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Thread: A little unusual and not sure if this is a good idea...

  1. #1
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    A little unusual and not sure if this is a good idea...

    My girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me 6 weeks ago. We didn't talk much for a couple weeks, but then starting talking a lot more and meeting up once a week, spending the night, hooking up and basically acting like bf/gf when we are with each other. I really enjoy our weekly meetings and have a great time. I know normally this would be a terrible idea, but do these considerations make any difference:
    -She goes to college half an hour away. We have completely separate worlds when we're not together.
    -She's moving to the south in May and going to medical school. This next semester realistically is the last time I'll be able to spend time with her.
    -I don't usually get sad when i'm not with her, and we agreed we can both hook up with other people. After all, we're not bf/gf. Of course I don't love the thought of her sleeping with others, but as long as I don't know about it (and I won't), I can live with that without it stressing me out wondering. I may very well do the exact same thing.

    So basically I can't help but feel that I really care for this girl, she is like my best friend and I have a blast with her, and I only have a few more months that she is around. Is it ok to break the normal rules about not seeing each other if you know this is really your last chance to spend time with a close friend? And I know it will limit me from meeting new girls, but that's fine, I don't want anything serious now since I may very well be moving for grad school this summer. Thanks guys.

  2. #2
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    I think it's funny that the fact that she goes to school a half hour away means you have "whole different lives". I have a good friend who was dating a guy overseas freshman year - that's whole different lives. And a friend who was dating a guy an hour and a half away and he would drive up on weekends - certainly not really whole separate lives.

    You know it's a bad idea, but it seems that you're being rather realistic about what to expect, so that's at least a good thing. But I really don't think it's fair to either of you to "act like bf/gf when you're together, but be able to hook up with other people". You're trying to take what you consider to be the positive parts of the relationship, and throw away the negative sides of the relationship, but relationships don't work that way: they have good AND bad sides and you have to take it all if you want it to work.

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    Quote Originally Posted by seingold View Post
    Is it ok to break the normal rules about not seeing each other if you know this is really your last chance to spend time with a close friend? And I know it will limit me from meeting new girls, but that's fine, I don't want anything serious now since I may very well be moving for grad school this summer. Thanks guys.
    You're gearin' yourself up for hurt.

    But if you're okay with that, and she's okay with that, there's no reason why we here at LF shouldn't be okay with it.

  4. #4
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    Lovesjoyaim, by "different worlds" I just mean we don't share the same friends, don't see each other by chance, etc. I agree I'm asking for hurt, but I think it's worth it right now. Vashti I'm not worried about STDs, we're both very safe and it's not something that's an important issue here (argue if you want, but I stand my ground), and I dont expect her to start going crazy with guys, I'm pretty positive she hasnt hooked up with anyone yet.

  5. #5
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    That call love why must clash? i think u must couple like before owh.. so sweet
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