He's not possessive at all

**Hermione** · 22-04-10, 04:34 AM

Hello everybody,
I'm new here and I got a little problem and want some advice. I hope you guys can help me out.
The story is I know this guy online for a 3 years now but we haven't met in person yet. We made a promise that we'll decide the future (whether we're in for a serious relationship or not) when we meet in person and get to know each other. Though lately he always tell me how he love me and want to marry me. He's a nice guy and always encourage and cheer me up when I'm down.
The trouble is he's not the least bit possessive. I know I should be happy that he's not some kind of psycho but really it's quite alarming when he told me to enjoy myself with other guys if I want to just to be careful not to get pregnant or disease! Darn it I'm a virgin here.
Well, I just want to know what you guys think of this. Am I thinking too much? Is there really such a NICE guy?
Thanks in advance.
Herm

**Gigabitch** · 22-04-10, 04:36 AM

He's being reasonable. You're not. You can't decide any of these things until you meet in person.

And yes, there really are such nice guys.

**Hermione** · 22-04-10, 04:47 AM

So it's not wrong if I date another guy and have sex with him?

**Incognito** · 22-04-10, 04:47 AM

I think that if he were being possessive although not meeting you yet THAT would be creepy and a definite red flag. He's just being realistic in that he can't possibly expect you to be exclusive when you haven't even met yet. If you were going out then a lack of possessiveness (to the point that you wrote about) would be a problem.

**Hermione** · 22-04-10, 04:53 AM

What you said is right and my brain know that it's the realistic thing in this world but I can't get this feeling that he doesn't really care out of my mind. I'm from a culture that being with someone isn't only on physical level that's why I'm still a virgin on the age of 26. Maybe I should date a few guys to get a better view on how man mind work.

**Incognito** · 22-04-10, 04:58 AM

I'm just curious, but what culture are you from/part of?

**lahnnabell** · 22-04-10, 05:01 AM

Have you ever even just dated a guy? Dating does not equal sex. You don't have to sleep with a guy to keep him interested in you. In fact, if you find that the only reason a guy is interested in you is for sex, then you're better off without him. Don't feel like you have to take this guy's suggestion at face value. I think he was merely trying to show you that he's okay with whatever decision you make and he wants to give you freedom to pursue your own goals.

I do highly recommend dating casually. You don't know when you and this guy will be able to meet up and you're selling yourself short by staying tied to your computer. You don't have to commit to anyone, but it might be a nice confidence booster to see what's out there.

**Hermione** · 22-04-10, 05:01 AM

It's Cambodian and I'm an old school too.

**Hermione** · 22-04-10, 05:04 AM

I know what you mean, Bell, and no I'm not tying myself to him at least not 100%. I'm just not used to dating

I guess I gotta change that fact about me.

**Incognito** · 22-04-10, 05:18 AM

You're tying yourself to him more than you think if you've been talking to him via computer for over three years and aren't dating other people.

**xxazurexx** · 22-04-10, 05:18 AM

Does anyone meet in real life anymore?

It's way more fulfilling you know

**xxazurexx** · 22-04-10, 05:20 AM

Originally Posted by Incognito

You're tying yourself to him more than you think if you've been talking to him via computer for over three years and aren't dating other people.

I don't think it's normal...but I guess woteva floats ones boat

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