Over reacting?

[OH45103]

Preface: My husband purchased brake pads for my car 6 months ago, they have sat in the garage since then. A friend of mine works at a Honda dealership, which is what my car is so when I need maintenance on my car he picks it up takes it to.work and fixes things. Well today he picked it up called me and I said I need brake pads on my car and he can get them for his cost which was $40 and he doesn't really charge me for the labor, mainly the parts. The pads my husband bought were $80 and we saw them.in the garage a.month ago and he said oh yeah I need to take those back. So today I tell him that my friend is changing the brake pads for cheaper than we bought them so we can take back the old ones... He then tells me they only have a 10 day return policy and throws them in the garbage because "brake pads aren't changed that often so we will never need them". Then he says I'm inconsiderate and he can't believe that I had someone else do it knowing he had the part... Really in my mind i was just thinking well having my friend do them will save us money because he failed to tell me we were past the return date. He's so mad he a not really speaking to me and again thinks I'm so ungrateful. Is he overreacting or did I really mess up?

[searock]

Ask him why he told you "I need to take those back" a month ago, if he bought them 6 months ago and they only had a 10 day return policy.

I think he's pissed because you had another guy take care of your car, rather than him. Explain to him calmly that you honestly thought it was the best solution, because you thought he could still return the parts so it would have been a cheaper solution. Then step back and don't try to get close to him until he calms down and comes to you first.

[OH45103]

He claims he just found out we couldn't return them a week ago. So I said why didn't you tell me them?! And I explained I was just trying to save money but he just says my thought process should have been I know we have those so I should tell my friend no my husband will do them? I feel like its so petty I don't even know how to "fix" it... Ugh.

[searock]

Tell him that you didn't tell your friend that because you thought that it would make you save money to use his break pads instead. It's really simple, your husband is making up excuses to be pissed at you. Maybe he is jealous of this friend of yours?

[CoolStoryBro]

You just wasted $40 bucks , so your man has a right to be pissed. The honda dude sounds like he done you a big favour also. That job should have cost you about $150, so he obviously wants to sleep with you.

[OH45103]

That's what I thought. It seems so petty!

[OH45103]

Well I saw it as saving $40 because we could.return the other. He's an old friend and always worked on my car has nothing to do with sleeping with me.

[searock]

Do you think your husband is jealous of your friend? Does he think there is something between the two of you?

[CoolStoryBro]

Yeah searock is bang on here. Your man is jealous of honda dude. I reckon the op isn't telling the whole story.

[OH45103]

I wouldn't think so.. he's never made an indication that he even might be jealous.. he knows there nothing between us we've been friends since before I knew my husband.

[searock]

Well even if not jealous, there is definitely some rivalry between him and your friend. Maybe even just car-fixing related, who knows. I think there's nothing you can do except make sure that he understands the reason for your behavior (which was perfectly fine BTW, I would have done the same thing if I thought it would make me save 40 bucks). Perhaps you may try asking him why he is so angry - if there's something else that's bothering him? Ask him as calmly as you can.

[OH45103]

Yeah maybe I will try to see what the root of the problem is. I just wanted a little assurance I guess that my logic wasn't absurd. Thank you very much!

[CoolStoryBro]

Yeah ignore my great advice and listen to the resident bra burner.

[CoolStoryBro]

The root of the problem is he lost 80 bucks, and he thinks you are having an affair with the honda man.

[CoolStoryBro]

Btw, you should get the pads out the bin and stick them on ebay.