Best friend told the girl of my dreams that I liked her. Nothing happened!

[Smithx]

Hi. I haven’t been in here for a while so I guess I can let you know a little bit about myself before I start to tell my story. I’m 17, and a Junior in High-School. I care a lot about my grades (3.8GPA, but it seems like I don’t really work that hard for it). I have been looking for someone for so long now, that I can’t even remember when I started looking. I am not an outgoing person, I tend to know every problem I have and I try to fix it. I am not very social, but every time there is a discussion, I wish there was more for me to say as to make me not so much a boring person. I have no enemies in my school of almost 1000 kids, mainly because I mind my own business all of the time, and no one bothers me, or torments me like many of the kids in this school.

Over the past 2-3 years, I think I have found the one and only person in this entire school that understands me. Thinks like me, and sometimes acts like me. The only thing is, she is very outgoing, into school projects, and friends with everyone she talks to. Me and her have been ‘Kinda friends’ but more of an acquaintance throughout the years and recently she has been saying things like “Hi Brandon” when we pass in the halls and there isn’t a lot of people around. All I can manage to cook up is “Hi” and continue walking. We’ve known each other for over 10 years but really never ‘talked’ to each other until this year, even this year we still haven’t talked, its just small ‘hi’s’ here and there. She is so nice to so many people, it’s hard to think she’s talking to me for a reason. Maybe that’s because my very best friend is very good friends with her as well. I have nothing to worry about because my best friend knows I like this girl very much, and he has a perfect and loving relationship going on in his life now.

About 1-2 weeks ago, I gave her a cumulative of three letters. Each the same length and same format. She read each one, and my Best friend (Call em ‘X’) has her first hour and he said that the letter I gave her (The letter was under an anonymous name), made her brake down into tears because she never got a letter like I had given her before. I guess it was a good letter heh. Recently, I just told X that I liked this girl (This was after I had given her all the letters of course and I told him about 2-3 days ago, I brought him into a park after a band practice I was having (He’s also my band’s lead guitarist, while I drum), and instead of taking him home after practice.. I parked at the park pulled out the 3 letters I gave to Katie (copies) and he looked at me in disbelief. He was shocked, and happy at the same time. He goes to Katie yesterday “Katie I think I know who wrote those letters” and I could not believe how much she wanted to know. X kept it to himself and say he couldn’t tell her, (I have X in my last period with Katie, so we’re all in the same class). Yesterday is the day in finally two years I have decided to go through with Katie knowing the truth. Before the end of the day X said to her “I’ll tell you after school” and she goes “Please, please please just tell me now, I don’t care if everyone hears it. After class she jolted out of the door and X never saw her again to tell her that I wrote those letters. Later that day, Katie’s best friend (Erin) called X and he told Erin.. Erin hung up the phone called Katie and supposedly told her. X calls me back saying “Erin told Katie, she now knows the truth man”

I went to school today, hoping for a sign.. hoping for her to say something to me like “That was so sweet of you” or “I hate you”.. but instead she said nothing.. as if it was a regular day. And the 2 classes I have with her, she never said anything.. I had my head down all day, and I was crying my heart of (In secret of course but if I lifted my head up, I had a wall of tears falling down)..

Today was officially the worst day in my life.. I don’t know whether or not Katie just needs a little more time for this to sink in before she talks to me, or should I say something? Knowing myself the way I do, I wouldn’t say anything because I have kept this inside for about 3 years and now I am pressured into just openly talking to her about this. I say to myself “No” and I feel bad for not talking to her, meanwhile hating myself for not telling her, then I am compelled to put my head down, then I start to really hate myself and just drop into tears.. Which happened today.. is this the calm before the storm, or what? I don’t know how she feels, and I just can’t face her now to find out.. I open myself online to you all here, to see what you think I should do. Thank you.. every little bit helps.

