Irrational Jealously tearing at me

[Upross]

I am getting married this Summer to a woman who was married previously. She has two kids who get on well with me and who have little contact with their dad. My fiance is away on business this week so I thought I would paint the spare room for her. While doing this I came upon a box of photographs most of which were of her and her ex including many of the wedding. Being a masochist I looked at them all and am now fiercely jealous. They are divorced this 8 years and I know she detests him now but she looked so beautiful and happy in those pictures. Also we are only having a small civil ceremony and reception which I am doing ALL THE organising of because that is what she wants but her first wedding seems a huge one with morning coats,bridesmaids etc. I feel now that maybe I am second best and just a father for her kids and a dependable breadwinner for her, although I probably am being unfair. Yet she kept all these picture yet she has none of me. She seemed to have a camera everywhere before but the only two pictures of us together were instigated by me. (e are together 2 yearrs and have had three holidays abroad)What I am jealous about is that I have never seen her look at me the way she looked at her ex in many of the pictures. She looked so in love.
I know I am being irrational but I feel demented and am afraid I am going to say something awful when she returns. I have NEVER felt jealous on anything or anone in my life before (Im 35!)

[TAVS]

Grow up. I see nothing wrong with anything you've described except your jealousy.

[Tone]

I have NEVER felt jealous on anything or anone in my life before (Im 35!)

This is the only thing I see wrong with this!

Makes me glad I got all that shit out the way when I was young.

[vashti]

You can only be in love for the first time once, so it is not surprising that she doesn't look at you the same way. She was young and foolish when those pictures were taken, and don't forget that they were probably posed, and not natural.

Anyway, you know very well that she doesn't love him any more, so why try to compare yourself? Forget the pictures - they are momentos for her children for later on (he is a part of their history and they will want the pictures).

[Upross]

You can only be in love for the first time once, so it is not surprising that she doesn't look at you the same way. She was young and foolish when those pictures were taken, and don't forget that they were probably posed, and not natural.

Anyway, you know very well that she doesn't love him any more, so why try to compare yourself? Forget the pictures - they are momentos for her children for later on (he is a part of their history and they will want the pictures).

You are right I guess. I am acting like a stupid 15 year old.

[Upross]

This is the only thing I see wrong with this!

Makes me glad I got all that shit out the way when I was young.

Thats because I never loved any of the other women I had relationships with before. Wish it wasnt so.

[Tone]

Well as the others have said, you need to get over it and let it go. I can see why it would bother you, I think it'd bother almost anyone, at least momentarily - but you gotta let it go.

The grass always LOOKS greener on the other side of the fence.

[alice]

Makes me glad I got all that shit out the way when I was young.

ha–ha!
you sound like you were 80.

[Tone]

I'm only 57 years away!

[alice]

so you've made up your mind not to fall in love again for the next 57 years?

[Tone]

Huh?? What's that have to do with anything?

I meant the jealous behaviors~

[alice]

Huh?? What's that have to do with anything?

I meant the jealous behaviors~

i just don't believe you when you say you've got it all out of your way. you're still very young, you'll never know what's gonna happen.

[Tone]

Well of course not... I agree with that 100%.

I meant I'm glad I'm not having MY FIRST incident when I'm 35 years old.

GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ

[alice]

Well of course not... I agree with that 100%.

I meant I'm glad I'm not having MY FIRST incident when I'm 35 years old.

GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ

then say it!
GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ
you really sounded like you were done with jealousy for good.

[Tone]

you really sounded like you were done with jealousy for good.

Oh I know that's not true