Why do guys play games?

[Lozenger]

Do you have any adults who you are close to?

No, not really.

[Lozenger]

- He is a kind a guy the loves telling his buddies "this chick always sends me messages I don't know how to get rid of her"

I think this is what the guy I made eye contact with was doing - but I just ignored his gazes today and have vowed myself never to speak to the dickhead again!

[vashti]

No, not really.

You should find one... maybe a mentor, or something. Someone who is responsible and isn't all messed up emotionally.

[Lozenger]

For the moment.. let's ignore the (b*tch) population (unless you'd like me to focus on how to deal with them in HS).. let's just focus on the (jerk) population..GrkScorp

I deal with them only by ignoring them as though they don't exist. I even talk over them. I don't want to waste my time or breath on people like them.

Thoughtful, considerate, sensitive, understanding, affectionate, loving, warm, honest, genuine, supportive, motivational, positive, and good long-term providers.. most importantly.. they're loyal..GrkScorp

Now that sounds like a good guy! *dreams*

So.., you can sit there.. crying to no end.. about all the bad apples around you.. that's one way to handle things..., or.., as you're reading this.. you can think about a couple of guys who are not like the rest... and as you think about a couple of names or faces that stand out or come to mind.. you can start to see not only which ones are the good apples.. but how to go about reaching them.. how to ignore all those bad apples.. and start to see which good apples you want to grab a hold of.. now.., that's an other way to handle things.. it's really up to you which one you prefer..GrkScorp

Lol, I'm not going to cry and I'm also not going to look for the good apples as I'm not physically attracted to the good ones unfortunately and I have decided to just concentrate on my studies and having a good time with my friends




Thank you all so much for your advice - it's made me feel soo much better!


X

[Lozenger]

You should find one... maybe a mentor, or something. Someone who is responsible and isn't all messed up emotionally.

Yes, that would be good - but I find it hard to trust people and open up to them, so I concentrate for now on building closer relationships with my friends

X

[Mish]

To any male out there or anyone else who knows the anwser, why do guys play mind games?
Like, why will they talk to you like you're the coolest girl they know and suddenly stop?
Or, as I have emailed some people, why would a guy give you eye contact, talk lots face to face and smile at you lots but then totally ignore you online or ignore your texts? (P.s I'm not one of those girls who texts constantly)

X

Entering the discussion late. I don't think these are good examples of guy game playing. They could have acted like that for a whole range of different reasons. Don't forget, Schools are a breeding ground for gossip and territotrial behaviour. People change friends like socks in there.

Hmmm - I still choose to just switch off all my feelings for anyone.
I'm not the type who plays games or does tests, I don't think I even know how. But I'm fed up of always being the victim or the one on the outside. It's not just with guys, it's with everyone.

People have stereotyped me and lots of people dislike me for no reason. My family isn't a family, we are 5 individuals under one roof and I feel awkard about hugging my own mum because I don't feel close to her or my siblings. I've given up with my dad, I only see him once or twice a year and he always gets presents for his gfs daughter who is my age but he doesn't send me anything at times, and when he does, it's money through the post.

I've dealt with fake friends and loads of people have bullied me because of my appearance. Now when loads say that you are ugly or whatever, and that nobody has actually taken a general interest in you, you start to believe it. I never felt I could talk to anyone about me being bullied as I didn't feel close enough to anyone.
And on top of it, you get guys who are popular who think they can mock me, or play with me as though I have no feelings and another thing I don't understand is, why do guys actually love/like nasty girls?

All the guys claim to fancy all the fake girls who look like clones of one another, or they like the ones that are really bitchy towards others, ie, me. And yet they are the ones who get admired and loved by everybody and as I'm not a bad/nasty person I just don't see why people wouldn't like me either.

You've probably guessed, but I feel really down right now and don't feel close enough to anyone to say how I feel. For 12 years that all this has gone on, I've always dealt with it on my own and now with exam stress on top it's getting to the point where I just feel like giving up.

Hey there. It sounds like you're under a lot of stress. And rightfully so. Putting up with the nasty girls, dealing with parents seperation, also some hypocritical behaviour, now all these mean and wierd boys, that's a lot for anyone to deal with especially for someone your age. It's really a lot to taken in right now when you think about it. A lot of our lives rely on systems of support, friends, family, co-workers. We come to them for advice or help with problems and they make us feel better. It's almost unnoticeable the effect this has, until these systems of support get reduced and dwindle. Fending off for yourself can be very lonely. I remember these dark times as well, I remember what it was like so I appreciate and understand where you are coming from. If it's of any consolation to you, it will get easier. You will find a way to have good friends, you will most likely patch things up (or at least make them better) with most family, with experience dealing with these situations will become easier and making right choices with boys will become easier as well. For now, try to find some good friends. People who like you and understand you. People you can trust. Get a group of your own with which you can hang out and do things. You will see, with time it will get easier to deal with all of the above for you

[Kromat]

Lozenger, visit this link and read my word documents, it might make you feel better.
[url]http://www.loveforum.net/love-advice-forum/21713-kromatic-journey.html[/url]

What I've been through, and how I dealt with it, It might seem like just
10 months, but I have learned a lot from this.
I thought I was in exile and didn't belong, but then I decided to make some changes,
and now everything is for the better.

[Charlie Boy II]

Guys play games with women to boost their ego. Manipulating women using your own charms brings a powerful, if short-lived sense of affirmation. It makes you feel good about yourself. Most guys grow out of it around their mid-20's. The exception is guys who missed out on female attention earlier in thier lives and are still proving to themselves that they're attractive to women.