i told you guys that it worked....it turns out that it didn't. i'm DEVASTATED!!!

[elleda]

there are times when i would text message my boyfriend around lunch time and not hear anything back from him until 11pm. this has happened more than once, including one time when i was sick and needed someone to pick me up. he always has a million excuses but he keeps letting it happen.

i'll invite him to do something (either call and leave a message or text) and he won't get back to me until 10pm and by then it's too late.

also, we had a breakup right before he left for a trip, then we made up and he left. i was feeling vulnerable. i texted him, he texted me something nice back but said that he left his charger so he'd have to turn his phone off. he didn't call, text or even email me the whole trip.

again, a million excuses why when he got back.

i've had it. i broke up with him over it. the girl sitting by the phone waiting shouldn't be someone with a man who claims to love her.

we have also just recently conquered the hurdle of his unintended emotional affair with his ex. don't you think he'd be extra sensitive right now?

if we break up and i'm crying and hang up, i have to call him because 3 days later i'll not have heard a peep from him...!

is this normal???? he preaches and begs how much he loves me but i tell him that what he really wants is to be single and he denies it vehemently.

his words don't match his actions and his words are so strong! he says he doesn't know these things or how to be a good boyfriend.

i'm fed up with feeling rejected by calling and not getting a ring back until i'm already asleep.

but i miss him so badly i am heartbroken and crying and i'm not that type of girl!!!!!!!!

what to do

[elleda]

by the way, it's not because he's busy. his ass was unemployed for 3 months and this was still happening!!!

i am some kind of moron?? please tell me lol

[Nicholas_V]

he doesn't care about you - at least not the way you'd like him to. Realise this and find someone who does when you feel ready for it. In the mean time, join the club! :p

[Unimare]

Yes.
No, but really, you shouldn't stay with someone who doesn't bother to call back and see if you're okay. Whatever the situation. I've made this mistake myself. Been so infatuated with someone that I would always contact him and be dazzled by his sweet words. He was always very convincing verbally - because he needed or wanted something from me, or because he had nothing better to do at that time, or because he was used to having me around.. but the actions never matched up. He never initiated contact and it would be days or weeks before we got together again, of course, because I had called. Now I have someone who's not so emotionally expressive with his words, but his actions say that he deeply cares for me.
Okay, so your guy says he doesn't know how to be a good boyfriend. But if he cares about you, it'll show. It's just a natural tendency to look after the people we care about. Have you seen anything like that from him? Moments of tenderness or concern or other? What are the good aspects of this relationship that are still making you hold on? Because if there are none... well, you know how that sentence ends.

[DarkHelmet82]

dont get upset about it.. he obvioulsy is selfish and doesnt care about your feelings...

Unimare.. why are you still with him? i think its natural to want space, but not weeks at a time!

[Unimare]

^I'm not. The guy I was referring to was a fling at best, a jerk also. My current boyfriend is very sweet, just not expressive about his feelings.. which is another type of problem of course. : P

[im_a_fool]

My current boyfriend used to do this...he works constantly though and travels into areas where there is no cell service so I tried to understand...you probably shouldn't listen to me because my relationship is a mess because of games but I did actually start not responding to his texts for a couple of hours...after 2 days of this he suddenly responded much more frequently

[BackUpOrGetStng]

"i am some kind of moron?? please tell me lol"

Ironic, as this is exactly what your post made me think. Yes, you're a moron. He clearly doesn't care about you, he just likes your warm, wet holes. I can see why, doesn't seem like you got much going on upstairs. You're his steady pussy until he finds someone better. Start moving on, and don't give him another chance to hurt you, when he begs your to stay or whatever.

[HeartIsAching]

As unpleasant as the language was, GackupOrBetStng is right.

[elleda]

THANKS guys! i'm a tough cookie and a FREAKING GOOD CATCH. i have never been the dumb victim blind to what is really going on but, well, here i AM!!!
he's a loser too. go figure.

thanks again, that's what i needed to hear.

[IndiReloaded]

THANKS guys! i'm a tough cookie and a FREAKING GOOD CATCH. .

That's the spirit. A guy, no matter how busy they are, will make time for you if they care. He doesn't. This isn't a judgement about you, only about how you two fit. You don't, so move on.

[elleda]

just sent him this:

i would appreciate your not contacting me. although i highly doubt that would be a problem, considering that you made me cry and never bothered calling me back.

i can't believe i've been a fool for so long (which really wasn't that long, but too long still).

i am so embarrassed for myself because i've never been that girl.

um, especially to someone like you.

i realize that you have some soul searching to do and that you didn't do anything on purpose and that you set the tone for this relationship within the first 2 weeks, proving how his would end over and over again, and i chose not to pay attention. so really, it is my fault too.

like i have said before, you really need to learn. and to take an honest look around you. and i pray that you wake up out of the reality that you hold right now, because it will leave you lonely.

i was much too good for ANY of this and how i got so blinded, i really do not know.

i need a week to figure out arrangements for my cat. i can give you money or supplies for the time being if needed/wanted. you have my email.

[Nicholas_V]

not quite sure why you offer to give him "money or supplies" - but if that's how you feel, your call. Based on all I've read about him from your posts, I don't think he deserves such kindness

[elleda]

OH YEAH

he recently admitted to me that he cheated on his ex with a hooker!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHH GOOD LORD i have a university degree at what point did i become braindead????

[elleda]

not quite sure why you offer to give him "money or supplies" - but if that's how you feel, your call. Based on all I've read about him from your posts, I don't think he deserves such kindness

i don't want him to put my cat on the street!!!!!!!!! :'(((((((