girls i really need your help

[chris20]

hey guys Im currently having some problems with my girlfriend, we met in my work about 3 months ago and as soon as we got talking we hit it off in a big way so ever since weve been dating. ive had the time of my life since ive been with her and care about her so much. before she got with me she was with her ex for a period of 4 years, she was 17 and he was much older(she is now 21) she split up with him only about a month or 2 before starting to date me. she has just recently told me she wants to break up cause she needs some space as she feels she hasnt been single and doesnt want the pressure of another relationship, which to me i can understand. she still wants to see me and go out with me, kiss/cuddle but just not have the pressure of having a relationship. now i know u might be thinking well its not all bad but too me i am so distraught, im a really sensitive guy and feel like crying. we went the pub on friday in our dinner hour that was the last time i seen her, im trying my hardest to give her a bit of space but i miss this girl so much and ive never been so sad over anything. im losing sleep/weight over it. i really need some advice on this one guys, i know im new to the site but please any advice would be great

thanks so much

also she says im the perfect gentleman and could not have done anymore in the relationship which kinda makes this whole thing harder as i havent done anything wrong and have put my heart and soul into making this work. she has said that once she feels ready for a relationship again she will take me back but that doesnt help me in the meantime!! please help girls, how long does it usually take for a girl to be ready for another realtionship, i know its different for every1 but this really is tearing me apart. please help

[Ellynn]

Well even though she said you did nothing wrong, then why are you blaming yourself? Or acting like you must have done something wrong? Its all her. Her decision not to want a relationship etc. Maybe shes afraid you were just a rebound and she wants to figure out if she truly wants something with you or not.

All you can really do is let her have her space. And in the meantime keep your options open...to other people. IF she still doesn't want a relationship after awhile....then write her off. I mean its honestly not fair for you to sit around and wait for her forever...

[iulikewhoa]

it also sounds like she may be somewhat of a best friend... and losing your best friend cold turkey kind of sucks...

But the best you can do is realize that life goes on and what is spposed to happen will happen... So don't dwell on it and you giving her space may help her realize what she gave up... you can still be there for her, just don't be there ALL the time... show her you have a life and that your life is going on and she may want you back...

[Gigabitch]

I'm sorry to have to tell you this, but the phrase "I need space" is doom, doom, doom.

I feel for you, and I think things are going to be hard for you for a while. Don't expect her to suddenly realize she's making a big mistake, because she won't. The truth is, she's just not available.

[sasa91]

just my opinion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If i met you two i could probably change my opinion, but hey.

i need space = i've met someone new.

mmmmm. If you really consider yourself marrying her one day, wait for her space. I know it souuuuuuuunds like she's really needing space, but she only needed 2 Months to get over her ex of 4 years. I'm guessing she just found someone new. If she really did love you as much as you love her, would she really need space?

moreover, if you're losing sleep over this, go to a stripclub and find someone new. seirously.

hope it works out for you. (and sorry if that was harsh advice)

[Kellie_Sabrina]

It seems to me that she wants to have her cake & eat it too. This just sounds like one big mind game. If you are losing sleep & weight, this is a problem! I know what it is like to luv someone & then realize that you are losing them. Honestly though, you can't just sit around & wait for her to decide when ya'll should be together. That's just not fair to you, & it's not healthy! If she cared so much, she would realize the pain she is putting you through & let you go. Either that or she is immature! I know it's painful & hard, so the best thing for you to do is let it go & do something positive in the meantime. Work your frustrations out in the gym, through sports, music, shopping, or hanging out w/friends... just whatever makes you happy that doesn't involve her. You can turn something negative in your life into something positive! And hey, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger!