moving on... seriously.

[Iwanttobefree]

OK, I've posted several times about the same thing. Some say that I'm just infatuated, but I don't feel that way at all. The answer is suppose to get busy and forget about her, but I can't do that. I haven't been myself for quuuuuuuite a while now. I'm a lot quieter, and less outgoing. You guys (ehh girls) make it sound so easy to just immerse yourselves in various activities and apparently that works really well, but not for me. No matter how busy I am, she's always at least in the corner of my thoughts, even during moments when everything seems perfect (if anyone knows what I mean...).

HELP?

[Aeradalia]

I remember when I was learning how to type.. that I would constantly pay attention to where I positioned my fingers.. try to remember which letters were close by... and though that was expected at the beginning.. it just slowed me down as I progressed with my learning.

Every now and then I would become so immersed in whatever I was typing (chatting.. writing a story.. etc) that I would forget about where my fingers were positioned... I was just typing --- no real thought involved in the whole process.

It wasn't until I 'realized' that I was typing without paying attention to this that I would mess up --- I was messing up because I was 'thinking' about typing... instead of just doing it -- focusing beyond it --- on the story.

Getting over someone is the same way. At the beginning you are focused on trying to keep yourself distracted. You focus on whether or not you're forgetting the person... you focus on what you will use as a distraction next... but you aren't forgetting about the person, because you are focused on trying to forget them.

Eventually you make these 'distractions' so much of a habit to the point to where you become immersed in the activities that you 'forget' to forget the person --- you're just having fun with whatever it is that you're doing.

However, if you focus on the fact that you have forgotten 'forgetting' her... then you will mess up.

Hope you understand... if you want a distraction to work.. you have to dedicate most of your attention to it--- become lost to the fun of it, and stop focusing on whether or not you are actually forgetting her.

[Iwanttobefree]

Sometimes... often times, I can't find the energy to do anything.

Before all of this, it was all different.

[Iwanttobefree]

Right. So I have all of my morning classes with her, and there's no way to transfer to another class.

I would if I could, but I have to sit across from her and listen to her talk and laugh.

I know that the best way for me to get over this is to 1. stay away from her and 2. have something fun and not stressful to occupy my mind

Well I have NEITHER of these right now. My courseload is freaking MONSTER, and boring, so my mind is always, and I mean ALways tempted to wonder.

Any way around this or do I have to push through it any way I can? It seems like a dead end to me no matter what. Things are just not working out whatsoever with school, studying, sports, friends... her. I just want to get the **** outta this place