Are you comfortable with your body?

[mr_fahrenheit]

One of my friends has some sort of body dysphoria, and my little sister sometimes seems to have some kind of body dysmorphic disorder.
In my sister's case, I'm not sure if it's just normal teenage girl stuff or a serious problem.

I was wondering how common it is for people (both male and female) to not like their bodies?

• Are most people happy and satisfied with themselves apart from a few niggling things perhaps?
  
• Or is it common to get distressed (to whatever degree) about your appearance/body?
  
• How do you actually feel about your body? Are you comfortable with it? Are you (at least fairly) confident being naked in both your own company and in the company of another person? And do you feel satisfied when you're dressed with your appearance?
  

I am genuinely very interested in the answers.
Thank you very much in advance for any

Mr F

[Junket]

Overall, I've begun to become dissatisfied with my overall appearance.

Actually, it's not so much my appearance as it is my capabilities. But my appearance reflects my physical prowess. But moving on...

When I was a child into my pre-teen years I gained a significant amount of weight. I maxed out at about 150 lbs. when I was in 5th and 6th grade.

I began to even out as I grew taller, but I never grew tall enough to get rid of it all. The summer after I turned 16, I decided I was sick of being over-weight, so I exercised and went a bit "anorexic". I finished dropping off the 15-20 lbs and leveled out, and got back into healthier eating habits.

AmeriCorps I got in the best shape of my life as we had a constantly active life style, and had a budget to burn on healthy meals.

Now that I've gotten out, bein' back in school and work, it's hard to keep a proper eating schedule. I pretty much eat whatever, whenever. Likewise, my time to exercise is also far and few between. My legs and arms have gotten noticeably (to me), smaller and weaker, and have a much less defined stomach.

Really, I'm more unsatisfied with my lifestyle which is causing my less-than-ideal physical appearance.

But that will all be changing soon after I get out of school.

[Gigabitch]

I'm reasonably comfortable, but not as much as I used to be. In my mid-twenties, I was so comfortable as to be almost unconscious about it. Plus, I was living in a very warm place, so nobody wore all that much. Now I'm almost 40, so nothing's quite what it used to be, but I have very little to complain about, overall. I still walk around close to naked every morning.

[vashti]

I think the vast majority of females have some level of dissatisfaction with their bodies. What you hate in your 20's, you begin to accept in your 30's. I think aging (and the associated changes that come to your body including aches and pains) makes you realize how good you used to have it, and you regret not appreciating it more at the time.

PS - I am jealous of women who have ever been able to say they were able to be unconscious of their bodies.

[DoesntMatter]

I'm comfortable with my body. I have a feeling this is more of a girl problem Besides, I think most guys can make themselves look better by simply going to the gym for a few months.

Appearance is a little different. Sometimes I'll go a week trying to look as decent as I can so I don't turn off any girls, the next I won't care and will go a week without shaving, combing my hair, or just giving a **** in general.

[Tiay]

short answer.. no. and I don't think I ever will be completely, no matter what I do. That's part of what I miss about being a kid- your body was like your vessel, and you weren't conscious of it.

Then it f*cking stabs you in the back, starts bleeding and changing and growing shit it didn't have before and generally giving you all kinds of problems. makes you really uncomfy within your skin.

THEN, once you're finally on speaking terms with your body again and things are starting to go your way and your lifestyle is finally such that you can take care of yourself much better than at college.. THEN your body starts getting old and saggy and painful, whilst you feel young on the inside.

grrrr. negative today.

[Charlie Boy II]

I like my body. It's not perfect but I go to the gym, surf and swim so I'm in good shape.

As I get older though I'm starting to get paranoid about losing my hair. It's not happening yet, but at the first signs I'm taking action. Both my uncles on my mother's side, my maternal grandfather and my maternal cousin all lost their hair by the time they hit thirty. Anyway, I'd say that'd be my biggest tweak, but that hasn't actually happened yet and it can be treated.

[vashti]

Bald is beautiful.

[bohemiandonut]

No worries here about losing my hair, just my unbelievably ridiculous good looks. And is there any way I could gain a few inches in height during my 20s?

To provide some data for the poster, I am very satisfied with my body, but this is after 2-3 years of finally getting into a routine that works in terms of hygiene, nutrition, and regular exercise. Still, nothing makes as big of a difference as adopting a natural, high fiber, low sugar diet.

[vashti]

The following was posted on another forum I visit:

I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I
have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my
body, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, and the sagging butt. And often I am
taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror (who looks like my
mother!), but I don't agonize over those things for long.

I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my
loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've
become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own
friend.

I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not
making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need,
but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to a treat, to be
messy, to be extravagant.

I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon;
before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.

Whose business is it if I choose to read or play on the
computer until 4 AM and sleep until noon ?

I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the
60&70's, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love ... I
will.

I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a
bulging body, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to,
despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.

I know I am sometimes forgetful But there again, some of life
is just as well forgotten. And I eventually remember the important things.

Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your
heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even
when somebody's beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what
give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is
pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair
turning gray, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep
grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died
before their hair could turn silver.

As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less
about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've
even earned the right to be wrong.

[LostNotFound]

^woah

anyways erm no ones seen me naked. no one. my sister/ mum may have seen me topless but that is it.

i am so self concious about getting naked. when the time comes for me and my SO i'm gona have had to have built some naked self confidence or otherwise i'm gona b hiding under the covers!

[Junket]

i am so self concious about getting naked. when the time comes for me and my SO i'm gona have had to have built some naked self confidence or otherwise i'm gona b hiding under the covers!

Pussy.

_________

[LostNotFound]

Frasbee Quote:
Originally Posted by LostNotFound
i am so self concious about getting naked. when the time comes for me and my SO i'm gona have had to have built some naked self confidence or otherwise i'm gona b hiding under the covers!
Pussy.


^^ yes i have one...

[Tiay]

actually, I didn't really answer these properly, let me give it another shot.

Are most people happy and satisfied with themselves apart from a few niggling things perhaps?

I'd tend to agree with this... though.... I don't know the figures but I'd guess that quite a startling amount of girls especially do have serious issues with themselves, even if they actually look okay, to the extent of causing eating disorders and such.

Or is it common to get distressed (to whatever degree) about your appearance/body?

depends how you define distress. Apparently it is "extreme anxiety, sorrow, or pain."
sure I feel anxious sometimes, or sorrow about the unfortunate un-symmetry of my eyelids, but not "extreme".

How do you actually feel about your body? Are you comfortable with it?

guess I answered that. no, not really. my body isn't listening to me. trying to control it is like trying to rein in a wild horse.

Are you (at least fairly) confident being naked in both your own company and in the company of another person?

with myself? always. and with my boyfriend.. since recently, yes. Worrying about sucking in your stomach and such while being intimate just sucks the fun out of it.

And do you feel satisfied when you're dressed with your appearance?

meh.. it's ok.

[mr_fahrenheit]

Wow thank you for the interesting, inspiring and helpful answers.

I'm not sure whether I'm more or less confused about it all now though hehe.

How horrible that its so common for women to be dissatisfied with themselves

I think women are beautiful in lots of different shapes and sizes.

Seems like guys have some nagging things but a lot of the time (though not always) have more of a take it or leave it chilled out attitude to it (and find it easier/faster to shape up, in general, just 'cos of the way our bodies work). So unfair that is awww.

Thank you for taking the time and effort to explain this stuff.
I feel like I understand what my sister is going through a little more. Plus some helpful stuff for myself too.