Giving up on the new girl...

[shh!]

I am thinking that by the time she is 45, she won't care about being with men anymore.

Hmmm.... on the other hand....

Hey. HUssain - what time is it in your area? It is really early here, and I can't sleep. Stupid time change!!

[mhussain]

its like 1:38 am and i cant sleep as well

stupid daylight savings

[Mish]

Gee, nothing really expresses your love for your family member as deeply as making sure they don't get a partner in life... Let's treat all people we care about as our personal property!

Yea, he's 25!

Yay, you remembered!!!

[Rosebud]

[QUOTE=Mishanya,


Yay, you remembered!!! [/QUOTE]


Oh come on now, of course I did. I think there's only one other person on here that is the same age as us!

[shh!]

Gee, nothing really expresses your love for your family member as deeply as making sure they don't get a partner in life... Let's treat all people we care about as our personal property!



Yay, you remembered!!!

Not so! Life doesn't end before you are 30 - that is just when people make the vast majority of their really big mistakes, so avoiding the hassle until you are 30 just seems sensible! Besides, the friends I have that have waited until after the age of 30 to settle down are much more emotionally stable than any child-brides I know...

At what age does the average person get married in Australia, Mishayna? Because it is continuingly increasing in the states, especially in the big cities. 30 is hardly unusual, all kidding aside.

[Mish]

Not so! Life doesn't end before you are 30 - that is just when people make the vast majority of their really big mistakes, so avoiding the hassle until you are 30 just seems sensible! Besides, the friends I have that have waited until after the age of 30 to settle down are much more emotionally stable than any child-brides I know...

At what age does the average person get married in Australia, Mishayna? Because it is continuingly increasing in the states, especially in the big cities. 30 is hardly unusual, all kidding aside.

In Australia it's similar to the states, but what I have noticed is the deep learning curve. Relationships begin at around 16/17/18. People go through a long time of trial and error to discover themselves, what works for them, what kind of a partner they are looking for, Their criteria. By the time they reach 30, the person is so in touch with him/herself, their feelings, spirituality etc. that making a choice of partner is very easy comapred to the ones who have to start from the scratch and from inexperience. Call it the social school of dating, which begins at 16 and ends whenever they are ready to settle.

People who are inexperienced in relationships often get conned by sharks who play on emotional vulnerabillities and weak defences of these people. All in all, I think experience in dating/relationship building should begin during teenage years when the mind is still young and slowly develop until the time when the person is ready to settle down.

I have seen people who live at home with their parents until their 30s and who were forbidden to pursue relationships (E.g. Some friends from Italian and Asian backgrounds). They find it very difficult to adjust to the relationships in the future due to their inexperience, insecurities and phobias. Many go out there with an expectation that there is something fundumentally wrong with them having never dated. Some also decide that because they have never dated until 30s that having a partner in life is probably not for them. It's really sad actually...

I also know people who ran away from home (Mostly girls) because the parental pressure was just too extreme. This girl I knew for years, she lives in a another city now and dreads coming back home (She just turned 21). She tells me she couldn't be any happier.

[shh!]

Eh, I started dating in my mid-teens, and I can't say much good came of it. I am fairly certain had I waited till I was older, I would have suffered less emotional trauma and would have had a healthier sense of self before starting, and thus would have made better choices in dating partners. But the stakes are different (in general) for boys/girls, so I can see why you, being male, might have a different opinion on the ideal. In any case, I am a realist, and I know there is almost no way to stop them once the hormones kick in.

But I disagree that it is somehow "sad" if someone decides they would rather not marry. Marriage is tough, and (ideally) long-lived. It isn't for everyone, just as raising children isn't for everyone. I think it takes a great deal of responsibility and insight to recognize and admit that you just aren't cut out for it. Assuming you think it sad because of the loneliness aspect, I say that not everyone who is alone is lonely, and marriage is no guarantee that one will not suffer from loneliness.

[misombra]

so true, yet so difficult to get through to the typical single person. the grass really is greener on the other side. i probably know as many married people longing for the single life as i've seen single people wanting to be married. is there no middle ground?

[shh!]

Live together in sin!! Or, marriage contracts that last only 10 years. Then people would be less hesitant to get married because they could undo it (without stigma) or renew it as needed.

[misombra]

wow, like a lease on your relationship. that's quite interesting.

[Rosebud]

ya know if I could I would not let my daughter date until she was 30 either. Although my bf says he plans to hold that to truth. But I think the relationships you go through no matter what age give you experiences to learn from. If you start earlier like 18 or so, then by the time your in your late 20's/early 30's you will ahve enough experinece to know truly what you want out of a relationship to be able to settle down. Not to mention those are good ages to have kids since you still have the engergy for them.

[whaywardj]

If they're old enough to bleed, they're old enough to breed.

[shh!]

That is gross, considering some girls go through menarche at 9 years old...

[misombra]

somebody please take hayward out of alabama.

[whaywardj]

Gross? Malarky.