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Thread: Friendships after marriage

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Dec 2004
    Posts
    1

    Friendships after marriage

    Hi, I am single and have a girlfriend. I have a couple friends that now are married with children. Since I very rarely get to see them anymore, although we're all still very good friends, i suggested that we start in 2005, an annual trip. We used to go to Vegas 3-4 times a year, and i realize that will never happen again, and i don't expect anything remotely close to that at this point. Every one of us is in a relationship and it would just be a trip to hang out and have fun away from it all for 1 weekend. Friday night after work to Sunday afternoon. 1 of them has a wife that does not trust him even though i've known him for more than half his life and would never cheat on someone even if Pam Anderson begged him for sex. His wife just has her own issues because people in her family have done dirty deeds like this in the past. The other 1 says he works a lot and is afraid he'll miss his family too much if he's away that long. 1 weekend in 2005 is all i'm asking! They say when I'm married and have children I'll understand, however my girlfriend thinks it's a great idea and I can honestly say that if we were to get married and have children she would not only allow and approve such a thing, she'd encourage a trip once a year for 1 weekend with my best friends. Am I wrong in being annoyed as can be with my friends for not wanting to plan an event like this? 1 weekend of their choosing in 2005! My other 4 friends (1 of which lives in another state and another that just recently ahd his 2nd child) are game if there is a plan and enough notice. 1 weekend is all i'm asking for! That seems reasonable to me, what about you? Suggestions or advice??? This is strictly for bonding time. Not to go to strip clubs or do drugs or hookers. They're not like that at all.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    London, England
    Posts
    261
    I think you just say - fine, I don't understand how you feel and would really like to see you all just for one weekend but if you can't then that's life, I'll see you ____" or something to that effect. Then go with the other people and have a blast anyway.

    It's a shame that they can't make time for some mates - I hope no matter how settled down I'll always be able to make that kind of time for my mates because we've been through so much together it would be a shame to lose what we have.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2003
    Posts
    2,569
    It might actually be better to have a "guys night" once a week or every other week instead of one weekend trip a year. You'll see each other more often, stay better friends, and the wives will worry less about one night than a weekend in Vegas (Which, once again, is known as "sin city")

    Alexi

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