Need Unbiased Opinion!

[thefeature]

Truth is I have told her I wanted to be with her only two weeks ago the week after we spent a weekend together. She said she couldn't and we should just be friends.

Im not racking my brain whether I want to be with her or not, I DO want to be with her. BUT on the other hand after she told me that I couldnt just sit around waiting for her. Yeah I kissed that girl at the club but thats only because I thought she only wanted to be friends and I had to accept that. It's only now after that extreme reaction that I realise she may actually have feelings for me now.

I know i am better now because I have solved all the problems I had whilst I was with her and even she has seen it/and said it since we have spent some time together.

Anyway I have decided that either today (fri in UK) or sometime this weekend I am going to try and talk to her in person and just put it out there one last time. Ill just say im sorry for hurting her and the misunderstanding last weekend but I want to be with her and work things out IF she can forgive me. If not we will have to cut contact and she cant keep reacting the way she did last week for me trying to move on with my life.

If anyone thinks this is the right or wrong thing to do then please let me know. Else im just gonna go for it!

[Junsui]

Go for it.

[Tearslost]

good luck.

[thefeature]

Hi everyone,

Thanks for the help I got from you all, just thought I would let you know an update on my situation... Well I did ring her friday and found out that I probably did deserve that drink over my head LOL

Anyway I sent her some flowers on the saturday (just as a sorry anyway) and she was really pleased but I thought we were never going to ever talk again. Went out saturday night and lo and behold ended up talking to a girl which she saw but I did NOT do anything and kept out her way all night as well as buying her a drink to replace the one she lost by throwing it over me. Got home and she had text me saying obviously I didnt care cos i was talking to another girl so i rang her (got voicemail) and asked what she wanted from me.

She apologised on the sunday morning and we spent the day together. I told her I wanted to be with her and would do anything to make it work and asked if we could sort our problems out.

Well i spent the night with her and all day monday and monday night and last night. Anyway we are seeing each other now just to see how we get on as time progresses (because she is still weary of me) but she has told me she loves me still and I have told her too. Now im not gettin my hopes up too early but just wanted to let you all know that there is hope. And truth is I can even write this now knowing it may still not work out but happy in the knowledge that I am in control of my own emotions due to what I have been through the last 6 months.

However I would recommend the only way to get anyone back is:

1) You have to be apart for at least 6 months - hard for me to say that because when u just break up that is unthinkable. But everyone needs time to let things heal and to change themselves properly. Everyone I know who got back with their partner did so after this magic date and my split has been just over 6 months now! LOL

2) You need no contact to sort yourself out and make sure you get yourself together so you dont come off as needy and desperate.

3) Date other people because jealousy will soon make people realise what they may be missing. Also gives you some confidence again and makes you realise you CAN lose that person and still be alright.

4) Be prepared to lose them. Only then will you give off the right attitude when you do speak to them. I now know I could lose her again but I am prepared for anything that comes and I think this comes across to her now and she is more comfortable and willing to spend time with me. She knows I want her but she also knows ill be alright without her.

Anyway thats just my personal 4 bits of advice, there are many more im sure but they are the ones that seemed to have the most effect.

Thanks again, hope this gives some of you inspiration