My girlfriend left me after 3 1/2 years... any help?

[tankian]

Ok here is my story. I'm almost 20 years old and 2 weeks ago my girlfriend of 18 1/2 years old left me after 3 1/2 years of a wonderful relationship. In the last weeks we broke up 2 times saying to me that she loves me, then after a day or two the last time left for good saying there aren't feelings anymore. Besides that, she left me for some dude in a stupid online game, which she hasn't met in her life by now, and is from another city in my country. A few days after the break-up i was devastated. Now i kind of hate her, or wish to hate her, and i don't have that heart ache anymore. The problem is i can't get her out of my head. I went on a date with a nice girl these days but i couldn't concentrate too much on her and even though she looks nice, i don't see anything else at her so i said to her i don't want to meet her anymore. I go out with friends, but after i get home i start to think about her again. Any solution to forget about her and start dating with another girl? (to be actually interested in all her aspects, without reminding me of my ex)

[shh!]

It's emotionally irrresponsible for you to be dating anyone else. It is far too soon. Do your grieving, and THEN start dating.

[tankian]

It's emotionally irrresponsible for you to be dating anyone else. It is far too soon. Do your grieving, and THEN start dating.

I guess you are right, but i feel miserable by staying all day and thinking of her, cause i don't have many things to ocupy my time with. That's why i thought dating will help me forget fast.

[SimpleSolution]

You can date right away thats fine.....your problem is that you are not content with yourself. Try and realize that you are more important than anyone on this earth you must be content with yourself. Go get yourself 2 or 3 girlfriends and really be friends with them it is fine to do this as long as you are truthful and if you are really lucky maybe you will find the one who understands you........and not to mention you are both very young and still growing so i would say your ex does love you however it is time for you both to move on.

[shh!]

I guess you are right, but i feel miserable by staying all day and thinking of her, cause i don't have many things to ocupy my time with. That's why i thought dating will help me forget fast.

You won't forget, my friend, but you will get through it. You need some time to grieve and to reflect on this relationship. This can be a growth opportunity for you, if you let it. Many people spend their time trying to avoid the pain of a break up, never learning the lessons they should have about how to choose and maintain healthy relationships. Learn your lessons, and you will be in a better position to choose a girl wisely next time, and how to properly nourish a relationship.

If it makes you feel any better, you are quite young. You have plenty of time to meet the right girl, and now you have some experience to draw from.

[Cain]

What game was it?

I find it amazing that she'd end a relationship after nearly four years to pursue someone she's never met... maybe never even seen a picture of... and even if she had, no telling if he's lying.

She sounds like a tramp. And a bitch.

[shh!]

She sounds young and quite immature to me.

[tankian]

Thanks for the advices Shh!, they really helped.
About the game it's named World Of Warcraft, a stupid game which is addictive and throws you off reality. She has seen pictures of him i guess, anyway i moved on, in time I'll stop thinking about her, I just need to find a more mature girl.

[Cain]

I had a feeling that WoW was the game. It is definitely addictive and some people make it their whole life. I used to play it... I know... I've seen people literally go crazy about something happening in the game.

Honestly, be glad this happened so you could get rid of her. She shouldn't have chosen the game over you. The only reason I played it is because of the distance with my gf. If she and I were living together now, I wouldn't be playing that stupid game. She'll always come before anything else.

[Mish]

To froget her, go out and spend time with friends, surround yourself with people. The best revenge is to live a happy life.

[Priincy]

Just think about all the negative things about your ex. Think about how much she disrespected you and your guys` relationship. When you get home... Turn on some music that`ll cheer you up or watch some movies with your family. At least that helped me through my divorce.

[Nice Lover Boy]

Hey Tankian, I wouldn't date 18 year olds...they don't know what they want yet. You have better priorities going on for yourself. Go use them and get a better girlie who will not leave you for immature activities.