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Thread: Biggest problem

  1. #1
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    Biggest problem

    UPDATE: THIS POST HAS BEEN DELETED, FROM AN ALREADY SUGGESTED ANSWER...........



    Last edited by Undisclosed; 30-07-03 at 02:42 PM.

  2. #2
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    Let me relieve you first of all by saying two things quickly first off:
    1) It is OKAY for you to feel this way.
    2) You are in Love my friend. There is no way around it.

    Now I will elaborate on each and more.

    First of all, you must understand, Love has NO boundaries. It doesn't discriminate. It doesn't pick those who are compatible and make them fall in love. It can pick whoever it wants. It doesn't concern itself with social classes, races, religions, family scenarios or geographical distance. It doesn't see colors. Once the Cupid has struck you --- you're in for it. It's time for you to come to this realization. You are in LOVE. Not a childish love either. This is a passionate love. I know what you mean by not being able to remember her face. I've had the same problem in the past. I fell in love (and still am, but we are no longer together) with a girl. It was love at first sight. I was struck by the Thunderbolt. It electrified me --- and still does.

    Cursed by this love you cannot fall in love with any other girl. You have to give it the time out of your life... you have to wet its beak. What I am trying to say is you have to see if loving her is feasible. You MUST start off by trying to be her friend. Once she see's how you are much more caring and loving then her boyfriend, she will take the right step next. She is her own individual and she has the right to choose who she is to be intimate with. I am not saying, go into this looking to bunt the boyfriend out of there, no. I am saying, get into her life, and show her how much you care for her, and how much you want to love her. She will then make the decision for herself. She will choose the better of the two --- you.

    Let me be the one to tell you appearances can be SO deceiving. She may look perfect my friend, but deep down (however deep she has buried them) she has problems just like you and me. Insecurity issues, daddy issues, social issues, personal issues. Never forget, she is human, like YOU and like ME. If you can be a good friend to her, and make her trust you enough to tell you those problems (which I doubt she is telling her current boyfriend), you will then be good as Gold. Guaranteed my love-struck friend. It's guaranteed.
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

  3. #3
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    How can I be sure im more careing than her boyfriend? I've never met the guy.

    Also, I have been caring for her since day 1, just not too caring, I guess Ill push the envelope a little farther on that.

    She calls herself a retard, I really hate when she does that, I always come up with some clever way of going ''But as least...blah, blah, blah"... I never really said "Your not a retard and its stupid to think that way"

    Because 1: She thinks Shes stupid.
    Because 2: If I said this she probably would call her self more names, and i would be saying "your not..."this, or that... The whole time im talking to her, thats a bit too bold i think.

    My personallity changes everytime i get near her, I sit up, I listin attentivly, if somone gets up and says "Get me a drink" I tell them not to make her do it and they can get it themselfs.

    What about when shes not puttin her self down? How can i 'care' for her, rather than going "there, there", thats more like swimpathy to me.

    Her Freinds have been liking "Punk, Gothic" for a while now, I think shes catching on... She dosn't look like she wants to get into it, just wants to stay with the crowd, she mainly just downloads punk rock and wears black cloths, not go out and say "Im gothic, and the devil rules"....

    I still like her the way she is, even tho she has changed a little recently, least she dosn't but paint of her face, or write on herself all over.

  4. #4
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    My brother, listen to me closely. First of all you have to understand that if there is to be ANYTHING betweeen you two you are going to have to do one thing: Be yourself. There is no ifs, ands or buts. You got no way around it. You can't let her fall in love with a 'fake you.' Why you may ask ? Because you are going to have to be that 'fake' person to keep her. You don't want that. You want to be yourself. You want her to love the real Johnny (I don't know your name), NOT the Johnny who is acting like someone else so Elizabeth (once again, I don't know)will fall in love with him.

    Don't ask "how do I care for her more then her boyfriend." You don't need to worry about him. You are going to be YOURSELF around her from now on. Let Johnny's true love shine through, and if you two were meant to be together THEN you WILL be TOGETHER.

    Be confident in yourself, and be confident in your love for her. Love conquers all my friend, but is has to be true love.

    Your brother,
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

  5. #5
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    Yes.. I am myself... I have been myself for 3 years around her, altho it is very rare that i see her in person..

    Most contact is through Aim.
    About every few months I see her.

    She may be thinking that this "Step Cousin Relationship" is the Fine line between us.. I have long thought that also, but i realized my step mom did not have to marry my dad and I still could know this girl today, but just not as much.

    I am myself around her, for the small exception of the feelin i get when im near her, its like somthing is inside me telling me to 'not be myself'... I can get that of my chest, but i hate silience when talking to her, and I just stand there and she plays her violin or just stands there also... I cant talk to any girl out there, except for her.. I dont know why, I just cant walk up to any girl (be it from school, or just outof school) and say whats up...

    Its only the girl i love that I can talk to freely, well almost freely anyways.

    Im really never alone with her when i see her... I have many other step cousins to, like 8. She has a brother also, an 11 yr old.. my brother is 12 and those 2 get along fine.

    I see her often at family get togethers and theres people all around me.. I think i would feel more confortable talking to her alone... thats probably why I can let almost anything out on aim. (Im alone and so is she).. I told her that i cant let out my feelings in real life, then she goes and tells me that she can talk about anything with anyone, well except for 1 thing that 'i' and only I know about her.. That "thing' is not relivant for you to know and it affects nothing.

    Yesterday when i was talking to her, I somehow slid into a Relationship conversation.. but nothing about me and her, but she says she wants to get me a G/f... I really would like to get one on my own, in fact its not her that should get the girl.. I sould and I should tell her that i need to have her, instead of her friends. But I have never had a G/f and especially in this type of relationship........
    Last edited by Undisclosed; 30-07-03 at 02:16 AM.

  6. #6
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    Any other comments that would futher help?

  7. #7
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    uhhh... yeah..that is very helpful. raverboy
    ...this is just my perspective on the situation...

  8. #8
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    How can you expect further comments on a deleted post? Doesn't make a whole lotta sense to delete everything you write, are you embarassed?
    Heit ist mein taug.

  9. #9
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    Post edited for needless language and unnecessary hostility.
    Last edited by Zekk_T_Strife; 31-07-03 at 04:11 AM.

  10. #10
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    Woah... what the hell happened here ?

    Why all the hostility ?

    Why did you delete your post Undisclosed ? Did she read it ?
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

  11. #11
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    Yeah, that really came out of nowhere. I was just asking why he felt the need to delete all his posts. Touchy.
    Heit ist mein taug.

  12. #12
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    Norman Bates: She just goes a little mad sometimes. We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven't you?

    -Memorable Quotes from Psycho (1960)

    [url]http://www.imdb.com[/url]
    "I still find each day too short for all the thoughts I want to think, all the walks I want to take, all the books I want to read, and all the friends I want to see."
    - John Burroughs

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