I'm ready to...

[HAL78]

Let go... Hey everyone, I'm new here and thought i'd stop in and seek some advice. I'm 28y/o and my g/f is 26. We have been together for over 8 1/2 years and have no kids. Any who, i am in love with her b/c of everything she has done for me in the past, especially when my parents passed away. I know she'll be there when i can count on her etc... However, these past 2 years have been really rough for both of us b/c we lacked communication. I'm the type to confront the situation and not back down until we resolve the issue. Unfortuantely, she is the type to be reserve and stay quiet and not get involve. She constantly asks me if i love her and that she wants for me to tell her everyday which i do. I'm the crazy one and i enjoy going out every weekend and don't like to stay indoors. She on the other hand wants to settle down and have a baby. My main issue is that i want for her to communicate more effectively and give me attention in the physical aspect. When it comes down to making love, i feel that i always initiate the first move and always have to ask her for it. I would like for her to show me just as i show her, but she doesn't. Her typical weekday is come home from work, cook, read her books, or watch tv. I am getting really bored of the repetitive pattern and need some excitement. I try to give her hints by telling her that i enjoy having sex, teasing her, telling her that we should try different things by buying each other something from a sex shop, sharing secrets, revealing our fantasies, etc.... but i feel that it's not getting to her. I had to go to extremes by telling her that i want her affection and attention. I just don't want to stray and seek it elsewhere and jeopardize what we have. Is she even physically attracted to me? I did ask her and she said YES. I am exhausted from giving her hints and ready to give it all up or just stop giving her attention and ignoring her to the point, where i will be less affectionate and go about my day. I really do want to work things out and put excitment in our lives or throw down the towel and seek it from someone else. I'd appreciate the inputs and advice. Any ideas...

[vashti]

I really do want to work things out and put excitment in our lives or throw down the towel and seek it from someone else. I'd appreciate the inputs and advice. Any ideas...

If you haven't told her this bluntly, then you should. However, if you think things will be exciting with ANY woman after 8 1/2 years, you are mistaken. Familiarity makes for routine, not excitement.

[DaddysAngel]

Im going throw the samething man i feel for you. the only differnce is mine was on fanfiction making new friends which was fine with me till one talked her into going out. you can try taking her out to someplace quit with no destraction and explane to her just how u feel and where you would like the relationship to go and listen to what she has to say. if she want to make some changes and you are too maybe meet in the middle.be glad there are no kids involved because that makes it awhoile lot more complicate then no matter what happen you will want to stay for the kids sake i know ive been married and miserable with kids before which leads me to my point if you are miserable and she wound bend with her was what is your happiness worth? it might be a hard pill to swallow but you might just have to find someone who will make you happy.and im not saying you have to throw your friendship with her but going though live miserable is not worth it ether i hope this helps

[Gigabitch]

What the hell?!

What, you never do that?

[Gigabitch]

My advice: road trip. It's private, yet not the usual circumstance, and can be very conducive to communication Drive somewhere and stay overnight. Sometimes it's easier to have these intense conversations in the car because you HAVE to look at the road, and can't drill holes into your SO with your eyes.

[vashti]

No one does.