Let me hear your thoughts please.

[margeux]

I'm texting a guy for almost a week now. We don't text 24/7 if that's what you're thinking. We spend like 2-4 hours talking a day. He has work, so do I and we live in different timezones so you'd expect erratic replies, really.

Well, we go way back. We belonged to the same class in high school and were in a band together. He was on the strings and I was in the vocals. We used to always hang out for practice but never just us alone, always in a group.

Tbh, I never really like-liked him then because he was on the talkative side and would oftentimes play around with his guy friends in the band. He came off a little annoying and the highschool me did not have the patience. They always thought I'm the serious type.

We spent a couple of years in hishschool as classmates until I had to move on the 3rd year and that's it. We never communicated for the past 8 years until recently.

So fast forward to now, he's become mature. Now dropping hints about settling down and honestly, that's what I want too. I mean, i'm not getting any younger and I want to start my own family pretty soon.

Since I knew him in highschool, I cant help but remember him the way he was back then - funny, a little noisy, and definitely NOT serious. So even when he tries to sweet talk me, he's far from earning my trust. Although I give him the benefit of the doubt since it's been years and I personally not a fan of prejudice, I just really can't stop doubting.

He's abroad but will be coming home this summer and he said he'll prove his intentions then.

But..

I think we're going too fast? Idk.


Update:
It's been 2 days since he hasn't sent me a message. Do I check on him? I mean, I don't want to appear clingy or whatever, you get me?

[Hooo!]

What do you want?

[TheEvilJester]

Yeah, this time Hooo definitely echoes my sentiments. I'm not sure what you are asking us here. It's not clear what you want. Do you want to give him a chance as a possible romantic interest? Do you still think you just can't see him that way? We can maybe offer more helpful thoughts/advice if you make it a little clearer what the problem is here/what question or problem you are trying to solve.

[CantMoveOn]

Yes, check up with him and send a thinking of you, how are things going with you? Why hesitate if you like someone it is natural without thought to send a text or quick call to say hi, or try to make plans to get together at some point. Maybe he is leaving the ball in your court, and is why he is silent?

[margeux]

I want to give him a chance for a relationship but I'm having doubts because I remember him is that highschool boy.

[Hooo!]

So you cannot give him the chance then after all?

[TheEvilJester]

How long has it been since high school? Nobody is the best example of themselves in high school. So, he certainly doesn't deserve to be judged based on that. If that's your only reason for not giving him a chance when you otherwise feel like you want to, I think I'd personally say just give him a chance.

Don't get me wrong, though. Sometimes it can be really hard to look past a bad first impression somebody has made. If some gal I felt had wronged me suddenly showed up... I don't think I'd care if she's become a completely different person for the better. I would be happy for her, wish her no ill-will, but I couldn't see giving her a chance to come back into my life. I just wouldn't see any need. She's part of my past and belongs there.

So, I guess I could understand if you just can't get over that image you have in your mind of him. Did he ever do anything to hurt/wrong you? Or was he just kind of an idiot? LOL! Because, everybody is an idiot in high school. LOL! Especially guys.

Ultimately, you have to decide. But, if you want to give him a chance but the ONLY thing holding you back is you're not sure you can see past who he was in high school... I think I'd personally suggest just giving him a chance. How else are you going to look past who he was in high school if you don't even give him the chance to prove if he's changed for the better, or if he's still exactly the same?

Best of luck either way.