Am I being jealous?

[Pmichael722]

My girlfriend had her phone out the other day and was on instagram. I saw her "top siggestions" and the first two were guys she used to date. The one is a bodybuilder and always posting revealing/muscle selfies. The other is another ex that I noticed she has an alert for every time he posts on instagram.

Should I bring up this bothering me? I am not sure how to without sounding like I peeked at her phone? Am I being unreasonable/ over thinking?

We have been together 9 months and she hasn't done anything to make me feel I can't trust her.

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Additional note. And maybe I'm being crazy... I wasn't even on her suggestions or anywhere. She is first on mine.

[hazey daisy]

This is something that should have been discussed before you two became exclusive. It's called relationship expectations and setting boundaries. 9 months in is going to be tough to bring up.

IMO if this is what she feels she can keep doing, then she isn't in any mature form or state of mind to be in a committed relaitonship. You are not crazy, you have different expectations and have a different view on how one should conduct themselves in a relationship. This means you two are not compatible. Your values are not a match.

The only thing you can do is just be honest with her...tell her you can't date someone who keeps tabs on their exes. Just say it like that. If she starts to get defensive, you just walk away. Then see how she takes care of things...if she admits to it, accepts that it's not right and will stop doin it, then she is on trial. If she denys it and gets all up in your ass about it, then you need to ditch her.

[Snow White]

If it is bothering you, then ,yes, you should bring it up. Perhaps she thinks nothing of it because she no longer has any feelings for them, but they split on a friendly basis. It sounds like you may be feeling a bit insecure because you mention the muscle photos. You also said that she has given you no reason to not trust her. Do not go in as if you are accusing her of anything. Just be honest. Tell her how it makes you feel. Personally, I feel if she really cared for you, your feelings would be more important than keeping tabs on exs. Good luck.

[psot2]

You are absolutely right to feel the way that you do.

Talk to her. Tell her that you feel uncomfortable with the fact that she still talks to her exes. Tell her that they should be in the past, and you should be her future.

The other posters were right that you should have set those boundaries right from the beginning, but I'd argue that it's not too late.

Don't tell her that you'd break up with her if she doesn't do it, but be prepared to.