need some help urgently

[tired91]

hey,
first some background. my girlfriend and I have been together for ten months. she's my first.. i'm like her 8th.. whcih gets to me sometimes but whatever im pretty much over it as long as she's just into me. we are both very serious about each other, we want to marry each other. we're both 20. and the way our culture works, we marry people rather than date. so that's why we're so serious.
so basically.. my girlfriend and i had gotten into a recent fight.. we've been fighting a lot recently. it's pretty bad. she usually crosses her limits, slaps me and stuff (who does that?), but we weren't talking after our last fight.. so i went over to my friends house to chill for the night. while i was there he was on facebook, and he knew we werent talking.. he saw her online. then i had an idea. for some reason i'm always afraid that she won't be loyal to me, so i decided to test that. bad move, i know. but im kinda glad i did.
so, basically, i told my friend to flirt with her (she and I have a relationship in which we understand that I wont talk to any other girls, and she wont talk to any other guys, especially to flirt and stuff, because we both believe that one cannot really be "just friends" with the opposite gender. hell, we both dont check the other gender out.)
anyway, while she was talking to my friend, we basically told her thru him that he liked her since the beginning and that he was always jealous of me, that i got her. and she said some very messed up things. that she's bored of me. that she's all his now. and that she's been hiding liking him while being with me, and theyre going to have to keep it on the downlow. while all this was going on, naturally i wsa heartbroken.. i was texting a friend at the same time, and because of my emotional state i told her that i liked her for a long time, and that i could tell she was the right girl for me. things like that. basically that i wanted to be with her.. i later realized i didn't and i told her i was sorry for that, that i was just going through something and i flipped.
then my friend called my girl.. she laughed in his face and told him that she was happily with me. i thought that was such a messed up joke. i waited for her to tell me what happened.she told me she had some messages to forward me but never did.. so i confronted her by telling her that my friend had felt guilty and told me everything.. then we started to fight. i lost all trust in her.. she did convince me that it was a joke and she was sorry that she even joked about that, that it went too far..and, while this was going on, i decided to be honest and told her about my conversation with the other girl.. she told me to text the girl saying her that i played her and i dont really like her then she'd be with me. as soon as i did, she told me nah, now you lost us both. so i flipped out. cussed at her, yelled at her, everything. then she swore she'd never be with me.
now.. shes telling me she'll be with me if i apologize to her in front of the other girl. and humiliate myself. and i know that if i hadnt done anything and i just had her conversation with my friend to go on, if i had asked her to do this, she would have said hell no.. she would not do the same with me.. this is the girl who i got disowned by my family for, who i fight for, who i never let anyone talk bad about. the thought of making her humiliate myself didn't even cross my mind.. i can't believe she's doing this to me. especially after i wrote that text to the other girl humiliating myself and her. why does this feel wrong? i know what i did was wrong, by cussing at her, and by talking to this other girl like that.. but didn't she do the same, that made me do this?
so basically i told her okay ill apologize to you in front of her.. i'll humiliate myself for you. BUT, in order for ME to get back with HER, i told her that she'd have to apologize to me in front of everyone involved in her conversation with my friend (my friend, her friend who instigated her flirting back, and me).and she has to tell her ex who she said she talked to while she was with me and kept it from me (as a lie to make me jealous), that she doesnt like him and not to bother her. because i just want to know if she'd do the same thing to make up a wrong she did to me like shes making me do. she says that i should treat her good and do this regardless.. while i shouldn't expect her to treat me good or do anything in return. i do believe in unconditional love but it should be the same from both sides otherwise it doesn't work.
i dont know what to do.. any help?

[steviej]

You're both to immature for a relationship. Quite simply neither of you are ready for marriage, certainly not with each other!
Its so messed up, trying to control each other, telling the other person who they can and can't speak to etc the whole thing is pathetic.
Dump her, grow up a bit and then find someone else.

[IndiReloaded]

Rule of Life:

If you are going to manipulate someone, like you did, you better be smart enough not to be found out.