[kaotic02]

highschool love... the good times. hah, alright man i know how you feeling.
now heres what you have to do. Ok man, i had a similiar situation. K now you are dying inside right. You want to know whats going on. So you HAVE to talk to her ok. You are gonna just go crazier and crazier everyday untill you know whether she has no interest in you, or she feels exactly how you do. It's simple man. Don't not talk to her just cause she wont talk to you. You could miss this opportunity to talk to her now and have it on your mind for the rest of your life. You will be going IF ONLY I ASKED HER! I know how nerve racking it will be to find out how she feels, but like they say the worst she can say is she doesnt feel that way. Now everyone fears rejection. I don't care who you are. You talk to her and tremble hoping not to hear the thing you fear most. "Im not interested". But man.... you gotta just go for it. I like to count to myself to 10 before i do something nerve racking. So the next time you see her or have the oppurtunity to talk to her. Count to 10 inside your head, and at ten just approach her. Just say these simple words "So did you get my letters?" After you do that, everything will be a breeze. YOU WILL NEVER KNOW UNLESS YOU ASK. DO IT AND YOU CAN MOVE ON WITH YOUR LIFE! DO NOT DRAG THIS FEELING YOU HAVE ON ANY LONGER. CONFRONT IT NOW MAN, YOU CAN DO IT!

[wwefan300]

I agree with Katic but i have a remedy that will help you. Think of her as a guy( i know stupid). Dont worry about thinking shes gunna reject you because even if she does she will still like you as a friend. To tell you the truth she isen't mad shes nervous you gotta talk to her think of it as this. No one is around and you ask her "why arent you talking to me did i do something." Dude if you think of her as a GF and all that then you will be nervous just think of her as a friend dont think of her as a GF.

[Smithx]

I guess I knew her since I was 7 (10 years ago)... I never knew this, she was the one who told me.. heh. She is very good friends with my best friend, and my best friend knows about it. He knows that I feel like just dieing because I hadn't said anything yesterday. I will try to talk to her today I guess... Just hope I can find her walking alone in the halls because I don't think I can handle the public place.. Heres why:

When I told my best friend X, that night I stayed up from 12am to 5am on a school night, sitting in the rain getting pelted by high winds. Trying to forget that I told him or just to ease the pain. And I told him in a private place, alone from everyone else.. and I still turned deep red and was shaking like I had never before.. Now I get that same nervious feeling when I am just NEAR KT. Telling her is one thing, but telling her with 100s of people going passed you in the halls, or the isolation of 30 kinds in a room with you... I am normally a very quiet person, and this is just too big a task.. If she brought it up, I could easly tell her everything.. but in a somewhat private setting.. if we are in a hall alone, or a certain part of the room when no one is paying attention sure.. but the other day.. she had said ONE thing to me.. and I still don't know what she ment. We are having a in-class group project now in my 4th hour class. The project groups are in groups of two, and the amount of work each groups get vary on their current grade in the class. I, of course have an A.. so the work level is higher.. anyways, she says this to me in my last hour:

KT: Brandon? Do you have a study hall tomarrow?
Brandon: Yea, but it's third hour
KT: Nono, I mean't in Mr. Jones's class (4th hour)
Brandon: Actually, we are so far behind that we wouldn't have time to work on our other homework.
KT: Oh ok

That was that.. nothing else.. Could she have possibly wanted to talk to me tomarrow when everyone was working on their homework? Or most likely something else?

[Ratfish256]

Ok this my sound a bit hard. But have you tried asking her out yet? I mean it may feel difficult but you should really man up and do it. Think if she says no you can move on and if she says yes, wel you know the deal. The best thing to do would just flat out ask her out.

[kaotic02]

you need to stop trying to analyze everything that happens between you and her. You need to hurry and talk to her and figure everything out so you arent sitting around wondering anymore. seriously, it sounds like its gonna be hard to do, but once you talk about it you will feel better. Wondering and trying to analyze everything that happens between the two of you is only going to make you feel shittier cause you will still be guessing.

