SHe forgot about our date?

[Sorae]

She initiated contact to plan a date for tonight at 7pm for desserts. Upon arrival, i arrived around 6:55 and proceeded to text her that i arrived. Thus, below is the actual text message content:

Me: You in town?
Her: Nah I m at home. Why
Me: Wasnt 7pm our meet up? haha
Her: lol oops totally forgot haha
Me: ok dw
Her: We can still do dessert. I ll get there in 15mins, if you want....
me: Its just idk how you forgot lol we made plans just before
Her: Very bad memory. So yes or no?

thats what was in the text. She then proceeded to ring me 3 times but i ignored it and went home and she fb messaged me saying "dude i have been trying to call you..". By the time she woulda came here it woulda been an hour after i came. i really dont want to waste my time

thing is in the previous dates, she would always come 30-2hours late but would text me continously, i even came late a few times myself and still came earlier than her. I pretty much went no contact till now which was for 4 days.

Who forgets a planned date when she planned it a few hours in advance? i just find it disrespectful and devaluing if someone forgets a planned date without apologising.

Did i do the right thing to ignore? still do kinda like her so i dont know if i should mend things?

[bunnyhabit]

she may have mental issues leading her to be forgetful. if you are really interested in her i suggest you discuss with her. if not satisfied with her explanation then dump her. give her benefit of the doubt is not doing on purpose. from all the follow up calls it appears she did innocently.

having a mentally ill lover has some challenges but also benefits to normal lovers

[omgtotallyxo]

haha, I like how bunnyhabit just jumps to the conclusion she has mental issues.

But I do agree with bunnyhabit to talk to her about this. There are many reasons for her behaviour: she had a hectic day she forgot, she has a habit of forgetting things, she doesn't give a shit about the date, she might be purposely trying to agitate you, she might try to get back at you for something, the list goes on. The only way to find out is to talk to her.

[bunnyhabit]

i didn't jump to any conclusion, merely said that it was a possibility for chronic forgiveness

[GLYC]

It sucks, the "forgot" part. That's not true. And even if it was true. You don't forget people that are important to you or that you're looking forward to seeing.

Now she sees that you have integrity and wants you more. It's a good trait

And where's her apology?? You're out there waiting for her.

However, I'd give her a one off if she apologized and just go out. Life is too short in all honesty. It sounds like this would have been your first date. Sometimes people have a fluke in their character and have an off day.

It's a weird situation since she contacted you for the date. A woman wouldn't do that with a guy for no reason. Although she did say that she would come out. Maybe she thought you weren't going to show or she was unsure, but even then, some women will get in contact with you to clear it up.

[Hooo!]

So instead of being a proper man and telling her of for bad behaviour and communicating your expecatations you simply ghost her and ignore her
Yes that is way better then coming late or forgetting dates

[GLYC]

Sorry misread some of this, this wasn't the first time.

Yeah, you needed to put her in her place. She's losing respect for you, so she just didn't show up.

Do it in a mature way though like how you described. "It doesn't sound like you value spending time with me, I show up on time, I show up to our dates because they're important to me, and I have those same expectations for others to follow"

Honestly, if a woman showed up TWO hours late to a date, I'd let her know what I thought of that. A half hour.. okay, but there should be an apology

[Sorae]

UPDATE*: i went no contact for a few days and this is what she sent me,
"I know it doesn't make up for it but I am sorry. After we made those plans, something urgent came up and it honestly slipped my mind. I got alot on my plate atm and i think we need to put everything on hold"

To my understanding, this is such a poor excuse, if it was urgent then she would of called me and apologised? she didnt even apologise when i texted her on the night. I dont believe shes sorry at all?

[AnErin]

I assume you and her are millennials. Your generation is not very smart to begin with.
Y'all are so hooked on social media that nothing else exists.

It is NOT your fault, it is hers because she might, well here are some possibilities -

If she is under 65, she likely has early onset Alzheimer's. If she is 65 or over, than it is regular Alzheimer's.
I know you want to help her but the only hope for her is to go see a mental health professional. If she has any form of dementia, her mind will slowly fade. She doesn't have to live out her days in a nursing home though, she can be put on home hospice where she can stare mindlessly at her cell phone and drool in peace while watching cat videos or updating facebook. The nurses will come by a couple times a day to give her meds and empty her bed pan and wipe her butt so she doesn't have to take any time away from FB or twitter.

The reason she was trying to call you is she got confused and thought you were the nurse who is suppose to come by and help her use the restroom.

[Hooo!]

Well you don’t believe hedge doesn’t want to see you anymore
So I guess the problem is solved isn’t it?!

[GLYC]

UPDATE*: i went no contact for a few days and this is what she sent me,
"I know it doesn't make up for it but I am sorry. After we made those plans, something urgent came up and it honestly slipped my mind. I got alot on my plate atm and i think we need to put everything on hold"

To my understanding, this is such a poor excuse, if it was urgent then she would of called me and apologised? she didnt even apologise when i texted her on the night. I dont believe shes sorry at all?

Do you want to date her ever again or Not?

If you do. Accept the apology, just be nice and caring.

This is what i would say something like,
"Okay, well, thanks for the apology. I don't really want to take a break from things, but if that's how you feel then just let me know when your schedule opens up. I'll let you make up for it by paying for a beer of mine and by just having a great night out together. Just, please be respectful of my time in the future, as I've always been respectful of yours."

You don't know what else is going on in her life, possibly another guy, or whatever.
Really it doesn't matter