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Thread: New relationship, but sex stopped

  1. #1
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    New relationship, but sex stopped

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    New relationship, but sex stopped. How long to wait?
    Hey guys,

    New poster here. I've started a relationship a couple of months ago with a good friend of mine. We've been friends for years. Anyway at the start (first few weeks) the sex was fantastic. Then the sex stopped completely. I've tried but she gets nervous and sex actually hurts her. Now to me that's a red flag that there's no attraction. I actually said this to her and said that maybe it's not working. We were friends who tried and no hard feelings. I've said this once or twice now but she absolutely refuses to break up and says she loves me. I'm currently giving it a try. Now here's the thing. She's says she's going through a stressful time with work and that is the case. She's in danger of loosing her job and was treated very badly by her boss. The second thing is that I'm her longest relationship at four months. She has issues from her childhood that affect her trust so all of her sex was quite infrequent. Months apart and never in a relationship.

    Anyway I do care for the girl, hence the reason I'm giving her a chance, but I wanted advice on what I should do. I'm not pressuring for sex and don't even try anymore, but I'm sure neither of us want this to continue for months. Anyone else have a similar experience or can offer some advice?

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Sex is a good stress reliever. So maybe sex wasn't that good or there's something else going on.

    Think you should try to talk more about this and see if she gives any other reasons as well.

    Also, give this relationship a deadline - how long you are willing to continue if things don't improve.

    Sure not every touch and kiss have to end with sex. You can try Karezza sex what is sex without orgasm, that includes a lot of cuddling etc. Look it up, there's even book on that. Also, there is a book called cuddle sutra. You could research and try new cuddling positions. Also, you could ask her a lot of questions. Like, google 88 really questions to ask your GF. Also, there are questions to ask the girl you like. Try to remember them and ask them when you have time to talk.

    Meanwhile, during this dry spell, you could go on a date with her or go on a weekend trip somewhere or just one-day trips to nearby places.

    Almost forgot. Theres this site called nofap. You could join and set up a counter so see how many days you can go without PMO - porn, masturbation, orgasm.(orgasm includes sex too)
    Last edited by pcmaster; 30-04-18 at 03:10 AM.
    Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2018
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    If the sex hurts her, then she should go see a doctor to see if she has an infection. The only thing I can suggest is communicate the best you can with her issue about work and other stuff that may come up. If she starts being distant and uncooperative, take a break. Just stop seeing each other for a couple of weeks so she can focus on whatever is troubling her. TBH I think it's selfish on her part to expect you to stick around if she won't help herself resolve these issues.

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