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Thread: HELP- Was with right or wrong???!?

  1. #1
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    HELP- Was with right or wrong???!?

    Basically we were friends- he was in his 30's while I'm= 20's (girl). I moved away. Rang him twice which he was very happy about then he text me so I replied and I never got a response. Then a few days ago I text him asking him how he was & telling him he looked great, had to phone him to ask a question- asked him if that'd be alright. Once again got no reply. He had seen it though. This had been well over a day later. So I text him telling him I got the message loud and clear and that he could have just said no. I also pointed out how he never responds to my messages & just said 'goodbye'. He literally rang me instantly but I didn't answer as I was so hurt. Blocked his number from my phone. (NOT being immature just sick and hurt from all the mixed signals). Then last night our mutual friend who I haven't spoken to in about 5 months text me out of the blue. I also saw the guy in his thirties driving in to where I work now today. Confused... Opinions please?

  2. #2
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    Think you was wrong cause acting on emotion and didnt gave him chance to explain himself on a phone. Some people are not texters so you might have misunderstood him ignoring your texts.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  3. #3
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    If u block him doesn't that imply you don't care and don't want to know his reasoning and emotions anyways?

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    Blocking him was a mistake if you actually liked him. Guys in 30s are less likely to play games or want mind games played on them.
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  5. #5
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    Well, the guy shouldn't have been ignoring your texts. That was a mistake on his part. That's just rude, regardless of his reasons.

    I'm thinking he was going through a funk and just trying to figure out what he wants. However, your reaction was out of place to an extent. I understand that you were hurt as you felt he didn't value you, but you didn't give him a chance to communicate. You basically just told him, goodbye and blocked him.

    I belive in healthy communication, and while he did make a bad move. I would have given the guy a chance to speak. I'm not saying you needed to stay with the guy, but it just would have been the better move.

    I don't burn bridges unless the situation is irreparable, and even then, in those rare cases, i will at least be expressing myself and letting them know that they wronged me.

    The mutual friend text, well, the guy probably vented to them, so they reached out to you, possibly on their behalf. I'm not entirely sure, but like you said, 5 months, texts you out of the blue, that's not just a random circumstance.
    Last edited by GLYC; 21-08-17 at 06:41 AM.

  6. #6
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    I don't really think "right" or "wrong" are the right words to use here. So, let me explain my opinion of the story you shared with us. Yes, you maybe over-reacted a little.... but just as much YES, you had every right to feel the way you did. I don't think you should ever expect anybody to be a chronic texter.... but to just blatantly and completely ignore your texts is very rude. I think if you had come to use before your reaction I'd have told you just to stop texting him and stop reaching out to him completely. Just let him decide if he wants to make the effort and IF he does, you can maybe consider giving him a chance after all.

    ....BUT, with that said, I definitely cannot blame you for how you reacted. Believe me, I think we'd all WANT to do exactly what you did. It's just, there could be a million reasons why he didn't text. Even as simple as, as the others have suggested, maybe he's not a big texter at all. So, it probably would have been best not to say what you said or to block him, but I don't blame you one bit. I also honestly think considering him part of your past rather than part of your present or future would be a good idea anyway. You shouldn't have to basically hound somebody to get them to give you even so much as the time of day. If somebody doesn't value you and the time you give to them then they don't deserve you in the first place.

    So, it would have been best to just silently move on, forget him, and let HIM come to YOU if he decided to do so. But, what's done is done and I cannot blame you for it. So, for now, best to just move on and forget him. MAYBE he'll still find a way to reach back out and if he does you can consider then whether or not you even want to bother. If not, then you are better off anyway without somebody who can barely be bothered to give you their time.

    Good luck!

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