Just a quick question

[InderJoky]

There's also lots of useless and counter productive dating advice out there, if you're struggling,you will search for advice, and use it in times of desperation and dig yourself further away from your goals.

Remember, its always better to learn how to respond versus how to react. If you're unsure of what to do, take time, sleep on it and come back to it when you're emotionally leveled(respond).

It's a much better way then immediately saying something stupid and sticking your foot in your mouth (react).

This is probably the best tip I've read so far.
I'm just sorry that I didn't know it at the beginning of our friendship,
it could prevent me from doing a lot of stupid things and maybe this way everything would look different by now.
I just had a flashback last night, right before I woke up in which we meet and hugged.
I'm not sure if there is a meaning behind it or if it was just a random dream but anyway, thanks dude!
(btw, it may sound like I'm 'hurt' or something but no, I feel great haha)

[Hooo!]

I just told you not to act like a gay carpet.
And you wouldn’t listen. I’m not saying you should suppress your feelings or anything.
On the contrary you should follow them. But just not every stupid urge.

You want to win a woman? You don’t donnt do that by buying stuff for her

[InderJoky]

I just told you not to act like a gay carpet.
And you wouldn’t listen. I’m not saying you should suppress your feelings or anything.
On the contrary you should follow them. But just not every stupid urge.

You want to win a woman? You don’t donnt do that by buying stuff for her

I'm that kind of idiot who only learns from his own mistakes I admit it.
I already screwed up everything possible with that girl even though I really tried my best
but I'll use it as a lesson for the next time

[GLYC]

I'm that kind of idiot who only learns from his own mistakes I admit it.
I already screwed up everything possible with that girl even though I really tried my best
but I'll use it as a lesson for the next time

That's most people, I've definitely been there. Things like this happen for a reason, I really believe in that.
And you won't make the same mistakes with the next girl as a result.

When you make mistakes with a woman you really like, the emotional results of those mistakes literally become branded on you for weeks or months.
If that's not a reality check, I dont know what is.

Eventually you'll become so emotionally strong that you will be able to almost always remain objective in hard times.

The good thing is you're here, you're looking for advice, you want to get better, that's a great characteristic, so many other people solely blame others.
However, the alpha mentality isn't thinking "I'm the best there ever was", it's constantly looking for ways of self improvement, and being able to accept a loss not as a permanent failure, but instead as fuel for your success.

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This is probably the best tip I've read so far.
I'm just sorry that I didn't know it at the beginning of our friendship,
it could prevent me from doing a lot of stupid things and maybe this way everything would look different by now.
I just had a flashback last night, right before I woke up in which we meet and hugged.
I'm not sure if there is a meaning behind it or if it was just a random dream but anyway, thanks dude!
(btw, it may sound like I'm 'hurt' or something but no, I feel great haha)

You're welcome. Just remember that thing about internet advice as well, when you're desperate you'll look for ANY reason to do something even if it's counterproductive.

You'll find advice for BS apology letters and begging disrespectful lovers to take you back (not directing this at you, just using it as an example), and while that person may boast how much it works, the really is, every situation is different. This could be a woman writing this advice, however, women and men do operate differently with relationships (masculine vs feminine energy). This could be somebody with lots of time and experience with that person, and in some cases, even if the guy does everything wrong, the woman still comes back due to that long bond that they've previously shared. This could be someone writing short term success, Yes, begging her to try it again might have worked at the time of the post, but long term? She probably lost respect for the guy, and if a woman doesnt resoect you, she can never love you.

Sometimes doing nothing is actually the best action! In a lot of cases I actually think it is when you're dealing with people who no longer care, give them the gift of missing you!

Long post, but off topic, just some prime examples. Cheers!

[InderJoky]

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You're welcome. Just remember that thing about internet advice as well, when you're desperate you'll look for ANY reason to do something even if it's counterproductive.

You'll find advice for BS apology letters and begging disrespectful lovers to take you back (not directing this at you, just using it as an example), and while that person may boast how much it works, the really is, every situation is different. This could be a woman writing this advice, however, women and men do operate differently with relationships (masculine vs feminine energy). This could be somebody with lots of time and experience with that person, and in some cases, even if the guy does everything wrong, the woman still comes back due to that long bond that they've previously shared. This could be someone writing short term success, Yes, begging her to try it again might have worked at the time of the post, but long term? She probably lost respect for the guy, and if a woman doesnt resoect you, she can never love you.

Sometimes doing nothing is actually the best action! In a lot of cases I actually think it is when you're dealing with people who no longer care, give them the gift of missing you!

Long post, but off topic, just some prime examples. Cheers!

I will never fall back into that trap again, trust me.
All these stupid 'dating advices' did nothing good for me.
They only pushed me to make dumb decisions which made the whole situation even worse
and they also made me look at her in another light and I hate myself for it.
(I'm not talking about this forum but about youtube and etc)

[TheEvilJester]

Dating advice like that CAN be good... it's just you can't necessarily always take it at face value. Some of it is BS, some of it CAN be good... but it's more about taking the advice and putting it into the context of what works for you.

I don't know what sort of advice you found on YouTube and stuff like that, so I can't necessarily comment on whether it was BS or not. But, no piece of advice works for everybody exactly as stated. Life isn't a cookie cutter experience. It is a very unique and personal adventure. Hopefully yours can include some love and companionship very soon. Maybe you made some mistakes this time, but mistakes only REALLY become mistakes when you fail to learn from them. Otherwise, you can think of them as "learning experiences." Sounds like you are learning from yours, so that is a good start.

Good luck.

[InderJoky]

Aight, so as I promised to update you here -
We just met today and it was amazing!@
We had such a great time together, we were smiling and talking and hugging a lot
and I gave her the present that I bought which she loved
I can't describe to you in words how much happy and grateful I am right now.
It literally boosted up my mood from like 40 to 100, I don't remember when was the last time that I felt so good.
I'm so thankful for having her in my life even if we are only friends.

P.S
I woke up so positive this morning, it's crazy how much the little things can change your life.
Thank you all for helping me out and supporting me

[TheEvilJester]

Sometimes it does take just one little spark, whatever that may be, to make you feel better. Since it seemed like she was the cause (even if not the ONLY cause, at least a large part of it) for your feeling down lately, then things being better with her is definitely just the kind of spark you need.

So glad to hear things went well. I hope they continue to go well. Whether they do or not, though, do your best to find that happiness within yourself. It is definitely okay/understandable to feel bad when things are perhaps not the best with somebody you care about, but it is best if you can find the inner-peace enough to know you'd move on and be happy even if things never recovered. For now, though, hopefully you needn't even concern yourself with that anyway. Good luck!

[InderJoky]

Sometimes it does take just one little spark, whatever that may be, to make you feel better. Since it seemed like she was the cause (even if not the ONLY cause, at least a large part of it) for your feeling down lately, then things being better with her is definitely just the kind of spark you need.

So glad to hear things went well. I hope they continue to go well. Whether they do or not, though, do your best to find that happiness within yourself. It is definitely okay/understandable to feel bad when things are perhaps not the best with somebody you care about, but it is best if you can find the inner-peace enough to know you'd move on and be happy even if things never recovered. For now, though, hopefully you needn't even concern yourself with that anyway. Good luck!

I appreciate that, thank you very much.
I feel so strong emotionally right now, even though it's almost been a week since we met, I feel soo good like I'm at the top of the world

I appreciate that, thank you very much.
I feel so strong emotionally right now, like I'm at the top of the world, even though it's been almost a week since we met