking that because she's attractive, she somehow owes him her undivided attention and that if she doesn't give him a shot, she's a stuck-up bitch, so be careful how you do this.
    Spammer Spanker

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    Quote Originally Posted by bloodtippedrose View Post
    some odd amount of days later they come over to look at jewelry and make small talk and introduce themselves and leave it at that. When people do that to me I always remember their name. When they come back in and I say "Hi jacob" or whatever they come over and talk more. Thats the only way Id consider taking up a guy on his offer.
    Its confirmed, find girls that you are sure you'll see them again at the same place, same time. Always be friendly and if you ever go to a jewelry counter, never ever say that your looking for something for your GF or Ex. Say its for your lil sister. The whole mom thing gets old quick.

    Hey Bloodtippedrose, this is out of topic question. What city you live in?
    Walmart hasn't taken over yet? There is one here at every street.
    To be or not to be?

    Is that the question?

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    I am a guy. Tell her something like that: "Nice earrings" She: "Thanks", You: "You are nice too" She: "Thanks", and you can tell from the gesture if she is interested or not, if there is spark, she might even ask you something in return, but if not, make up an excuse or ask/say something subtle, never get too personal.
    Don't expect anything.

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    Quote Originally Posted by boobaa View Post
    I am a guy. Tell her something like that: "Nice earrings" She: "Thanks", You: "You are nice too" She: "Thanks", and you can tell from the gesture if she is interested or not, if there is spark, she might even ask you something in return, but if not, make up an excuse or ask/say something subtle, never get too personal.
    I'm a guy too. I'm going to disagree a little with Boobaa. Don't start a conversation with a compliment about her body or anything attached to it. You think you are being nice, she will take it as a "hit." Earrings are probably remote enough to get away with, without setting off her radar but as a general rule, calling attention to her appearance as an initial comment is risky. As for saying she is nice too ... it's obviously insincere, and she'll pick up on that. How could you possibly think she is nice after one word of conversation?

    If you genuinely notice something other than her appearance that deserves a compliment, by all means go for it. For example: (noticing her organic chemistry book) "Wow, organic chemistry!! That's a really tough subject, how's it going for you?" or (seeing that she rode in on a mountain bike) "What a great bike! I love mountain biking!"

    One of my favorite places to meet girls is the supermarket. Think about it ... you can find out a sh*tload about her before the first word just by looking at her groceries. If she's health conscious, start the conversation about health food. If she's a fast food junkie, tell her how much you prefer the whopper over a big mac. If you're just looking for a one-nighter, pass on the pretty girl with Tampax in her buggy.

    Carl.

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    Walk up to her and say... Hi, How are you doing?
    What's the fuss?

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    Quote Originally Posted by carl1222 View Post
    I'm a guy too. I'm going to disagree a little with Boobaa. Don't start a conversation with a compliment about her body or anything attached to it. You think you are being nice, she will take it as a "hit." Earrings are probably remote enough to get away with, without setting off her radar but as a general rule, calling attention to her appearance as an initial comment is risky. As for saying she is nice too ... it's obviously insincere, and she'll pick up on that. How could you possibly think she is nice after one word of conversation?


    The being nice was meant for her appearance. What is wrong with that?
    There are two types of women -- the ones who are flattered, and the silly ones who are not.
    Don't expect anything.

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    Quote Originally Posted by boobaa View Post
    There are two types of women -- the ones who are flattered, and the silly ones who are not.
    Thats why just approaching one in a market and saying HI will not work. But when you come back and she saw you once, she'll start to remember about you and your all in her head whether you'll come around again or not.
    To be or not to be?

    Is that the question?

  11. #11
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    Actually we think you look sillier when you come up to us just talking. It's annoying and it makes us say to ourselves, "And what makes you think I want to talk to you?" That's why it's best to greet first and if she seems to be inviting the conversation... you proceed.

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    Women do like to be wanted and kinda chased after. I think honestly, the most attractive thing you could do is be yourself. Don't try to be tough, don't try to be what you think a "man" should be. Just be you. This way, you meet someone who is really into YOU and not what you're pretending to be! I say this, because this is what my ex always did and it drove me mad!!!

    Personally, I like a guy who can lay with me, watch girlie movies and cry hahaha. Sounds dumb, but it's true. I want a guy who is in touch with his feelings. To me, that is amazing and to DIE for

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    Just be yourself. But don't go right for the looks, don't get me wrong, it's nice to be told that your pretty. But it puts me, personally, right on the defensive (maybe from working in a bar for too long!). But if a guy just says something like, nice tattoo or how's your day going? It makes me much more comfortable.
    Actually, the other day a guy on the train asked me how my workout was because it was totally obvious that I had just left the gym, and we just had a nice little conversation until we go to his stop. Unfortunately for him I have a boyfriend, but that is the perfect way to approach a girl.

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    Quote Originally Posted by abejareina1989 View Post


    Personally, I like a guy who can lay with me, watch girlie movies and cry hahaha. Sounds dumb, but it's true. I want a guy who is in touch with his feelings. To me, that is amazing and to DIE for
    Yep, I've officially become that guy. Let me add that since I've been honest and open about that kind of thing, I've gotten a lot more girls, lol. Not really sure how that attracts them, but being in touch with your feelings as a male and watching chick flicks on occasion works for some weird reason. It doesn't mean be a puss, but have a sensitive side...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nice Lover Boy View Post
    Its confirmed, find girls that you are sure you'll see them again at the same place, same time. Always be friendly and if you ever go to a jewelry counter, never ever say that your looking for something for your GF or Ex. Say its for your lil sister. The whole mom thing gets old quick.

    Hey Bloodtippedrose, this is out of topic question. What city you live in?
    Walmart hasn't taken over yet? There is one here at every street.
    I live in tacoma, wa. note my lil "location" on the right side of my posts. Ive gotta be one of the very few on this site that use use that spot -_- There are 3 kmarts in tacoma and 1 walmart. the walmart is a drive and a half and even though i hear how much greater it is verbally from customers all the time, they still grit there teeth and come to our store because its closer and you can pay your sears card.
    And true, when people come up and say they're looking for a girlfriend my interest is automatically shut off


    Quote Originally Posted by boobaa View Post
    I am a guy. Tell her something like that: "Nice earrings" She: "Thanks", You: "You are nice too" She: "Thanks", and you can tell from the gesture if she is interested or not, if there is spark, she might even ask you something in return, but if not, make up an excuse or ask/say something subtle, never get too personal.
    I agree with Kat here. Its nice to hear but puts me on the defensive too. The first thing you talk to her about shouldn't be looks because it means you're looking for something superficial. Complementing her on something about her personality will get you a lot more brownie points.


    Quote Originally Posted by Kat14 View Post
    Just be yourself. But don't go right for the looks, don't get me wrong, it's nice to be told that your pretty. But it puts me, personally, right on the defensive (maybe from working in a bar for too long!). But if a guy just says something like, nice tattoo or how's your day going? It makes me much more comfortable.
    I agree that these more tiny come-ons are much more comfortable but I think thats because I hear them all the time. If you want me to be nice and have a generally nice opinion of you then they're a good start but if you want me to remember you, your attempt should be a little more unique

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