Dating tips for a shy male

[Atticus]

Hi, i'm kinda shy, not very confident, thin, and just a bit feminine ( I love poetry and i hate football...i love romance and i think loose sex is stupid). I was wondering what i should do to get more dates with girls....they almost always say no. I havent had a date in 2 years. SHould i pretend to be more confident or wait for a girl who likes shy guys? Should i try to become more tough or stay they way i am??? Any information would help.

Thanks.

[FratBoy177]

You have to weigh your feelings.. which are more important to you? The fact is, ALL women like a confident man, no matter how you look at it. You shouldnt have to PRETEND to be confident.. that should just come naturally. Think about it, would you rather go another 2 years without a date, or would you like to pull a woman into your life?

Also, how have you been going about meeting girls? A guy like you shouldn't be out at bars or clubs or anything like that because the women at those places are looking for outgoing, strong guys, which you claim not to be. Also, how important are a girl's looks to you? The best bet for someone like you to meet a girl is to find a place where people go with similar interests (poetry, you said?) Try a bookstore or a poetry reading at a coffee shop, and strike up a conversation with another shy-looking girl about a relevant topic about poetry.

[Atticus]

Really? ALL women? thats very sad. I was hoping that wasn't the case...

By the way, a girls looks mean nothing to me...i only seek the beauty on the inside (really!)

[FratBoy177]

Yes... ALL WOMEN. Would you be attracted to a girl who thought she was the ugliest dumbest least attractive girl in the world? Of course not, unless she looked really good. No girl wants to be your guidance counselor, they want to be taken care of. You ever watch Sex and the City? You should, it has done wonders for my dating life.

[Velcrez]

I'm in a similer situation as Atticus. I have a rather loud and in your face group of friends that I hang around with. I am almost the exact opposite, and it is hard to make much of an impression on girls at all with them around. I know it spoils my chances with them around, but if I ever go out on my own I always feel so lonely and out of place.

[BuzzLiteBeer]

you sound like me...but i'm not so shy anymore (i'm always going to be an introvert, but i'm more loose right now).

It is absolutely true that physical feature should not be the main things that attracts you to a girl. If you like someone, be yourself and talk to them and listen to them. If you "act" tough, you'll only get girls that like tough guys...and end up having to "pretend" the rest of your life.

NEVER pretend...it messes you up big time, but being more open and less shy is not pretending.