The 1st message to someone on a dating site

[doug8787]

Does anyone have experience with dating sites and how they first introduce themselves to a girl?

I always have trouble with the first message showing interest that I would like to chat with the girl.

Anyone have any thought what the introduction message should be?

I usually say something like

"I came across your profile and thought you would be someone I would be interested in chatting with. If you are interested just send me a message back."

is that kind of lame?

[devonbrown]

That sounds like a generic message you would send to 4000 women hoping to get a response. Women don't tend to respond well to mass-messaging like that.

You have to put in some time with online dating. Take a look at their profile and talk about something they include in their profile. Relate it to something you enjoy or have on your profile. But show interest in the girl. Let her know that you are interested enough to try to talk to her and get to know her. Don't put the onus on her to look at your profile and decide if she wants to write. She has probably done that already if she has searched through the site. You have to give her more to respond to and a reason to respond.

Remember this - a lot of online dating is about marketing yourself. You are in competition for attention. If you don't do something to stand out, you will be passed by.

Also, many online dating sites have sections to have your profile reviewed, etc. That may help as well.

Good luck.

[doug8787]

That sounds like a generic message you would send to 4000 women hoping to get a response. Women don't tend to respond well to mass-messaging like that.

You have to put in some time with online dating. Take a look at their profile and talk about something they include in their profile. Relate it to something you enjoy or have on your profile. But show interest in the girl. Let her know that you are interested enough to try to talk to her and get to know her. Don't put the onus on her to look at your profile and decide if she wants to write. She has probably done that already if she has searched through the site. You have to give her more to respond to and a reason to respond.

Remember this - a lot of online dating is about marketing yourself. You are in competition for attention. If you don't do something to stand out, you will be passed by.

Also, many online dating sites have sections to have your profile reviewed, etc. That may help as well.

Good luck.

so something along the lines of

"Hey, I came across your profile and noticed we have the similar taste in music. What bands are you really into? Some of my favorites are " " " " " " " " " " "' . I see you are in school for " " " " ". Do you like college? Right now I'm studying "" '"" '' "'. "

Does that sound good??