About ready to throw in the towel for good!

[CleanCut]

So, as many of you know, this year has undoubtedly been the worse one of my life due to my medical situation along with my permanent loss of hair due to radiation treatments. I just recently have been feeling better about my new forced look and have mostly accepted it and just as I'm starting to regain my dating confidence, I have been through the worst "dating dry spell" in the last couple months that I've ever had. The summer months are usually my most active dating time of the year and in previous years when I had my hair, I was able to easily get 2-3 dates or more per week if I wanted to. Now with the "bald look" that has been forced upon me has apparently completely destroyed my dating appeal to women. I have literally messaged dozens of women every single night on my online dating sites for the last two months straight and only was able to meetup with two girls in total, neither of which would accept a second date when I asked. I have been told by several folks that I actually look good bald, but apparently that is simply not true and most women must just want nothing to do with a guy without hair.

All I seem to accomplish on any dating sites now is wasting all my spare time and draining out all of what little energy I left to muster. I'm usually a very positive guy, but I'm thinking I should probably just give it all up and accept my apparent dealt fate of dying alone and miserable. However, I don't know how else to combat the complete and udder lifeless loneliness of my day to day empty existence that is becoming quite unbearable. Or maybe I should just jump right to end and find a nice tall cliff to drive off of instead so I don't have to drag it out as long by dying slowly when my brain tumor comes back to get me in a decade or so;... Might actually be a more logical decision if you think about it...

What would you do in my crappy situation?

[pcmaster]

I think you put too much pressure on looks. I dont believe that is the case here. Perhaps you have changed as a person. Also problem is that you go for a very good looking girls and they are picky of course. Except if gir is totaly nuts then she wont be picky.
Anyway I go for whatever girls I can get. Looks dont matter to me that much and in the end I find these girls to be nice simple girls who are humple and welcoming. Thats all I need.
Except I pass on girls who dont look like my type at all and with who I totaly dont connect with by writing.

Anyway Clean if you care about looks so much then you could go to a stylist and start to look your sharpest on a dates. Also if you go for noticeably younger girks than you then its understandable why you dont connect, cause younger girls are extra hard to impress. And two dates in two months is pretty good. There are months when I dont find even single girl to date and my standarts are low. Think you was just lucky before.
At one point I felt like giving up too but my sister told me - stay single for a while and when you will start want to date again then do it.

In your situation I would take time off from dating to work on myself, work on self improving. And then come back stronger than ever. Its important that even now, even without dates you are happy and feel good on your own. So yeah when this happens you will be ready to date again. Girls should be just an extra not a bread and butter. Easy to say but I believe with some work on yourself and figuring stuff out, you can reach this advanced level.

[CleanCut]

No offence PC, but I don't think you truly understand my situation and, like I said, I did recently get to the point where I was comfortable in how I look, but apparently no decent women want it and obviously I'm not going to date any women that I'm not attracted to, that would be pointless as well as fruitless. I spent many years before not dating and I simply don't have that kind of time left to waste anymore; If I stop now, then my chances of ever being happy in life will drop completely to 0% and stay there.

A stylist?... is that a joke? What would they do with a bald guy, spray paint his head?

Obviously, the only thing that has changed from when I was successful in being able to get dates online before is the hair is gone, so that is the only logical thing that must be wrong then. It must just be a simple fact that most women do not want to date a bald guy regardless of how they became bald and they just don't bother looking into me past that.

[pcmaster]

Perhaps girls like hairy guys with hair everywhere except in intimate places. With stylist I mean person who helps to dress. If you dont stop then you dont have time to look at yourself and see whats wrong. If you date picky girls then it really could be hair. But dating Chowder type girls should help not to care about hair.

[WiltedRose]

I would have a break, find something else to fill that void for while there must be something? I'm just hitting the gym and going out with my friends to keep myself busy, I used to volunteer and I loved it but I needed more wages firmly mortgage!

