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Thread: Was he flirting with me?

  1. #1
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    Was he flirting with me?

    So I signed up for a gym membership and I had slight feeling one of the managers was flirting with me. This is what happened.

    I go in the first day and he’s the one who is going to do the fitness assessment on me. Nothing special here…no flirting going on. However, near the end, when he was going to choose a personal trainer for me, he asked if I had a preference for male or female, to which I respond neither. He told me that if I had to pick one, which would it be. I said male…”a cute one”, to which he laughed and asked if I had a boyfriend, and I said no. So we were conversing and at one point, I ask him if he’s a personal trainer, and he said no, but that right then he wished he would be. I replied with, “yeah…because you already know all the areas I need improvement on…” and he paused a bit and then said, “yeah…that too.” with a smirk on his face. I didn’t ask him any further. When I asked for a cute trainer, he also said that he was sorry but that he was the cutest one there, lol. So anyway, I go and do a short workout and I have to return to his office to pick up some paperwork. I take it and thank him, he asked if I was done and I said “ yeah, I just need to change and I’m leaving.” He said, “well, you can change and then come back for the paperwork.” I told him that it was ok and thanked him and said goodbye. So I change, and as I leave, he’s now sitting in the area where everyone comes in and out and once again we exchanged goodbyes.

    A week later, I’m doing my warm-up while waiting for my trainer and he shows up on the treadmill right beside me. We say hi and chit chat for a bit. He asked how things were with the trainer, and I told him really good, that he chose well, and that I was happy with the trainer. He replied with, “Im sure he’s happy too.” I just laughed nervously. We got to talking about our weekend plans and he shared a bit of personal information about his life. Then things got quiet and then he asked, “So, who’s the cuter one, me or (name of my trainer)?” I just laughed and said I couldn’t reply to that question lol. We continue talking back and forth a bit, and then he jokingly calls me a different name because I had forgotten his name.
    So that’s pretty much it. I passed by his office later and we exchanged smiles. So is it just wishful thinking or is he flirting a bit? Does it mean anything....because I know these guys that work at gyms seem to be big flirts!!

  2. #2
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    He's indicating he likes you, but he's not getting the same signals back from you. You are turning him away with your neutral non-answers. You probably have one last chance to ask him on a date, until he moves on. Many guys don't like girls with poor communication.
    Last edited by bulrush; 24-01-12 at 09:01 PM.
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
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    Agreed...communication is key.

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    Asking you if you have a boyfriend when he's known you for a few hours at most is pretty much a dead giveaway that he's potentially interested. So are pretty much all the other things you've mentioned as possibly being flirty. I agree with bulrush and CAM it sounds like you're not really responding to his flirting advances, he might have asked you out already if you showed a bit more interest. Maybe now you'll have to do the asking.

  5. #5
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    A relationship is where BOTH parties communicate what they want. This is important when you are trying to start a relationship also. You need to tell him point-blank either you are interested, or you are not, and step up your game, girl. (I know, it's not a game, that's just a phrase.)
    I have a long time interest in psychology, specializing in relationship dynamics for 30 years.
    (Please note, we give the best advice we can based on the information given in a post. For better advice, please include the age of all romantic partners.)

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    It doesn't get anymore blatant (with politeness and respect) than this. He seems like a straight shooter too. Text-book flirting. I would say ask him to grab a coffee or a protein shake (to keep it in the gym and business-like). Both will give you (both you and him) a short one-on-one and it also keeps the exit accessible in case you find out otherwise. All guys flirt, but this guy seems like he is definitely a direct approach - - - although he has been through the ringer before in a relationship or courting....How do I know this? Because he called you a different name when he realized you had forgotten his. Also he is a stand-up guy because he positioned himself in the lobby when you were leaving which means he wants to get into you head and make you think about him more often. Exposure exposure exposure. Reinforced by the treadmill appearance. GO FOR IT!
    Same song and dance.
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    Third date! Can't stop fate. Its time to take this thing we got to the next level.
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    Oh duh..........

  8. #8
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    Ok, thanks for the feedback. But, he's pretty much ignored me ever since. I have been going in peak hours and he's always doing something, so I guess he's just too busy to talk.

  9. #9
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    Why don't you go up to him to talk instead? Maybe ask him to grab a coffee together.

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