forbidden love

[Mish]

they forced me to quit my job because i work with mike..now both of us are quitting......

I don't understand, how can someone force you to quit your job? That doesn't make a lot of sense to me.

Hmm, somehow, I think you have already made a choice about who the winner will be in this saga...

[secrets]

honestly guys..this has torn my family.and yes..it is a race thing...they stated that i am white..and he looks dark..blah blah..which is ignorant and awful...and i am soo upset about it..and well..they are watching my every move..same with my sisters..keeping an eye on what im doing..i cant be sitting in my room ..i cant even answer the phone..my sisters must report it to my parents...my dad is shattered and broken..and it kills me..but he keeps telling me to leave and to go marry mike and to go blah blah blah...
its bad...i think this has been my cue to leave..i dont know how i will pull through with this...i think i wil just have to live it out and then live on residence next year or something...and how am i supposed to live on my own if i have no job..yeah..my parents are being ridiculous...i am sooo upset..

..and its driving mike crazy..last night was awful..i dont know what to do guys...my parents cant even look at me the same again..they just talk bad about me..nothing good..my dad cries and then goes on and talks bad about me..my mom said i am gonna be a prostitute on the street if i leave...its awful..i want to leave...

i just cant stay with mike...well..i can.but its just soo wrong..i dont wanna invade in his family..

what do i do...??

i think my cue has come to leave! i think i need to live with a friend or something....i dont know!

[Mish]

I think there is no point to ask since you have already made your choice.

[secrets]

what do you mean..?

i think about leaving my family and it kills

then i think about leaving mike..and it kills
...we are gonna stick it out though...

i honestly am gonna go with living on residence next year...mike and i will make it that far..i cant wait...

thanks for your input guys i will keep you posted on the situation if you care...lol..

[Prodigal]

I agree with Mishanya. You have made your choice, as you stated in this post. You said, "...we are gonna stick it out though...".

You have made your decision. You are going to stay with your boyfriend. You gotta just tolerate your family... what you are going to do about that... well, they're going to 'monitor your every move'... that's a hard thing to handle. I'll get back to you on that..

[secrets]

..i know...its really hard for me...i have been monitored a lot..i have been overprotected...but never to this extreme..i was barely ever allowed to go out anyway....so yeah..i was one to stay home friday and saturday nights and stuff..and still am..

yeah...i even resigned today from work..well i told my parents i quit..but i just took a leave of absense..cause i do love my job....honestly guys..this is soooo hard...

im monitored...i have no life..i cant see my boyfriend..

is life really worth living like this..? my family is not mending..my mother hates me..my sisters attack me..my dad tries to be nice...but hurts inside..

life..is over!!!!

[Mish]

yeah...i even resigned today from work..well i told my parents i quit..but i just took a leave of absense..cause i do love my job....honestly guys..this is soooo hard...

I still don't understand why you "had" to quit your work? Were you given an ultimatum that if you don't quit then you are out on the street? Also, what kind of work is it, would it give you enough resources to support yourself?

[secrets]

my mom wouldnt let me leave the house without a letter..these are my parents..they like forced me..they were yelling..screaming..telling me i dont need the job (for the sole purpose that i met mike there)..so yeah..

and well..i told my manager that i want a leave of absense...its just a boutique job that i love and have worked there for 3 years..thats why i like it..soo convinient and so close to home, and i love the gurls there..

so anyways..my parents pay for everything for me anyways..

..anyhow..yeah..i was given ultimatums...

my dad and i had a talk today..he says we can get past this..and i owe everyone an apology..and he said he hopes this never happens again..

i am still with mike though..i will not let him go...my dad told me..if he finds out that i am with him..or something like this happens down the road..i will be kicked out..so yeah..thats my option right now..
im focussing on school..my dad said my sisters will cool it with their attitude..he will make sure of it..

so this problem will be revisited again down the line if i end up with mike...

and..we will have to sacrifice not having a normal relationship...

...however..in the end..if we are meant to be..we will be together...my family may disapprove and hate me..but i will always love them...always...thats why they are still first in my book..

[Mish]

...however..in the end..if we are meant to be..we will be together...my family may disapprove and hate me..but i will always love them...always...thats why they are still first in my book..

I see

I am sorry to say this, but under the circumstances I have very little hope for your relationship with Mike. At this point in time you will always choose your family and your family's ruling over him until such point that your relationship becomes completrely exhausted and weathered out. I suppose maybe it's the right thing to do for you at this stage, I don't think you are ready to make a choice between dependancy and personal freedom at this point in time.

In any case, Good Luck

[Tone]

I think she's just using this forum/thread to vent. Because she's just rehashing the same stuff over and over and over and over and...

[vashti]

Yeah, and actually I question the truth of the events anyway. Something just isn't right, and she avoided answering my questions. We are definitely missing something.

[secrets]

..yeah..i do use this forum to vent...and well...what i have said has been the entire truth...i swear..thats why i like people's feedback..some give me hope...some shun it..and thats ok..cause it gives me a way to look at both sides...

..why would i make up a story if i wanna have good feedback about it..lol..come on now..guys..

[clynn]

I think that sssh....is referring to questions she asked that suggested the issues had some more valid (but nonetheless devastating and still unjust) reasons that were racially motivated...based on the area of the world you live in and the actual threat / danger a relationship like this could impose on you and / or your family.

It is unfair. It is awful. For your family to be this way. For the world to be this close minded. And that you fell in love with the wrong boy.

One hopes there can be a future for you in all of this. But it sounds very very difficult.

Good luck.

[Tone]

I hope everything works out, secrets.

[vashti]

[QUOTE=clynn]I think that sssh....is referring to questions she asked that suggested the issues had some more valid (but nonetheless devastating and still unjust) reasons that were racially motivated...based on the area of the world you live in and the actual threat / danger a relationship like this could impose on you and / or your family. [QUOTE]

Yup. That is what I am referring to. Of course, for her to admit that there are some extenuating circumstances might make her parents look less villainous, which in turn would make her look less sympathetic.



[QUOTE=clynn]It is unfair. It is awful. For your family to be this way. For the world to be this close minded.[QUOTE]

You know, she said her dad is crying over this. That doesn't sound to me like he is a hate-filled bastard. That is why I say there must be something we are not hearing.

I agree that it is too bad the world is this way (or at least, parts of the world), but it IS, and honestly - as a parent - I can say truthfully that if I lived in an area in which my child's safety might be seriously jeapordized (or that of any of their siblings) because of their choice in lovers, I would discourage it also. Sorry.

Of course, knowing my daughter, she wouldn't listen.

But that doesn't mean I wouldn't try.