What Did I Do To Her?

[dang]

I am in college and graduate in december. I met a girl over the summer and things were going great. We were not dating or anything but we became close. We had fooled around a few times.

So the fall semester started about three weeks ago and her behavior towards me totally changed. She started to avoid me at school and was extremely cold towards me. I knew that we would see each other less becuase of our schedule but the change was night and day. She became extremely abrasive towards me and totally changed her personailty around me. After a few weeks of this I stopped calling/texting her.

I have one theory about this though. The first few days of the semester, she was very normal around me. Later in the first week, one of her very close friends switched classes to our class and this is when everything turned south. From then on, they came in together and sat together away from me even though I know they could see me. The thing is though that I know they are not dating, they are just friends. I have a feeling that her friend might that said something to her about me or something like that. So again, after this happened for a few weeks, I stopped calling her.

The shocking thing was what happened a few days ago. I had found out that my mom was diagnosed with cancer. So obviously I was upset and I texted her(she prefers texting), she never replied. She never called me back. Because of her behavior these past few weeks, I can only assume she intentionally did not call me back. Especially considering the subject matter of the text, I took extreme offense to this. Now my mom's cancer turned out to be operable and she will be fine but I did not know that at the time. I normally would not have called her because of her behavior but I was not thinking clearly because of the situation.

The thing that really gets to me is that I didnt do anything to her to warrant her to stop talking to me or being extremely cold towards me. I have been very nice to her. I feel like she caught me doing something shocking or something along those lines. I thought that she might be mad that I stopped calling her but I dont think that is a valid excuse because I did that based on her behavior these past few weeks.

Has anyone been through this? Any suggestions? I will not call her again because of this but we have a few classes together and I will she her again, probably this week.

Thanks...........

[kene]

It seems extremely obvious that she wants nothing to do with you. I had something similar happen to me once, but instead of someone I know getting cancer, it was me getting into a car accident. I emailed a bunch of people telling them about it and she was the only one who DIDN'T reply.

If I were you, I'd just man up and approach her and say "I can't help but think you're trying to avoid me... just wanted to know why."

Either it's a misunderstanding and things are cool and that's great. And if she still acts wishy washy bullshitty, tell her to grow up, and leave it at that.

[dang]

I guess I could ask her up front about it, unfortunately at school I would feel uncomfortable talking to her about it with everyone around. I will probably see her tommorow and its ironic because I am friends with one of her friends and I would have to sit away from him as well if I dont want to see her.

The only thing here is that she does stuff like this alot with other people. She doesnt some return calls, answer her phone, or answer text messages alot. But I thought because of the subject matter that she would respond to me. She actually was extremely rude to one of her friends today whom I was with at the time where she texted him, then he decided to call her instead of texting back immediately after receiving the text, and she doesnt answer her phone becuase she didnt want to talk on the phone with him. So basically this type of behavior isnt uncommon with her.

I guess it just bothers me because I did nothing to this girl and she is acting as though we were going out and she caught me cheating on her or something. I have no idea what happened becuase I have always been nice to her and never did anything to warrant this behavior.

The thing that I wish out of all of this is that I never met this girl. Shes the one who initiated things; she asked me to hang out sometime, so its not like I asked her out and she felt bad and just hung out with me and never liked me. Her new behavior basically started about three weeks ago. I have learned with this girl that she can get very moody at times and not to take everything she does seriuosly but I think her not replying to me was a huge deal.