Does this sound like I was Sexually Harassed?

[holahaysus]

I used to work in a business with this married father 17.5 years older than me. I was 18 and he was 36 when I joined the team.

He would play 'footsie' with me under the table and wink. He would bend down and rub my leg. He shaved his beard and said 'Do you fancy me now that I look 10 years younger?'. He rubbed my back along my bra strap and kept his hand there for a few seconds as he walked past me. He would hold my arm all the time, grab my hand and hold it, touch my shoulders, my thighs, my hair- he even used to brush off my BREASTS . I remember walking in to work and he appeared out of nowhere wolf whistling at me in the car park.

He would talk about sex constantly- especially teenage sex, threesomes, losing virginity, sex jokes etc. He once said he wanted 'Fresh Cherry' and 'Young Breasts'. He asked me if I was a virgin. One morning he said to me 'I have a tube filled with cream that I want you to suck out' & he smirked and said 'I can't show you here' winking. He called me a 'Hot 19 year old' once in front of all my colleagues.

I was flattered at the time that someone older was paying attention to me but he ruined me. I went back to college since but ever since leaving the Co. I have gained weight and cut my hair and feel unattractive. I feel like he emotionally abused me as he was extremely cruel and verbally abusive to me at times. Now I feel very angry and taken advantage of. He has wrecked my self-esteem. I have even had to go to therapy. Opinions? What should I do?

[lucylane]

sick bastards. and why did you been there for so long. you should have done something about that when he said fresh cherry thing.. SICK

[bunnyhabit]

definitely sexual harassment , get lawyer for compensation due to you for sharing your body to him reluctantly

[stuckgirl]

Yes, that is harassment. If you are questioning, check out videos from [URL=http://www.loveforum.net/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=ThatsHarassme nt]#ThatsHarassment[/URL]

They make it very clear when a line is crossed, and it definitely was for you.

[bulrush]

He would play 'footsie' with me under the table and wink. He would bend down and rub my leg. He shaved his beard and said 'Do you fancy me now that I look 10 years younger?'.

I'm a guy and this is clearly flirty behavior. Since he touched you, I would call it sexual harassment. I try not to overdo the sexual harassment claims, but I do have my limits and unwanted touching is my limit. That doesn't mean you have a court case. He got into your personal space and that's a main requirement for flirting IMO.

Just don't go near this guy again or work at that company. He's a jerk.

[bunnyhabit]

allowing him to avoid punishment by you hiding from him like the guilty one will only reinforce his desire to do again

follow [URL=http://www.loveforum.net/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=MeToo]#MeToo[/URL] and [URL=http://www.loveforum.net/usertag.php?do=list&action=hash&hash=NoMore]#NoMore[/URL] Movements to support women rights are as important as men rights

[richiro]

there is atual "sexual harassment" and there is "legal sexual harassment".

this is absolutely harassment, of a sexual nature for sure. has all the tell tale signs of it.
but if you're saying you want to sue the company for damages and money, that would require that this man had some type of control or influence on your career there at the company where this happened (aka he must be a supervisor of yours, manager, or somebody in a prominent position that you could argue that dismissing his advances you felt your job was in danger..) That part none of us know as you never told us what position he had vs what position yo had in the company.

criminal sexual harassment to put him in jail or file a restraining order against him - for sure.
to sue the company and get money from them for it? depends on your jobs there and the relatoinship between your jobs.

[PRW]

I agree with richiro

It was definitely bad, but he wasn't holding your job hostage. But then you didn't protest at the time, so we don't know what his response would have been had you protested.