Falling again
And again I fell, sinking in the darkness, loosing the will.
Again, the good days are over, and crying is what left.
I can't stand this notion,
The mist surrounding my future,
Blocking my ability to see.
My life is going on,
But I'm not present.
I don't the steps, they are leading me.
I don't make a choice, cause nothing matters.
Leaving in a memory that won't let go.
A memory of happiness? of wholeness?
I'm not even sure.
Was I really pleased then?
Or was I pretending, knowing it's the last chance.
The last chance to feel I am human.
That I will be right, happy, striving for success.
A human is someone that sometimes falls, but in the end bounce back.
So maybe I am not.
I have no aims, no direction.
Not capable to love, don't deserved it from on one else.
Have nothing to share, nothing that worth receiving.
Never good enough, never smart enough, never pretty.
Nothing that will want you to approach,
Everything that will make you disconnect.
Lonely and shameful, sad and empty.
I am nothing worth mentioning.
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