Am I unfair?

[michzel creativ]

Hi! guys this is my first post and I hoping for a good advice...

I got this 6years relationship and going steady, but I think there something wrong with my love affection to her. Because I've got this love at first sight girl before we had a relationship with my new gf. And if ever I talk to her from my past crush we always argue even though we haven't a relationship with that girl.
One time she arrived in our country and I beg for my present gf to meet my past crush, Well she allowed me but there was noting happen to us just talking and I found out that she has already a boy friend too. I don't know but it hurts me...my present gf is very considerate even though I always dumped her, she's always there for me what ever happens.

I got this confusion,(about this past crush) why do I always think of her?.... and.... I don't know why it hurts whenever I hear that she's having fun with her new bf and she even told me that "this would be the guy that i'm going to have a steady relationship".
I hurts me to hear that....what else would I do cry in front of her?...so I just smiled and nod.

[Junket]

You introduced your present girlfriend to your crush?

Dude, you are seriously jacked in the head, where the hell did they teach you common sense?

[michzel creativ]

your so rude...
they where friends and teammates in volleyball.

[CherriBlossomGirl]

The way I look at this is that you don't truly love your girlfriend. Maybe it's a subconscious thought, but you don't want to be with her. You keep dumping her, you think of other women, and you even introduce her to your crush? Rewind, you have a crush when you have a girlfriend? That's a problem.

I'm sure you don't want to hurt your present girlfriend's feelings, and so you've stuck with her. But if you truly loved her, you wouldn't think about other women. Why are you with her? Truly? You have to ask yourself that.

Honestly, your ass would've been out the door years ago if I was in her shoes. I don't lust after other men when I'm in love. EVER. I don't think about my ex-boyfriends and how they're doing. I don't care. I don't crush on other men. I love, adore the person I'm with and I care only for him, and he cares only for me. The moment he starts thinking of other women, it's out the door. If you truly love a person, you don't think about being with others.

[maybeoneday]

I couldn't agree more with Cherriblossomgirl..

[michzel creativ]

Thanks for that...I tried to explain to her everything that we should be apart for sometime but she wont allow it.
Its been a long time that we've been through all the problems and failures in life she's there for me. She's very supportive and really love me very much.
So how could I let her go without hurting her feelings?
I sometimes tell to my girlfriend that we have chatted my past gf and talk about something special, I guess this is the way that I could be free to her.

[Junket]

I'm rude?

At least I don't have a crush I've invited my girlfriend to talk to.

You're being completely selfish. You wanna have a girlfriend for the sake of having one. You treat her like a hobby that you pick up and put down as you please, and you have the nerve to get all emotional when some random crush talks about her boyfriend?

You need a good slap in the face and I would nominate nobody but the girl who has been puttin' up with your shit for the past 6 years.

[CherriBlossomGirl]

Thanks for that...I tried to explain to her everything that we should be apart for sometime but she wont allow it.
Its been a long time that we've been through all the problems and failures in life she's there for me. She's very supportive and really love me very much.
So how could I let her go without hurting her feelings?
I sometimes tell to my girlfriend that we have chatted my past gf and talk about something special, I guess this is the way that I could be free to her.

Any pity I might have had is gone. Now you're just making excuses. No one can make you stay with them, unless they are holding a gun to your head. If you don't love her, then you tell her that and break it off. Bam. Done. I bet you've dropped subtle hints and been disappointed when she didn't take them. If you have so many reasons to break up with her, then just do it. You are doing neither her nor you a favor by staying with her to spare her feelings.

Simple solution. Break up. Saying "she won't allow it" tells me that you have never truly sat her down, talked to her, and broken it off. You are a person. As such, you have choices. She can no more MAKE you stay than you can MAKE yourself love her.

Cut the shit. Stop making excuses.

[1averagejoe]

Really now...how old are you? Are you mentally ill? Your girlfriend should have dumped your sorry ass long ago.

You don't go crushing over girls while you're with a girlfriend. That's ****ed up. Ask yourself how you would feel if she was after some other guy right now.

If your answer is, you wouldn't care. You don't love your girlfriend.

[michzel creativ]

I don't know! I sit and talk to her a lot of times, I even told her that my parents doesn't like her. But the truth is they like her...

And I guess this would be the better way to broke up with her that I'm with somebody else.
I think she's going to stop loving me if I'm going to do this.
Is this the right thing?
I love her of course, But i just don't understand why she's so patient to me. Maybe she's thinking that if ever we broke up and I'm going to be with my crush, I wont succeed because she has a boyfriend as of now. But luckily I do have a better looking compared to his..

[Dasein]

First thing first..where are you from your English is terrible?

Ok second. You need to let your current girlfriend go. There is no easy way to break up. Feelings are always hurt..just don't be a bastard about it.

[CherriBlossomGirl]

I'm rude?

At least I don't have a crush I've invited my girlfriend to talk to.

You're being completely selfish. You wanna have a girlfriend for the sake of having one. You treat her like a hobby that you pick up and put down as you please, and you have the nerve to get all emotional when some random crush talks about her boyfriend?

You need a good slap in the face and I would nominate nobody but the girl who has been puttin' up with your shit for the past 6 years.

I don't know! I sit and talk to her a lot of times, I even told her that my parents doesn't like her. But the truth is they like her...

And I guess this would be the better way to broke up with her that I'm with somebody else.
I think she's going to stop loving me if I'm going to do this.
Is this the right thing?
I love her of course, But i just don't understand why she's so patient to me. Maybe she's thinking that if ever we broke up and I'm going to be with my crush, I wont succeed because she has a boyfriend as of now. But luckily I do have a better looking compared to his..

Wrong. You don't love her. You think the best way to break up with her is to cheat on her? Just get with someone else and THEN tell her it's over? You've lied to her to try and get her to break up with you. YOU DO NOT LOVE THIS PERSON IN ANY CAPACITY. If you did, you wouldn't lie, you wouldn't want to try and break it off by cheating, and you wouldn't drag it out to torture this person more.

You don't love her. You know it. Don't claim to. You know, I would feel bad for your girlfriend if I didn't think she was a small-brained know-nothing for putting up with you at all. And I refuse to waste anymore time or breath on you. You want validation for being an asshole, and I'm not going to provide. I've put in my say, now go ahead and ignore it as I know you will.

[Illusional]

i'ts not love at first sight.. it's infatuation. you're wondering what a great relationship you could probably have with this girl, but the truth is that you won't know unless you try. but beware, because i feel that you've put this girl on a pedestal and she probably won't be what you expect her to be.

raverboy

[michzel creativ]

ok, at first this girl(my crush) I met first before my current girlfriend. We had a happy relationship like friends and I was too slow to court her because I'm afraid of losing her. I thought I was at my first step, but things change bec. she's studying in a far away country. So every time I knew that she was in our town I always take time to be with her.
And one day she's telling me that she's dating with someone in there school, It really hurts me very badly. And that time I realize to stop dreaming of her.
Time goes on...and I finally moved on, months later I've meet my current gf. I offer my respect and everything to her.
Yes your right I put her on a pedestal, but I cant really stop on reminiscing my past.

Is there any other way?

[1averagejoe]

Is there any other way?

Start by breaking up with your current girlfriend. She doesn't deserve someone like you.