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Thread: A little help needed

  1. #1
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    A little help needed

    I have been dating a guy for almost 3 years who is a liar.He has lied to me about other women in his life and many other things.It's got now so if he told me it was raining out I would look to see for myself.I love him very much and have tried to move on and I feel so crappy that I let him work his way back in to my life.I don't want to feel crappy for losing him,but I feel that if he isn't going to stop lying that I need to move on for my own sanity.I have confronted him many times on his lies and he either has another cover story to cover up that lie or turns it around to be my fault somehow.He says I can't take everything he says so literally or that it's just a little lie what does it matter.Right now he has been talking to another woman and spending time with her,when he does this he lies about where he is and who he talks too,but I don't give up until I get the truth.When I confront him he says they are "just friends".Any advice would be greatly appreciated!!!!!

  2. #2
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    Uh... the advice is common sense. Leave him.

  3. #3
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    Not just leave him, forget about him, stop giving him undeserved love, and egg his house.

  4. #4
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    You know what you need to do so gather up that strength and walk away. Remove all contact and reminders of him. He is a waste of life and is taking up valuable space on the planet.

  5. #5
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    They aren't 'just friends'. Trust your instincts. Move on.
    Second thoughts can generally be amended with judicious action; injudicious actions can seldom be recovered with second thoughts.
    --Cyteen by C.J.Cherryh

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    Whatever kind of emotional soothing he is giving is NOT worth being lied to over and over again, and possibly cheated on. This guy ain't going to change. Dump his ass now, and don't give him any more second chances. There are plenty of guys out there that aren't serial liars.

    The sooner you get this guy out of your life, the sooner you can heal and be happy again.

    Good luck!

  7. #7
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    Well so far I have ignored one call and 2 texts from him tonight.I forgot to mention he is very possessive and has already drove by at least once tonight to see if I'm home alone,who knows how many times I didn't see. I keep telling myself " I deserve better and he's not going to change." Maybe you guys can help me ,I don't have any friends or anything to turn too,so maybe with encouragement I can do it this time.

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    Leave him and stay strong.

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    it true you should leave him but it sound like he's got a addiction i mean he's addicted to sex/girls and the lying, he can change but he's got to want to change and he needs help, like going to a Sex addiction meeting. if he want to put in the time it could work but if he's not going to help him self then you can't help him

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by anachronistic View Post
    Not just leave him, forget about him, stop giving him undeserved love, and egg his house.
    Lmao @ egg his house!

    He's got issues. Leave him and ignore him. So what if he's texting you? Who knows how many other women he's texting too...

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by njbromilow View Post
    it true you should leave him but it sound like he's got a addiction i mean he's addicted to sex/girls and the lying, he can change but he's got to want to change and he needs help, like going to a Sex addiction meeting. if he want to put in the time it could work but if he's not going to help him self then you can't help him
    I know that some people with addictions can change, but from what I've noticed, liars don't tend to stop being liars. Compulsive liars are pretty set in their ways and from personal experience, they don't want nor will they change.

  12. #12
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    Well I broke down and talked to him twice today.I felt the first time I had to say that it was goodbye and it was over this time for good,then he started in how what a terrible person I am and that I can't prove he is lying and so what if he did a few times before, so I hung up on him crying.Stupid me answered when he called back He said there is no way either of us can go very long without talking to the other one on the phone.That will be the hardest part,we spent many hours on the phone together.Last night every time I had the urge to call him I just came and read all your comments and stayed strong.And that is what I'm going to keep doing!!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by mamabird View Post
    Well I broke down and talked to him twice today.I felt the first time I had to say that it was goodbye and it was over this time for good,then he started in how what a terrible person I am and that I can't prove he is lying and so what if he did a few times before, so I hung up on him crying.Stupid me answered when he called back He said there is no way either of us can go very long without talking to the other one on the phone.That will be the hardest part,we spent many hours on the phone together.Last night every time I had the urge to call him I just came and read all your comments and stayed strong.And that is what I'm going to keep doing!!!!
    Just remember that he's a compulsive liar and you deserve better!

  14. #14
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    mamabird - you need to set up a emotional support system. Why don't you have any girlfriends? You need people to hang out with and fill time with while you are getting over this lying loser.

    Do you have any hobbies? Or perhaps you can take a class of some sort... anything to get you away from the phone. You need to build a life that doesn't include him.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by shh! View Post
    mamabird - you need to set up a emotional support system. Why don't you have any girlfriends? You need people to hang out with and fill time with while you are getting over this lying loser.

    Do you have any hobbies? Or perhaps you can take a class of some sort... anything to get you away from the phone. You need to build a life that doesn't include him.
    I have worked from home for the most part since 99 when I moved to where I live now,I basically don't know anyone around here.

    I have hobbies-hence Mamabird I have 26 birds plus 2 Saint Bernard's.I also run my own business from home and work part time doing paperwork for another company.(no other office people there) My phone is always on my hip and my head set on my ear,so it's hard to get away from the phone. I'm going to keep coming here and reading and have you all help me get thru it all this time.

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