[Smithx]

Your right.. Hmm.. Well, to feel better about myself.. X is going to talk to her tomarrow (They have a group project in their first hour class and they are partners). Instead of going out to lunch, they are both staying in and going into the library to work on this project.. he said he will talk to her about how I feel and what I've been talking to him about everyday online.. if the discussion were to ever arise.. i will open myself up to her and tell her everything.. Just don't know when that moment will arrive..

[kaotic02]

call her? you sound like you arent tryin to confront her about everything. Don't have your friend do it, you will still have many gaps and unanswered questions. I'm telling you man, you need to just do it yourself.

[LightOn]

Smith,

You seem like a very intelligent fella, but you also seem very uncomfortable with the situation you are in. X shouldn't be talking to her about you, KT is your prerogative, not his.

When your studying for a test and you are stumped, don't know what to do, ya look deeper into the book, you flip a few extra pages. Well KT is this book and you are not going to pass this test if you don't get in that book.

I have suggestions for you but your gonna have to be specific with what your letter to her contained, such as questions was there any questions for her? This is very important. If there was, what were they?

[Smithx]

The letters are a full length of paper in 10.5 font. There was 3 letters.. and a forth on a half sheet of paper. Too long to post here... If you want them sent to you.. I can have that happen

[LightOn]

The letters are a full length of paper in 10.5 font. There was 3 letters.. and a forth on a half sheet of paper. Too long to post here... If you want them sent to you.. I can have that happen

No I don't need them, but again was there any questions to her in them?

[Prodigal]

Now, I know what everyone is saying is really hard. You're thinking, it's easy to say it but to be you and to actually go there and talk to this Katie? It's just so hard, isn't it? I think all of us know that feeling. I really, really don't think that this X should be talking to her; like LightOn and others have said, you should. Nobody knows the way you feel better or even remotely close than the way you do. You apparently know, and have much to say; you said you wrote her three long letters.

Just because she didn't respond to you doesn't mean that her reaction wasn't positive. Maybe she feels the same way as you. I mean, it's definitely something that would be awkward to bring up, wouldn't it? Especially since all the communication has gone through word of mouth.

You HAVE to bring it up. You don't know if it's good or bad, but it's becoming bad because you're torturing yourself when it may not even be bad. You have to take initiative, man. It's one of the hardest things in the world, especially when you're quiet and introverted (I am a bit, especially in front of strangers). I see it this way. If you really want her, you're going to have to go out and get her. It's not your friend who should be talking to her, or her friend. YOU have to get out there and do it. You've taken the step with the letters, now's the time to go all the way. Good luck, man.

[Smithx]

Okay. Well I stopped X, err Xavier, and he won't say anything now I guess. I told em how I felt, and I still felt really bad about Katie's best friend telling her I wrote those letters instead of me. And now, if Xavier tells her how I am feeling right now, then I will just come to regret that too. Xavier thought that maybe we could all go out soon and have a little fun. (Me, Xavier, Katie, my bass player, and Katie's best friend, we've all gone out and done stuff as a group once or twice). If we were to all go out, I could then easly talk to KT because we will be in private a lot longer so i could say what I want to say. Thenagain, if we all have to request off.. that would be two weeks away.. two weeks, I can't handle.. I wish i could just be invited to her home, or somewhere with a bench in private.. sit down at a table and tell her everything..

[LightOn]

SmithX,

LOL, last time. In your letter to KT, did you ask her any questions?

[Only-virgins]

Dont listen to these people Smithx. Do not EVER talk to her. Instead do nothing and then after a few years when you regret it you will try and beat yourself to find out were she is and what she is doing. You will try and find stupid hobbies, work, and activities to keep your mind of it but you wont anyways at the end. You will slowly develope depression and anxiety while going crazy all at the same time. Hey...I mean..come on..going crazy is fun. Who am I kidding..if your feelings are anywere near as strong as mine were to the person that I missed my chance with then you will suffer if you do not talk to her. Talk to her..you sound like you have at least started conversation with her before.