A good break-up,but I am still depressed

[debussy12]

I've dated this guy for 2 weeks and last night he told me that we shouldn't go out anymore.I was shocked at first, then started crying for almost an hour-in front of him. I had pictured that this could be a good long-term relationship, but now I realised that all is just my own thoughts, not anything mutual. He said there was no sparks between us, and the way he saw relationship was different than my point of view, he also said that I'm too young for him as a girl friend(18 vs 22)-he felt like he was an older brother sometime,which was not what he wanted. Honestly, I thought he was a very attractive guy, but I didn't like him that way until 3 weeks ago at a friend's birthday party that he was trying to flirt with me, and we finally kissed, which got me this strong feeling towards him. But why did he give me this feeling and turned away all in sudden? I know that i can't force anything to happen if that's not what he wants, and I'm on the positive track to get over him now, but it's just this little part of me that is always thinking about what I could have done that would have kept the relationship, and I just can't stop thinking about him. It seems like everything in my life is not going well right now. I don't know what to do.

[sazzya1987]

it's just this little part of me that is always thinking about what I could have done that would have kept the relationship

But did you truly do anything wrong in the first place? Why did you guys really break up?

I think if he doesn't want to carry on with a relationship with you then you can't do anything about that. You can't force him into a relationship if one doesn't want to commit. It takes 2 to tango.

Two weeks you say you have been dating, its a short time and it sounds like you have just got attached too quickly.

I think the best thing for you is to go out with friends, make your heart heal and move on.

[drano]

Once the dopamine wears off in a relationship you start to realise the chance of compatibility, like sazzy said it takes two to tango and if he couldn't think of a list of reasons to stay with you aside from the way your smile made him feel then the relationship may just not have been meant to be.

[Zach]

There are so many other fish in the sea. Try not to let this one get the best of you. You got this.

[debussy12]

thanks for the comments.I think what sazzya said,that I got attached to him too quickly,was the reason why he actually broke up with me. I didn't do anything wrong, but I guess I was quite emotionally dependent on him. I told him many things that I felt frustrated about and asked him for advice-because I thought that's what a boyfriend should do-but,alas,apparently our thinkings kind of went on seperate ways. Anyway, I'm not sad anymore,at least we are friends now.Eventhough part of me still likes him as a boyfriend,I figured that there is actually a lot of choices ahead so yeah gotta move on!

[fennimore]

I'm 24, and my current girlfriend is 19. I have to admit it's very difficult to maintain this kind of relationship. Age does matter. Sometimes I think she's too immature, but hey, wasn't I five years ago behaving the same way she does? It took me another five years of screwing up to get to where I am right now. What I'm trying to say is that maybe he did feel you were cute and all but a little too immature...? Did you ever do anything childish that seemed to have annoyed him somewhat?

[vashti]

Ugh! You CRIED in front of him after only dating for two weeks? Honey, have some self-respect!

Keep yourself otherwise occupied and you will be over him in no time flat. Two weeks is nothing. Next time, don't jump in with both feet so quickly. Not only is it extremely unhealthy for you, it scares the guys away, too.

[lesser]

debussy12, be glad it has been so little time.. he could have waited more..
anyway, don't feel bad about it. Be strong and think that it's for the best.