I act like FWB is an actual relationship...ugh HELP!?

[Bbcolz]

So I met this guy in the middle of the year. I'm a junior in high school and we had the same Spanish teacher but different periods. I had Mrs.Lyduc seventh period while (we'll call him J.) J. had her sixth period and when I would go to seventh he would still be there for a few minutes and talk to either his friends or Mrs.Lyduc. We started talking to each other and he seemed really funny and sweet. But then I wanted to talk to him after school and my friend had his Snapchat so I asked her to give it to me (I couldn't ask him to his face cause I didn't have the guts). She did and we talked on there. That's when I started falling in love with him. I wanted to call him also so we called a few times but each time it was kinda awkward because I really didn't know what to say. So we stopped talking on the phone just being on Snapchat. But one time while we were in the phone I asked him what he felt about friends with benefits and he said he wouldn't mind doing it and he asked me and I said I couldn't do that because Everytime I do it it always ends badly because I start falling for that person (see my friend with benefits isn't the traditional one; my friends with benefits is doing everything besides sex or head) and he said ok. But that's where it turns the way I didn't want it to and we became fwb.... The one that I do. It was pretty good you know and then last week we stopped doing it and I wondered why but I didn't ask him. Then on Sunday I ask him what he plans on doing for spring break and he says this "fix my chicken house and hopefully go in a date with my girlfriend"............when I tell you my heart sank to the bottom. Tears rolled down and would not stop. I kept thinking "every guy I like is always taken from me". Which I know I'm not dating them but every guy I like I become fwb because I'm afraid of putting my heart out there but at the same time I get hurt anyway not dating them so I don't know I'm wierd. So anyway I'm all sad and miserable and this last till still today and I can't stop thinking about him. I don't want to sound like a wierdo but I do and I have dreams about him I imagine him with his girlfriend being romantic, having children, his mom liking her a lot and they become a wonderful family with beautiful children and a happy life.... So can you give me some advice on what to do? Also I want to be friends with him still because at least I get to still talk to him. But I just don't know how to stop thinking about him and get over him. Help?!

[pcmaster]

Are you sure he didn't mean you when he said his girlfriend?

Anyway if you want to forget him then talk everything out with him. You should not just be honest but also get a closure. Then afterwards distance yourself and your attitude towards him - become colder. And of course find a new better boyfriend. Also you can google guides on how to get over ex. There is one thing I remember. - Write down all the negative things about him everyday on a paper. Then eventually after time list gets longer.

[Bbcolz]

pcmaster: 😓 you want me to tell him how I feel?.......you want me to actually tell him I've been going insane because I'm jealous and yadda yadda?! How?! Literally how?! 😥 I can't I don't wanna seem like a wierdo and then he stop talking to me altogether or he tells his friend some obsessed freak of a person has been creeping on him.......but maybe your right......even if you are right I don't have the guts nor the balls to do that. Maybe if I was able to drink and got drunk I could do it but I'm on 17 so. And he wouldn't be referring to me I can promise you that. Also I think I know who the girl is I'm not sure but I went on Instagram and on one of my friends page he posted a photo from his trip to some competition in his club which the guy is in and I saw him having his arm around a girl. I'm just so surprised that I'm being like this it's not like me and Ughhhhhhbh wanna scream at the top of my lungs or get a hammer and break something like a wall or glass. 😔😔😔😔😳

[pcmaster]

If you could have sex with him then you have rights tell how you feel too. Since you are not worthless piece of shit who don't even deserve to express feelings. You are human and are allowed and have rights to have feelings and express them.

So what if he don't talk to you anymore? You got nothing to lose since things is not the way you want in first place. You deserve better than FWB. Next time don't settle for less.

[Bbcolz]

pcmaster: we didn't have sex we just merely kissed and hugged.....pretty much it. I do that do the traditional FWB I do the clean one I guess you could say.