Anyway like pc says it's not just you and your lack of hair lol (one of my best friends only dates bald guys!) she too old for you tho haha!) it's the same for most single guys at any age esp online dating you do judge by looks and the first date when you're both nervous (in most cases!) not really knowing who they are!!

[CleanCut]

I would have a break, find something else to fill that void for while there must be something? I'm just hitting the gym and going out with my friends to keep myself busy, I used to volunteer and I loved it but I needed more wages firmly mortgage!

Anyway like pc says it's not just you and your lack of hair lol (one of my best friends only dates bald guys!) she too old for you tho haha!) it's the same for most single guys at any age esp online dating you do judge by looks and the first date when you're both nervous (in most cases!) not really knowing who they are!!

Done all that stuff before and nothing will be able "fill this void" other than finding a decent GF to be with.

[Hooo!]

You reject every feedback that is going your way because either "it's stupid" or "not going to work anyways"

Fact is: you are the one with the problem. Not everyone like you has this problem. Not everyone with your looks has this problem, that means neither your looks nor your situation are the reasons.

Fact is also you re the one with the problem. That means that you have tried all things that seem working to you but they don't. I think now is the time you listen to other people if they give you advice

I am sure that you are a great guy and can have lasting success with women.
However that will need a change of attitude and a change of behaviour (in my opinion )

[CleanCut]

You reject every feedback that is going your way because either "it's stupid" or "not going to work anyways"

Fact is: you are the one with the problem. Not everyone like you has this problem. Not everyone with your looks has this problem, that means neither your looks nor your situation are the reasons.

Fact is also you re the one with the problem. That means that you have tried all things that seem working to you but they don't. I think now is the time you listen to other people if they give you advice

I am sure that you are a great guy and can have lasting success with women.
However that will need a change of attitude and a change of behaviour (in my opinion )

The change of success of online dating with no other changes other than updating my photos proves you wrong sir...

[pcmaster]

Actually I had crappy pic before and great sucsess with girls, really a lot of luck. Then later updated pics put in a really good ones compared to old ones and all sucess was gone, no more luck. Now I realized it was all about luck and what I was writting to girls. Over the past half a year I have became much more experienced and maybe not so nice or interested in gerls, more straight forward and going for what I want without really enjoying process and getting to know the girls.

So yeah man pictures dont mean a shit when you are out of luck. Or perhaps spring and autumn is the best time to pick up girls.

[CleanCut]

Don't know, summer was always my super busy months before. Yeah, not sure what the real reason is...

[pcmaster]

Have you tried Tinder? I have always girls to message there cause I swipe all of them right. Sometimes got matches with really cute girls. Sure some sex addicts there and low quality girls but thats internet so its understandable.

[Hooo!]

It proves me wrong. That is why you post here about how miserable your love life is?

Well if everything is going well then I'm glad to be wrong. It's nice.
Hope Your problems are all gone now?

[CleanCut]

It proves me wrong. That is why you post here about how miserable your love life is?

Well if everything is going well then I'm glad to be wrong. It's nice.
Hope Your problems are all gone now?

What I mean't is that I had no issues getting girls to date online when I had my hair and the only thing that has changed in my profile since I was successful in getting dates online is my updated pics without hair. So, this issue has nothing to do with how I act or interact with them, therefore it must be a looks issue...

[pcmaster]

Well man you can use your old pictures with hair to lure them in. See if luck returns. But I think nothing will change. Its like girls use so much makeup on their pictures and all the filters so when you meet girl in life shes a completely different person.

[CleanCut]

Well man you can use your old pictures with hair to lure them in. See if luck returns. But I think nothing will change. Its like girls use so much makeup on their pictures and all the filters so when you meet girl in life shes a completely different person.

That's certainly true and I actually bet that would start the flow of dates again that I'm used to having during the summer, but I'm just too much of a direct and up front person to do that as I hate it when chicks do that to me and wouldn't want to do that to anyone. I asked a girl I recently met at work today to see if she is interested in meeting up for lunch today and she accepted, so we'll see how that goes I guess.