He has Loved her for 11 years and she is STILL breaking his heart!! When will it end

[paracelsus82]

My boyfriend for 6 months, and friend for 3 years, has been in love with this girl since they were 13 or so...She keeps him on the back burner for when her life doesnt work out anymore, she can go running back to him. He seems to always take her back....Apparently the last time they were together, he thought he had finally gotten her (them) to where they needed to be. I was happy for him, just want to see him happy. Well, about November last year she had a friend get outta jail, and when (my friend) went home that night, she had the other dude MOVED IN! So, my worrie is, that when she decides she doesnt want the other dude anymore, do I lose MY boyfriend?? He still talks to her almost daily.... I do try to emotional prepair myself...but I do love him and I hate to see this over and over. It sickens me I want to be his ROCK and show him that love doesnt have to hurt...how do I do this? Just sit back and be there when it happens again? Is he doing me the same way she is doing him? My heart has an elephant on it and I desperatly need it removed.

[Yggdrasil]

I suggest you dump him. It's pretty obvious he is absolutely not commited to you, but to some childhood fantasy in his mind.

As long as he doesn't get over that childhood fantasy, you have no future with him besides being his ****buddy and companion against loneliness.

To me it seems that you want more from a relation than what he gives you.

So.. wake up, see what's going on, accept it, and move on.

That's in my opinion the best you can do, for the both of you.

[Mish]

He is to you what she is to him (They are both evil)

[IndiReloaded]

Don't go breakin mah heaaaart....

[paracelsus82]

That sucks =( I hate to give him up so easily, he really is a great guy....

[carl1222]

That sucks =( I hate to give him up so easily, he really is a great guy....

Maybe ... but you'll always be second in his heart. Sorry.

Carl.

[Chaz3]

Ya know, if you dump him and let him know why bluntly. It could go either way. You could get him to figure out he does really love ya (won't be over night). At that point if he comes to that realization, it won't be a problem to drop the old trouble. But don't hold hope, just move along, if something does come up down the road, take it day by day. And make sure to protect yourself and stand up for all that you are.

[paracelsus82]

Yes...and I DO deserve to be Number 1 I guess when a door shuts a window shall open somewhere

[paracelsus82]

Thats good chaz...I like that approach

[Chaz3]

Just remember it takes time. And the recipe for being happy now and down the road is the same. It doesn't matter if he is down the road or not. When its broke off, focus on you and be confident in yourself. Doing that will allow opportunities either old or new to show up. And don't worry life's always good, regardless of what's going on, because your still alive.

[IndiReloaded]

I agree with Chaz. Either way, you will feel better by respecting yourself.